


Love in the Apoco-not

by Thecrimsondagger



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: 6000 Years of Pining (Good Omens), BDSM, Car Sex, Multi, Mutual Pining, Oral Sex, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rough Sex, Semi-Public Sex, Sex Toys, The Author Regrets Nothing, Threesome - F/M/M, Vibrators
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-04
Updated: 2020-03-25
Packaged: 2020-04-07 19:00:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 52,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19091137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thecrimsondagger/pseuds/Thecrimsondagger
Summary: She's been there from the beginning with them. She's full of the beauty of heaven... Shame she has an attitude fit for hell and a temper like hell fire. But she loves them, and they love her. The apoco-not is only the beginning for these three. Warning for MXM action as well as three ways and everything delicious that will send you to hell, see you there bitches, got a room ready.





	1. Through the centuries

Every so often, you will meet an individual who can only be described as magnetic. This sort of person can draw you in with a simple smile, filled with confidence and mystery, or a simple look that seems to promise the lure of something exquisite. Their walk is filled with purpose and their very aura is vibrant. Someone so enticing is never easy to forget, no matter how much time passes by.

The first time they met Sophia had been in the garden of Eden, they hadn’t spoken to her, only watched as she glided through the lush vegetation, a robe of pure white clinging to her shoulders as wings fluttered in the gentle breeze, a strange silver tinge to the feathers. Beauty oozed from her like no other angel in their opinion.

“Have you spoken to her yet? Seems to me she’s worth a quick natter”

“Don’t be ridiculous, that’s Sophia, angel of love. She’s too busy filling the garden and the hearts of Adam and Eve. She hardly has the time for ‘a quick natter’ as you put it”

The demon smirked, rustling his black feathers and sending a meaningful glance to the angel as he stared of in indignation. 

“That’s probably gonna change pretty soon… Told me to come up and make some trouble after all”

The angel’s eyes widened with worry as Sophia seemed to vanish and the next minute, she was in front of them, eyes burning with rage as she spoke to them for the first time, to the demon mostly much to the angel’s annoyance.

“Right, you scaly bastard, what did you do!”

***

The next time they met was many years later. Aziraphale had been left as the host of heaven on earth and Crowley had been left to do his thing as well, occasionally carrying out his own demonic orders. They were watching in discomfort as the nails were hammered into the man upon the cross, his cried of ‘father forgive them, they know not what they do’ filling the air.

“Did you meet him?” whispered Aziraphale, wincing at the sound of the hammer hitting the final nail.

“Yes… bright young man. I showed him all the kingdoms of earth”

Crowley wasn’t really paying much attention anymore, eyes catching sight of a lone woman walking, unnoticed, towards the crucifix. There was an unmistakable look of sheer annoyance on that pretty face.

“Why would you do that?”

“Well, he’s a carpenter from galilee… not much opportunity for travel otherwise. What did he say to get everyone so riled up?”

Aziraphale sighed, not yet noticing the young woman as she seethed beneath the cross.

“Be kind to each other”

“Well that will do it”

There was a roar of exasperation, the humans around them only feeling it as a gust of strong wind as finally Aziraphale noticed Sophia, turned towards them and throwing her arms into the air.

“How am I meant to work on love amongst humans when they kill each other at the drop of a hat! Do you hear me you morons, give me a break here!” 

Aziraphale broke out into a huge grin, happy to see another of his kind here as he gave a small wave to catch her attention.

“Sophia! Such a pleasant surprise, you look radiant as ever”

Blazing eyes turned on him as she stalked over, finally allowing humans to catch glimpse but otherwise pay her no mind.

“Why in all the kingdoms of heaven are our lot making my job a million times harder! ‘Go spread love Sophia, show them that heaven holds them dear’ I do as I’m told and no one thinks to mention ‘hey, by the way, we’re going to convince them to crucify our main human and have them do it to loads of others too’, Gabriel is getting an earful when I get up there”

As an after thought she turned her back, facing to the sky and yelling for heaven to hear.

“When those bastards let me come back up!”

Aziraphale fidgeted as she sent waves towards heaven, a strange thought telling him that Gabriel was probably enjoying the attention. He’d hoped to avoid a telling off from Sophia, Crowley had not enjoyed it so much when she had turned her ire on him in Eden. But he couldn’t deny that, even in her anger, she was a vision of beauty. Hair like fire and eyes of the greenest grass, skin sun kissed and petite in figure. Such a lovely little creature bestowed from heaven… Such a shame that her temper matched the fires of hell.

“From what I hear, heaven is letting you cool off after the shouting match you had with Gabriel last time over the whole arc business… Think he likes letting you simmer”

Aziraphale jabbed his elbow into the demons ribs, silently telling him to be quiet as Sophia turned once more, looking more peeved now than before, giving a huff and stomping off, yelling behind her as she went.

“Is that so Crowley, Well sod this for a game of soldiers. I’m getting drunk. You fools are free to join me”

Both angel and demon didn’t need a second invitation, following behind as she muttered continuously, Crowley winking at Aziraphale and watching the angel blush slightly.

“Who’d have thought that the angel of love could be so feisty, makes sense, she’s made sex a lot more active for both sides in the past few centuries… Now I get why Gabriel likes her so much”

Aziraphale scowled at that. Something about that particular angel getting his hands on Sophia seemed to leave a bad taste in his mouth. An unspoken mutual feeling seemed to pass over Crowley as well, he didn’t really like the idea either.

“Catch up or I’ll drink the whole inn before you get there!”

Her shout was like a turbo charge in their step, Crowley appreciating the way her hips swayed and Aziraphale blushing as every human that she walked past seemed to become overrun with love, grabbing onto the nearest body and acting upon the feeling. She was making a point and sending a silent ‘screw you’ towards the heavens. To hell if she’d play by their rules anymore. She was love and she was going to start acting on it as best she could.

***

One thing they had learned to expect from Sophia was that she liked to disappear from them for much longer than they disappeared from each other. She’d been gone for so long that both Aziraphale and Crowley thought she’d actually been recalled to heaven and been allowed to go to town on arguing with Gabriel about all the injustices in the world that made her job harder. It was a bit of a shock really when they’d discovered the reason why she could argue so freely with an arch angel. She wasn’t far behind them in rank and just as needed. They’d always thought she was the same level as Aziraphale but with a much more volatile attitude.

The next time she reared her head had been during the witch burning years of England, during the late 1500’s, dressed like a harlot of the streets, her breasts pushed up as she sauntered through the streets with all eyes on her. 

“Well hello boys… fancy some fun?”

At first, his back to her, Aziraphale had turned to politely decline the wenches advances, only to splutter as she pressed up to him with a coy smile on her face, Crowley grinning madly at the change of attitude. That was something he’d been waiting to see. Millennia of raunchy sex and only an irate angel of love, who rarely showed a sexy side, to blame it on. This was definitely more like it.

“Sophia! This is hardly the behaviour of an angel of heaven!”

“I like it”

Aziraphale sent a seething glance at Crowley as Sophia sent an airy laugh his way, accepting Crowley’s hand and instead pushing herself up against the demon, sparking a pang of jealousy through the angel as he scowled.

“Glad you like it Crowley, sweetie, I figured I’d have fun with my role, no point in being the angel of love if you can’t participate every now and then”

“So, you’ve made an effort?”

Even Crowley was surprised, delighted but still shocked as she gave a wicked smirk and winked at him, hitching her skirt ever so slightly, showing the smallest bit of creamy ankle that could have stopped the heart of any human man during this century, and maybe more than a few other centuries in the future.

“That and some, I like it. So much better than constantly getting annoyed with the higher ups for the crappy orders. I’m doing things my way now, and its delectable… You should have seen the orgies of old Rome”

“Oh, I did, joined in once or twice two, didn’t think it was directly because of you though, pretty one”

As Sophia and Crowley exchanged their memories of debauchery, Aziraphale felt himself getting more and more irate himself, suddenly feeling like he might rain brimstone down as the only thing he could think of sprang from his lips.

“Witch!”

He’d shouted it far too loud, both Sophia and Crowley looking at him in mixed horror and annoyance as, quicker than they had thought, a mob gathered round them, pointing at Sophia and chanting that same word. They were charged by Aziraphale’s ire even after the angel had realised his colossal cock-up, Sophia being dragged away for trial and inevitable sentencing as Crowley scowled at him.

“You realise you’re a bloody idiot, right? You’ve just sent the angel of love, the moodiest bitch in the history of everything, to burn at the stake. She’ll be discorporated, sent back to heaven for a new body, fight the toss with Gabriel for a bit and then, after all the paperwork, she’ll have a real bone to pick with you when she’d sent back”

“Oh… bugger”

***

It was the sixties. Time of free love, drugs and great music. A time to fight against the man for a better world. Aziraphale liked to think that it was something good on heaven’s part, shame that hell had to spoil it all with sexual disease and political angst. The only issue was that, neither he nor Crowley had since Sophia since she’d been discorporated at the stake. Had she been permanently kept in heaven? No new body for the raunchy little angel of love on account of bad behaviour. Somehow, he got the feeling that that wasn’t the reason.

He was sat in his bookshop, happily sharing a bottle of wine with Crowley when it had happened, the demon suddenly laughing out loud as he pointed at the window, mirth in his eyes as Aziraphale turned to look, his face going pale at the sight.

“Looks like you have your punishment, angel”

Outside was a young woman. Beautiful, flaming red hair and eyes like a emeralds, small in figure but her breasts were a little more prominent than last he’d seen, she was dressed in the most UpToDate fashion of Twiggy as she stared angrily through the window at Aziraphale, sending more than a few rude gestures his way before flicking her wrist and appearing right in front of them both.

“Well hell, pretty one, you look totally bodacious in your new body”

“New body my arse you demonic prick! Same bloody body, different fashion sense. Aziraphale! What the hell do you think you were playing at sending me to the stake! Do you want to know what happened when I got back to heaven!”

She was seething in all her glory, more annoyed than she’d ever been, leaning over Aziraphale as the angel slouched and met her eyes tentatively. Crowley was quite enjoying the view from up her skirt. Still making an effort it seemed.

Aziraphale tried to give an answer but was cut short. She was in no mood for his fancy words.

“As soon as I got back to heaven, Gabriel was more than happy to meet with me! I tried giving that douche a piece of my mind, instead he tried to grab a piece of my arse! I have spent nearly four hundred years with him acting like a rutting bull! It’s only because this decade is so keen on love that I got free you bastard! Do you realise that Gabriel was happy to keep me there until he got his end away, it’d only because the higher ups wanted an actual representative of love on earth that I got away from that dick!”

“Literally”

She sent a perplexed look towards Crowley for his comment, knowing that it was just his nature to make comments like that and didn’t truly deserve a telling off, flicked her wrist once more and summoned an armchair perfectly matched to the ones that Aziraphale and Crowley sat in as she shot daggers at the poor angel who currently looked very sorry, for both her and he.

“I really am sorry, dear. I panicked at the sight of you in such promiscuity, you really are classier than that, and let slip the first word that came to mind. It didn’t occur to me that you’d actually be burnt until it was too late”

“So, you’re telling me that I got discorporated because you’re a bloody prude?”

And then she was laughing, full and enchanting as she summoned a glass from his cabinet and filled it from the bottle that sat on the table. Sat in the wingback with a glass of red in her hand, she looked like desire personified, her dress skirt was tight and showing beautifully long legs that led up to the promise of so much more if she’d move only slightly to the left, her pretty breasts bound tight by the dress top with just enough cleavage to promise so much more. How in any level of heaven or hell was she classed as an angel when she looked far more tempting than any demon could?

“God Zira, have you seen what’s going on around you? Sex is the fashion and fashion is everything, I’m at my height now. You thought I was naughty then; you should see the things I’ve come up with now. Love is all around and that’s why they sent me back, to manage it and go to town”

She took a sip of the wine, both Aziraphale and Crowley shifting in their seat at the sight of her swallowing the liquid, a soft moan drifting from her lips and a dainty tongue flicking out to catch a droplet on her lip. She was feminine, always had been, and now they were beginning to realise that they were definitely male. Even without making the effort to summon the equipment. It was only an afterthought that Aziraphale realised she’d used a nickname for him, just like Crowley did.

“So… So, you were behind Woodstock, dear?”

That lovely little laugh again, airy and full of promise. She was looking at Aziraphale, her eyes seemed darker and so much more enticing as she traced the lip of her wine glass against her own lower lip. So delectable, how did heaven condone such behaviour from one of their own?

“Of course it was me, my sweet Zira, I’ve been so busy spreading love and the joy of sex these past few years, really takes it out of a girl, you know. It’s a miracle that I’ve found time to come and spend time with my favourite pair at all… I do love being around you, it’s so easy to let go”

She was on her feet once more, the content of her glass disappearing down her throat before placing the item down and extending her hands to both of them, a lovely smile on her lips. A spark lit in them both at her words, she liked them above any others. She actually wanted to spend time with them regardless of how busy she was in this decade. It didn’t even matter to her that one of the pair was a demon. She loved to be with them both, it felt so good.

“Come on, lovelies, I want to show you my new venture on earth… A little ruse to play human whilst I’m here”

They both took her hand, a jolt shooting through them at the smallest touch, feeling them both suddenly make the effort to form male parts as she led them from the little bookshop, Aziraphale still feeling slightly nervous. This didn’t feel like punishment for putting her to the stake by accident… What was she planning?

“Don’t worry, sweet angel… I’ll get my vengeance in a way more fitting for me. For now, I want to show you a world of fine cuisine and exquisite fun”


	2. Chapter 2

Aziraphale could still remember that night perfectly. The food had been incredible for him and Crowley had adored the entertainment, mostly because it was scantily dressed men and women serving them incredible strong cocktails and offering to go to private booths. Sophia had combined both their love for hedonism and made it into something very exclusive, the first of many chains it seemed as she spread throughout the country, as well as the world. She was rather proud of the maid cafes in Japan.

It wasn’t really surprising for either of them really. She was the angel of love and, if they’d learned one thing over the years, love took many forms and she embraced them all… except paedophilia, necrophilia and bestiality. The first two were just downright wrong and the second made no bloody sense as well as being wrong in her mind. When Crowley had told her that hell had caused those three, he’d actually worried she’d walk though hell flicking holy water at them all for tainting sex. Not that he’d blame her, even he couldn’t wrap his head around those three.

The biggest difference both Crowley and Aziraphale had noticed now was that Sophia didn’t stay away for too long anymore. In fact, neither had ever seen so much of her. She seemed there always to invite them to luscious dinners and, mostly for Crowley, exquisite entertainment. And, happily, she was always ready to drink inhuman amounts of alcohol with them. And she always loved to dance.

It was the early eighties. Aziraphale hadn’t changed his style much. Actually, he hadn’t chanced it in over one hundred years. He liked what he liked on himself. but Crowley And Sophia had, oh god they really had. Crowley clad in tight, black leather pants, loose tank top with a scarf and leather jacket. Sophia, oh sweet Sophia, tight white leather pants and a boob tube, power jacket with oversized shoulders and hair huge. Both looked like sex personified and Aziraphale could feel temptation rolling from them both. She oozed love, and he oozed lust. How the hell was an angel meant to resist such beings?

They were sat in one of her clubs, a private booth with prime viewing of the stage full of dancers that never really caught their eye when they could feel her close by, drinks flowing for both Aziraphale and Crowley without charge, the waiter saying it was on the house from the owner, both raising an eyebrow, knowing that Sophia owned this establishment. But where was the promiscuous angel? She’d yet to show her face, despite being close by and they’d already both finished three courses of divine food. Definitely Sophia’s work.

“Do you think she’ll join us? It feels frightfully strange being here without Sophia making herself known. I can usually hear her yelling at heaven from the entrance”

Crowley smirked at Aziraphale’s words, watching how the angel wrung his hands nervously, trying to avoid the eyes of the dancers who seemed keen to catch his attention. He had a point really, but it was nice to spend some alone time with this angel as well, Crowley did rather enjoy watching Aziraphale squirm. But it was far more entertaining when Sophia was helping him achieve the squirming. 

“Not sure… She’s here but she might be working. You know she likes to add the personal touch every now and then”

Crowley grinned at the thought. He liked her idea of the personal touch, dancing around a pole whilst customers got grabby with each other under the influence of her angelic intervention. There was a groan from behind them as both jumped in their seat and turned to find Sophia lounging languidly on the back of their booth, the panelling quite wide between the wall and their seating, allowing the woman to lay there with enough room for comfort. She looked almost feline as she arched her back beautifully, stretching herself and giving a soft sound of appreciation, not even realising that she wasn’t the only one feeling appreciation for the stretch.

“Not tonight darlings. Thought I’d take it easy and let the humans jump their own bones for a little while, have some me time and enjoy a pleasant evening with my lovelies”

Aziraphale smiled happily at her words, he did so love that both he and Crowley had been in her good books now for quite some time, it was a frightful thing indeed when she was upset or remotely peeved. He was still waiting for her vengeance for the witch burning but hoped to hold it off for as long as possible. Crowley raised a hand to trace a finger along a well-shaped thigh, seeing the colour raise in Aziraphale’s cheeks at the show of vague intimacy, knowing that the angel couldn’t take his eyes away from the sight as she simply sighed at the touch.

The moment stopped abruptly however as she moved to sit up fully, pulling her legs from Crowley’s touch, much to the demons annoyance. He liked working Aziraphale up like that, liked watching the well behaved angel seem to slip closer towards temptation. He liked the idea of exploring both angelic bodies as they explored him, very much liked the idea of having them both for himself and him alone, to hell with heaven and he’d happily tell hell where to shove it if it meant having his way with these two.

“I was enjoying that leg, pretty one”

His tone was teasing, but Aziraphale could sense the truth behind the demons words. Six thousand years had taught him to know when Crowley was hiding something or when Crowley really wanted something. Truth be told, he felt the same way. He liked to imagine of the three of them together in a blissful embrace. Not that he’d ever say it aloud, the thought was very un-angelic, the desire to trace fingers along Sophia’s lovely curves whilst he tasted Crowley’s lips against his own. Most certainly he’d fall for such behaviour.

“I’m sure you were, my sweet, but I do believe I’d like to move closer to the bar and drink myself into oblivion right now… No light petting involved”

There was a stiffness to her voice, the skin of her thigh tingling where the demon had touched, as she stood from her position on the back of the booth and more than a little grateful she’d chosen to wear a pant suit this evening, stepping down onto seating between them gracefully before climbing over the table, not really caring for the stares she was receiving from the other customers.

“What the hell are you all staring at! Out, now, private party starts now!”

There was thunder in her voice as the mortals seemed to scarper, both Aziraphale and Crowley knowing that they’d forget the fright by morning and be back the next evening. She was stalking towards the bar, irritated but not really knowing why as the poor barman shrunk back under her glare.

“That means you too, and the rest of the staff. Night off, full pay, go home”

He ran away as she went behind the bar, summoning three glasses and a bottle of her best scotch. Why did she feel so flustered all of a sudden? she’d not had a temper outburst like this in a decade, since the last time she’d bothered to speak with Gabriel. Still a total douchebag. She preferred to hand in her reports via angelic delivery these days. Write it all down, snap her fingers, drop it on Michael’s desk and bugger to them all.

“Are you all right, dear? You seem rather perplexed suddenly”

Aziraphale was frowning in concern, had Crowley’s touch made her uncomfortable? He hoped not, he rather liked spending time as a trio and the risk of that changing was something he couldn’t bare to think about. He didn’t much like change. Both he and Crowley accepted a glass, watching as she filled all three a little too much before taking a seat once more, turning on the seat slightly so that those lovely legs draped over Crowley’s lap and her back rested against Aziraphale’s chest, sipping delicately at her scotch as Crowley’s hand moved to her calf. That tingle spreading all over as she focused on keeping her composure.

“Nothing’s wrong, sugar, just a little tense. Got a lot on my mind”

And it was true she supposed. She’d been having a lot of thoughts on her mind lately, none of them innocent or remotely fitting for an angel of the lord. Sure, she’d made the effort on more occasions than she cared to remember, but she’d never actually partaken in anything remotely sexual herself, she’d never felt the desire to be that close to humans except to work some divine rapture or intervention. She just liked the idea of letting her favourite pair think that she was personally experienced in the ways of sex. Besides, there were too many draw backs to being physically involved with a human, she’d have to put even more energy into not letting her wings slip by accident and she couldn’t, quite literally, glow in the aftermath. No, far too much hassle to get intimate with mortals.

The problem was that she’d started feeling the urge to actually experience carnal pleasures, to feel hands tracing along more than just her thighs, to feel lips against her throat as her own hands explored the bodies of a certain pair, as well as to watch that pair enjoy each other as well. It would have been easier with these two, all of them immortal and more than accepting of a wing popping out every now and then. Crowley might feel a bit dazed by the glow of ethereal light in the come down moments, but he had shades, he’d be fine. 

Shame it couldn’t actually happen. Aziraphale was too much of a good angel to ever dream of participating with her, even though heaven didn’t have an issue with relations between angels, and Crowley… Well it was obvious what issue lay there, demons and angels were not meant to mix well at all, let alone get steamy with each other. They all ran enough risks with the time they spent together as it was, and heaven forbid either side ever discovered about Crowley and Aziraphale’s little work arrangement.

No, this was enough just to be with them she thought, the trio seeming to let their thoughts slide and throw themselves into the task of decimating the stock behind Sophia’s bar, falling into drunken rants and nonsensical debates about dolphins as they chose to ignore the problem at hand.


	3. Chapter 3

She moaned in bliss as talented hands ran down her bare shoulders, thumbs digging into the muscles beneath, a sting of delight following as fingers kneaded into the spot where wings would be in her true form, running further down and stopping just short of her hips before running back up. Naked as a new-born with only a towel to cover her waist. If she could think of anything close to heaven on earth, then this may have been it.

“Jeremy, has anyone ever told you that your hands are a miracle, I should thank the angel who blessed them”

The young man in question simply chuckled, not minding at all, she was rather eye-catching, and she was definitely paying him well for the massage, so much better being here than in his hometown. A more persistent pressure began to work against a particularly tense muscle at the point between her shoulders, the resulting groan possibly causing the whole of London to feel a moment of divine rapture. Heaven above that felt good.

“You really should watch how that power of yours gets released, you may cause another baby boom”

And, just like that, all the tension was back in every muscle as she smacked her head against the cushioned table top in exasperated annoyance. Why the HELL was he here? And where on earth had Jeremy gone?

“You really know how to ruin a good time don’t you”

Her face turned, scowling at the smiling face of Gabriel, hands still on her bare back and apparently not about to move either. With a sigh of resignation, she flicked her wrist, fully clothed in a three-piece women’s suit and knocking his hand away as she sat up and folded her arms over her chest.

“So now that you’ve ruined my mood, what do you want?”

“So rude to your superior, you should watch that pretty tongue of yours”

A well-shaped eyebrow arched at his words. Superior arsehole definitely. She kept that thought to herself however as she simply chose to purse her lips and send her best death glare at him. One day it would work she hoped. 

“Nice place you have here, I love all the white marble and leather…. It’s very you”

“And I’m sure you dropped down from your heavenly post just to praise my interior decorating skill. Get on with it Gabriel then leave so that I can get back to Jeremy and his miracle hands”

Still smiling at her, he made his way to her lovely new sofa. She’d replace it as soon as possible. He patted the seat next to him, but she walked past and towards her wine cabinet, a large chateauneuf-du-pape would make this visit easier to bear.

“I’ll have a small glass, sweet Sophia. Busy man and all, what with the Apocalypse on its way”

‘I really hate you’ she seethed mentally as she poured a second, smaller, glass for the divine douchbag. It dawned on her suddenly that he had said something rather important as she handed him the glass and sat on the opposite sofa, eyes fixed on him.

“And what is that supposed to mean?”

“Oh, apologies, the anti-Christ has been born and the big decider between heaven and hell is only a decade or so away. Best enjoy spreading love on earth while you can before returning to heaven once more, where you can share it with me instead”

Fuck. Was it really so soon, she’d thought she had another few decades at least? Fuck, fuck, fuck. She kept her face cool as she took a fairly large sip of wine before speaking in an icy tone. She’d mastered the art of resting-bitch face when it came to Gabriel. She’d hoped to make it a thing on earth but apparently there was no time for that now.

“Like hell I’ll be sharing anything with you. You’re not my type. I’d sooner stand in hellfire”

“Watch yourself, angel, I could cause you a lot of trouble for that comment, you wouldn’t enjoy falling”

‘You already cause me enough trouble by existing, asshat’ She thought irately, gulping down more of her wine and noticing that he’d finished his own glass and was fiddling with the stem. Bastard. Just leave if he’d said his piece. At least if she fell then she wouldn’t have to answer to this prick. Again, she reigned the thoughts in and instead chose her best smile, knowing it would win her every fight with Gabriel. Fucking mook.

“Now, Gabriel, who said anything about falling. You and I both know that I’m feisty, and I do so love our little spats. They keep me on my toes and I so crave such interactions, it gets so lonely down here. You know I can’t wait to spend eternity playing our little games after heaven has won. Now, I won’t keep you any longer, you’re going to be so busy with preparing heaven and now that I know it’s on the horizon, I’ll be getting into my best fighting shape also”

The words felt like ash in her mouth but still held that smile as she could all but see him preening his damned feathers at her words. Repeat: fucking mook. He was probably remembering her battle armour, nothing more than a bloody bikini with wings really. The only beings she wanted to spend eternity with were Aziraphale, Crowley and a never ending bottle of wine or scotch. Sex as well if one day possible. The earth being intact would be nice as well. Gabriel stood from his seat, a smug grin on his face as she took the wine glass from his hand and he took her other hand, placing a kiss upon it. Could she request a new hand from heaven? This one felt dirty.

“I knew you enjoyed my company really; I’d never see you fall dear, you’re far too much fun to hand over to hell”

He was gone in a flash and Sophia felt herself gag. Falling was looking like a very good option right now. She needed to get over to Aziraphale’s bookshop and let him know the update, hopefully Crowley would be there too with an arsenal of alcohol at their disposal. She needed it. And, for the life of her, she couldn’t think where Jeremy had gone.

***

*Somewhere in Glasgow*

Jeremy blinked; hadn’t he just been massaging the back of a beautiful red head with enchanting green eyes? Why was he stood in the middle of his old council estate?

“Hello?”

***

*Back with Sophia*

“Shit, fuck and shit again!”

She was running around her penthouse like a mad woman, the noise of the club below drifting upwards. She liked it here, she loved her clubs and, god, did she love her time spent with Aziraphale and Crowley. She didn’t want to spend eternity dodging the unwanted advances of Gabriel. The man had no understanding of consent. As an afterthought, if she could get through this, she’d make consent a major thing in society. Rape was the over-ride of hell and she would hit back with generations fighting for ACTUAL women’s rights, as well as LGBT rights.

She was outside in a flash, white leathers hugging nicely as she straddled the Yamaha bike and felt the engine roar between her thighs. Closest bloody thing she got to anything between her thighs it seemed. Fuck, she wished she’d actually had a taste of sex now. The world ending kind of made that a little more difficult to reach.

“Fuck the speed limit, I’m going super nova”

 

The bike crashed down outside the bookshop and Sophia all but threw herself from it as she stalked towards the door and pushed it open.

“We’re quite closed!”

Aziraphale’s prim voice echoed from the backroom, guiding Sophia towards the backroom and the incredible drunk pair, helmet held under her arm as she canted a hip to the right and swiped her hand across her face. Crowley, despite his drunken state, had to love the tightness of her leathers across her arse, really did wonders on the supple flesh beneath, not that he wouldn’t like to slap that lovely backside when it was bare.

“Are you too closed for me, my love, I’ve had quite the hellish night”

She could feel the change in the atmosphere. So charged, so exciting. But now wasn’t the time to finally break the veil she thought as she turned stern eyes on both.

“We’re never too closed for you pretty one… Come take a seat"

Crowley seemed to miss the atmosphere around her, Aziraphale too as he patted the seat beside him, more than happy to have the promiscuous little angel at his side. This was rather new for Aziraphale, he was usually a lot more reserved.

“Sober up”

Her words were a warning, she wouldn’t deal with the apocalypse with two drunken fools. Aziraphale turned to Crowley, not really feeling the situation as he muttered  
“I can’t deal with this when I’m drunk, I’m going to sober up”

“Me too”

Sophia watched in dismay as several bottle of wine refilled under both angel and demon’s effort to empty their bodies of alcohol, smacking their mouths in distaste at the aftereffects.

“Never tastes as good coming back up, does it?”

Her words were scathing, eying both before taking the seat that was always reserved just for her, retrieving a refreshed bottle and pouring the liquid once more into three glasses, the third miracled by Aziraphale, such a gentleman, she really did adore him. More men should be like him

“I’ve just spent a… lovely time with Gabriel”

“Oh my dear, are you alright. I know how he stresses you”

‘Oh Aziraphale, you sweet man’ she though as she took the sympathetic hand upon her knee and held it to her cheek. Her eyes flitted to Crowley, seeing the rage flaring in those lovely yellow eyes. This was why she loved her boys, one so caring and the other so protective, she kissed Aziraphale’s knuckle and sent a meaningful gaze towards Crowley.

“I’m fine, my lovelies. You don’t go millennia fighting the advances of Gabriel without picking up tips on how to deflect him… Tell me you know of the apocalypse; tell me you have a plan”

She pressed into Aziraphale, she loved his plush body, loved how it welcomed her in as she clutched to his side, cuddling to his chest as he stroked a hand through her hair. Aziraphale, for his part, sent a bewildered look at Crowley, Sophia had never clung to him for comfort before. He liked it, but god it felt strange knowing that THEIR feisty angel was scared.

“We... have a plan, pretty one, just leave it to us”

Crowley’s voice was by her ear as she clung to Aziraphale, his words offering confidence as Aziraphale stroked her hair, offering comfort. She listened to their plan… Somehow, Crowley in a skirt and heels sounded like a lot of fun.

“Please… Do what you can… I don’t want eternity without you both”

That night, they felt the fear of love, fear of her being stolen from them when they were only just coming to terms with all their feelings. The apocalypse couldn’t happen, not when they loved the earth and each other like they did. Sophia’s voice, soft as it was, broke the atmosphere.

“I was having such a good night under Jeremy’s hands too”

Suddenly both Aziraphale and Crowley were forced to share a glance. Who, on any plane of heaven or hell, was Jeremy and where the fuck had his hands been?


	4. Chapter 4

She rather liked Crowley’s penthouse. It was much like her own except in black and grey… With a big golden throne and a lot of, incredibly terrified, houseplants. She didn’t have a big golden throne, but she did have a lot of houseplants of her own, none of them were terrified of her like these plants were of Crowley. She didn’t threaten hers or send sickly plants down a waste disposal unit, she preferred to shower hers with love and affection. It was her job after all. She made a quick note in the back of her mind to never get Crowley any plants, poor things, as she lounged in the throne and felt her right eye twitch slightly at the sight before her.

“You’ve watched Mary Poppins FAR too many times, Crowley. I think you need an intervention if you think nannies still dress like that…. And don’t get me started on you, Zira”

Both men bristled with indignation, they had put a lot of thought into these outfits. Crowley felt he looked rather fetching in his skirts and tight bodice. Hell, he was even wearing a bra stuffed with socks. He didn’t want to conjure breasts, uncomfortable enough just wearing the bra. He could see why so many women had burnt them in the late sixties. And then there was Aziraphale, Sophia really didn’t know how he’d come up with the outfit, did he really think ANYONE dressed like that anymore? it was even more outdated than his usual wardrobe, the scraggy facial hair and reddened cheeks made him look like a degenerate farmer… And he was chewing on a long bit of reed. 

“Zira, sweetie, you look like you were thrown back into medieval England and dragged backwards through a bush in the clothes of the first person you saw. And that person was clearly a drunken farmer who’d never owned a comb”

Aziraphale gave a huff of dissatisfaction at her choice of words. He thought he looked very amiable, the very effect he was going for. He was meant to look like a kindly old gentleman that everyone thought was a sweetheart. Folding his arms and vanishing the disguise away in favour of his normal appearance, he quirked an eyebrow at the angel in front of him.

“At least we’ve put some thought into our appearances, you haven’t even changed a single feature to blend with your role of a maid, my dear”

“Oh, I’m sorry, did you think I was going to go full widow Twankey to fit with your ridiculous idea of what a maid looks like?” 

Crowley watched as the two bickered between them, reverting back to his own preferred form as Aziraphale insisted adamantly that maids should be properly covered and respectable young ladies, whilst Sophia… In not so gentle words… told him to shove his opinion up a certain orifice and that she’d look exactly as she always did. Besides, she’d likely be given a work uniform anyway. 

“I think French is the best way to go personally”

Oh, if looks could kill then Crowley would have been discorporated on the spot. Green and blue eyes shot daggers as he chose to grin widely, happy just to imagine a French maids outfit on Sophia and a nice, well-tailored butlers outfit on Aziraphale. Definitely sounded like fun to him.

Sophia and Aziraphale returned to simply staring each other down, both too stubborn in their arguments and Crowley could swear he could taste the tension, see the divine sparks flying as Sophia gave a groan and threw her hands into the air, a victory for Aziraphale it seemed.

“Fine! No leather pants and boob tubes, I’ll look respectable. But I am not going full servant girl to satisfy the fact that you are stuck in a time loop”

With an overly dramatic flourish of her hand and a few more choice words about Aziraphale getting with the times, the outfit had changed from tight leathers and a tank top to a prim and respectable, red tartan, knee length style skirt and a simple white blouse, sensible kitten heels instead of the stilettoes and hair held up in ponytail rather than it’s usual down and swept back fashion. She also sported a respectable looking pair of reading glasses.

She glared as Crowley sniggered, reminded of a secretary and his imagination going quickly to related fantasies. Aziraphale felt rather pleased with his victory also, he really did like tartan and even more so on Sophia.

“Thank you, my dear. You look lovely, perhaps you will consider this change of style on a more permanent basis?”

“Honest to god, I will wash your mouth out with soap if you suggest that ever again”

***

*Five years later*

The three sat in Aziraphale’s bookshop, the days events of playing roles and helping to raise young Warlock in the ways of heaven and hell were proving to be, well, more than a little testing for the three immortals. Aziraphale clutched to the glass of scotch in his hands like a life line, Crowley had buried himself under every blanket in the building, the only noise to be heard from him the gulps of his own drink, and Sophia simply lay with her face flat on the table, turned to the right and staring at the untouched liquid in her own glass as her shoulders slumped wearily.

“he kicked a pigeon today”

“He wouldn’t stop singing ‘This little light of mine’… really badly at that”

Aziraphale felt a little offended at that. He was quite fond of that song and he’d been the one to teach it to the boy. Sophia just groaned, shifting slightly so her chin rested on the surface as she miracled a straw long enough from her drink so that she wouldn’t have to move.

“He followed me for three hours, asking my favourite colour, my favourite crisp flavour, as well as a thousand other things and then if I’d play house with him and I’d play as his wife and make him ham sandwiches on demand”

A pair of yellow, reptilian eyes peered out from under the blanket fortress, a spark of mischief returning to them briefly as Aziraphale miracled them all a top up.

“Play house with me instead, I can think of much more fun things to do than make sandwiches”

Both angels rolled their eyes at the demon before green and blue eyes both sparked with their own mischief and began humming in unison, voices lovely and angelic as they rose from their seats and stalked towards Crowley, who now wished he’d stayed under the damned blankets and kept his mouth on his drink instead.

“This Little Light Of Mine,  
I'm gonna let it shine,  
This Little Light Of Mine,  
I'm gonna let it shine,  
This Little Light Of Mine,  
Yes, I'm gonna let it shine,  
Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine”

Crowley hissed as his ears almost burnt with the flow of the lyrics, he really did hate that song. Hands began to pull the blankets from his face, scowling at the smiling angel’s who continued to sing in overly sweet voices, enjoying their torment of the demon. Two pairs of lips drifted closer to his ears, temptingly close if not for the poison seeping from them.

“The light that shines is the light of love,  
Lights the darkness from above,  
It shines on you and it shines on me,  
and it shows what the light of love can do.  
I'm gonna shine my light both far and near,  
I'm gonna shine mine light bright and clear,  
where there's a dark corner in this land  
I'm gonna let my little light shine.”

Sophia cracked first, falling backwards and onto her rump as she clutched at her sides and laughed for what felt like the first time in five years, Aziraphale choosing to keep his dignity as he stifled his own chuckle behind a well-manicured hand as Crowley fully resurfaced and grumbled bitterly about how his ears felt sore.

When they thought about it, the past five years hadn’t been so bad really. They’d spent most of it together after all, and that was always worth putting up with the anti-Christ for. They were doing well it seemed, the child was a mix of both heaven and hell, they had kept their activities a secret from their respective superiors and Sophia was certain that they had a nice long future ahead of them. The three got comfortable on the sofa, drinks in hand with Sophia in her usual spot between both demon and angel, feet draped over one lap and back pressed nicely into the chest of another as the sound of ‘the golden girls’ rang from the modest television set that Aziraphale had miracled for these little occasions.


	5. Chapter 5

The steam furled up into the humid air of the decadent bathroom, tiled in white marble with surfaces to match, the soothing notes of the Für Elise drifting to her ears as she sunk a little deeper into the water, surrounded by bubbles and very a nice bottle of pink champagne beside the over-sized sunken bath.

She liked to do this, there was nothing wrong with a little pampering when she’d just spent nearly eleven years running around after a total brat. She was so glad that she’d finally gotten away from him, almost two months ago. Now, don’t get her wrong, Sophia liked children, she really did. But Warlock was just an entitled brat who was far too used to getting his own way. A soft sigh passed her lips as she took in the room around her, enjoying the scent of vanilla and sandalwood from her bath salts and crème. Surely, she could be permitted one more, small, luxury.

Her feathers unfurled around her, tickling the surface of the bath water as she moved to preen a few loose feathers, pretending that she didn’t feel a hint of embarrassment at how long it had been seen she’d last done some maintenance. The delicate silver feathers felt soft to her touch and she frowned slightly. It was better to have a trusted partner do this really, someone who could reach the feathers right at her shoulders. She couldn’t really ask her favourite pair; Crowley would probably get too excited and get rough with the feathers and Aziraphale would likely faint at the request for something so intimate.

“I would be more than happy to help with that”

She didn’t quite jump at the unwelcome voice; she was starting to get used to his surprise visits by this point. This was the third time this month and she was more than a little sick of it. She forced a pretty smile upon her lips, turning in the water to fold her arms over the tiled floor that surrounded the bath, completely covering any glimpse of her breasts and being doubly sure that her naked backside was covered by bubbles as well. Her wings remained out, she needed to let them breath”

“Gabriel, you have a bad habit of appearing when I’m in a good mood and ruining it very quickly. I’m starting to think you enjoy pissing me off”

She fought the urge to put more distance between them as he came to seat himself beside the bath, a hand running over the feathers of her wings, mistaking the shudder that ran through her as anything good. She felt nausea at the touch. Could you get new wings in heaven? She vanished them away, suddenly desiring to be away from the rapidly cooling bath and fully dressed. Easy enough as she summoned a white summer dress fitting for the august heat that London seemed to be experiencing at the time and left the bath, empty and herself completely dry.

“What can I say, my dear, I like the change of pace. Heaven is rather boring without you there”

‘I’m sure it is… Purple eyed prick’. She ignored the statement and headed towards her living room, choosing to sit in the armchair and cancel out any chance he had of sitting close to her, eyes fixed on him as he helped himself to two glasses and summoned the pink champagne left behind in the bathroom, pouring them both a glass.

“But that will change soon. Afterall, the hell hound has found and been named by the boy and you’ll be back in heaven very soon”

Sophia forgot to breath. How? Hadn’t their intervention worked? Surely Crowley and Aziraphale would have told her if the dog had turned up at the brats birthday party? Had those years of helping to raise the boy been for nothing? She took a swig from her glass as her mind raced and Gabriel seemed more than happy to listen to the sound of his own voice.

“Of course, heaven will win the war and we’ll have eternity to tend to each other’s wings… And so much more”

There was a distinct lack of taste about that suggestion, the nausea in her stomach becoming stronger at the lewd stare he was giving her. ‘Go hug a land mine’ she thought angrily, still focusing on her champagne, willing the glass full once more as soon as it ran dry, to avoid any actual acknowledgement of the being before her.

A hand clasped her knee and suddenly it was impossible to focus only on the champagne. The king of all douches had summoned an armchair beside her own and was now far too close for comfort as he seemed to be trying to get even closer, clinking his champagne glass to her own as if they were somehow celebrating something remotely good.

“We could recreate old Rome… You remember, when the humans caught a glimpse of you in all your glory by mistake and thought you were their pagan goddess. What was her name again?”

“Venus”

She wanted to claw his face off, discorporate him and hide in a different galaxy. He was getting closer, inhaling the scent of her hair as she cringed in disgust. She didn’t mind when Crowley did it, the silly demon thought she didn’t notice him doing it and she found it rather sweet when he’d give a little huff of pleasure, not that she’d ever tell him she thought he was sweet. He’d be mortified at being discovered.

“Ah yes. The goddess of love, sex, beauty and fertility. At least they got that bit right, you could make even the most prudish angel make an effort. You’ve got me making a, rather large, effort after all”

With those words and his advances to actually press his body to her own, she was tapping out. This was well above her pay grade and she was done playing games. A foot planted itself in his stomach and she forced him away, towering over him as she stood, a grin that was entirely teeth on her face as anger flared deep in her eyes. Fuck it, falling was definitely better than being this pricks fuck toy for eternity.

“Easy tiger, I’m not playing Venus for anyone, especially not you, unless I choose too willingly. Now pick yourself up and leave. I have shit to do”

The rough treatment seemed to do little in dampening Gabriel’s mood however as the archangel picked himself up and advanced on her once more, nothing in his eyes hinted at her having the opportunity to consent to what he wanted from her. Shit, sure she talked a good game, but he was still a rank higher than her. She was a Seraphim and whilst that could pack a punch, he could pack a harder one. In a last ditch attempt, she mustered all of her strength and screamed, releasing it in one huge burst. The skyscraper she called her home began to shudder, glass shattering and the supporting beams dissolving to nothing as the force of her natural state forced Gabriel back slightly, the floors beginning to crumble. She could feel the life forces of the humans within the floors below begin to shift and vanish, her added efforts sending them elsewhere to avoid casualties as she felt herself being shifted.

“You’ll discorporate yourself with that level of power! Be a good girl and do as your told!”

“Go fuck yourself!”

Gabriel’s roar filled the very atmosphere as he made to grab her once more. Only issue was that there was nothing to take hold of. Purple eyes filled with malicious intent scanned for any sign but there was nothing, not even a feather as he manifested himself from the building and watched it crash like an oversized Jenga tower. No signs of life inside or within the immediate danger zone he mused, seemed even Sophia, with all her vicious little quirks, couldn’t put her love of humanity aside for the sake of her own skin.

*Somewhere just outside of London*

Her back hit hard against the ground with a painful thud, her groan startling the birds as she tried to push herself up and figure out what had just happened. She should have been discorporated, she could feel her celestial energy running at an all time low as she chose to just fall back against the grass and fallen leaves. She couldn’t even summon her wings in this state, there was no hope of manifesting in either of Crowley or Aziraphale’s places. There were trees all around her, a forest in the perfect prime of the season and the weather was impeccable for august. Strange really considering the rest of England’s climate and foliage could never make up its bloody mind usually.

“Are you alright!”

A voice, a young boys voice, drifted over the winds to her ears but she felt too weak to actually try and answer it, or even move her head to look as a number of running feet came towards her. Three boys and a girl, all seeming very worried as they took both her arms and she groaned at being forced to move.

“We heard something like lightning hitting and ran over here, never thought we’d find a person though. Are you ok? Can you walk?”

It took more effort than she would have liked to remain sat up as she observed the children around her. A girl, black hair held up in a messy ponytail and a confident and indomitable gleam in her eyes. A boy with glasses and an air about him that better suited a man in his mid-forties working as a charted accountant. Another boy, shirt covered in crisp crumbs and a few stray leaves stuck in his hair, hair black and lanky against very pale skin. And then there was the final boy, he was clearly the leader of this little gang, his eyes fixed quite firmly on her also as they both seemed to weigh each other up. Nothing seemed to be jumping out about him, almost like a barrier protected him. It hit her like a sack of bricks to her face as she found the strength to speak, not failing to notice the little dog with the flipped over ear trying to give her the actual evil eye. Well hell, who’d have thought a hell hound could be so bloody cute.

“I don’t think I can… Rough day at the office, you know.”

She watched as they bolted off, the leader shouting that he’d get help as she fell back down and sent a confused look to the sky. If she was right, then why the hell was the anti-Christ helping her and, more importantly, how had she landed right in his bloody playing grounds?

“Sophia… Angel of love”

She jumped inwardly at the voice within her own mind, feeling the divine touch as she tried and failed miserably to get back up slightly.

“Yes, my lord?”

“Your role is not yet over… Trials lay ahead”

The voice was gone as quickly as it had come, leaving Sophia flat on her back with a look on her face like someone had just thrown ice water over her. She seemed to loose track of time, stuck in the musings of her own mind, as much larger hands began to lift her from the ground and helped her into the back of an old Morris Minor, the car trundling to a little village near the forest and the face of a kindly gentleman assuring her that his wife had put the kettle on. A young boys face looking at her with concern from the front passenger seat a stark reminder that she was, in fact, in the anti-Christ’s home town.

‘Shiiiiiiittttt’ She thought before closing her eyes and, for the first time ever, drifting into sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

Crowley snarled as the other end of the line rang out once more, Aziraphale fidgeting as his nerves began to reach an all new height, even for him. Sophia had never failed to answer her phone before, especially not to them. What was happening?

“I’m sure she’s just busy keeping heaven off our backs, dear boy. Nothing to worry about, nothing at all”

Even Aziraphale couldn’t believe that, she’d have called back by now to pick up the missed calls. They were bolting through the Oxfordshire countryside towards where Crowley remembered dropping the child off, vaguely. It wasn’t like he’d thought to remember the damned place perfectly encase of a monumental FUCK UP.

“You and I both know that’s bollocks… I can feel it, something’s wrong. When has she ever not answered her phone or called back?”

Aziraphale began to wring his hands harder, feeling the impending dread filling him. Of course he could feel it. All angel’s could sense each other, regardless of distance and he’d always rather enjoyed being able to sense Sophia. It was like having constant access to your favourite wine. But now there was nothing, only as flickering presence that couldn’t be pinned down. He jumped slightly as a slender hand took hold of his own and yellow eyes stared at him through the top of sunglasses.

“We’ll find her, angel, I promise, we always do… She’s just hiding… Maybe from Gabriel”

Aziraphale could have melted into those words, so uncharacteristically soothing for a demon but so fitting for Crowley. He was nothing like the rest of the rabble in hell. He was special and not completely fallen to darkness. 

“I’m sure you’re right, dear boy… Gabriel most likely came on too strong”

They squeezed each other’s hand in a final attempt at comfort, a scowl on Crowley’s face and Aziraphale’s lips pursed in distaste at the mere thought of Gabriel being too forward with THEIR Sophia.

*Just outside of London*

Sophia blinked down at the mug in her hand, confused beyond belief as she desperately tried to test her own strength, trying to turn the tea into something far stronger with no success. Her muscle’s ached, her grace was drastically weakened, and the anti-Christ was staring at her like he was trying to read her very soul. His name was Adam Young apparently.

“You were out cold for hours… What happened? You can tell me, I’m a good listener”

How was this the boy who would destroy the world? He seemed so sweet and his dog barely held the trace of a hell hound anymore as he lay by his masters side, head on his front paws and big eyes staring at her with worry. Probably scared she’d smite him. Sophia smiled, she wasn’t strong enough to smite anything, let alone a cute little lapdog. 

“I… I had a run in with someone who wanted to hurt me… A man I work with. I’m lucky to have escaped with my life”

It wasn’t a lie. Gabriel was more than capable of causing her pain… in many ways. She swiped at her eyes, surprised as the dampness began to well thicker within the emerald orbs and tears finally broke through, she tried her hardest not to cry, failing as a chocked sob broke free. Without the adrenaline of trying to escape and the shock of being rescued from her own suicide mission by god herself, the fear that had secretly gripped Sophia finally broke and she snivelled, taking a weak sip of the tea. It was almost as good as Aziraphale’s. The thought only made her tears fall harder as he put the mug down on the table and covered her face with her hands. She wanted her boys here with her now more than ever.

Adam felt pain at the sight of her tears. He couldn’t quite place it, but he felt that this woman should never be brought to tears, like her very existence was meant to bring joy and the idea of her being in pain was just wrong. But maybe it was just that she seemed like such a nice woman, she reminded him of the old pictures he’d seen in his History classes in school, just like the roman goddess Venus, even the Greek goddess Aphrodite. He carefully took a seat beside her, Dog letting a little whine escape as Adam placed a hand on her shoulder, feeling a warmth spread as she continued to sob. No, someone like her shouldn’t be made to cry.

“You just tell me who he is and me and the Them will get him for you. No one should ever upset someone as much as he’s upset you”

She laughed weakly as she looked at him through bleary eyes, taking in the confident smile and the way he seemed to just know that he could do anything, without actually realising it at the same time. She placed a hand on the one that held her shoulder, her head drooping as she spoke.

“I’m sure you would, Adam. I’m sure you would”

She dropped a hand down to Dog’s level, watching as the little hell hound sniffed warily before nuzzling his head into the offered hand happily, a little more of hell leaving his system as she scratched his ear perfectly.

“You should come with me to meet the gang in the forest around Tadfield. Always makes me feel better when I feel down and I’m sure Pepper, wensleydale and Brian would be happy to see you’re on your feet”

Trust a child to come up with such an innocent cure to a complicated problem. This was why Sophia loved children. They could always see a light at the end of the tunnel, no matter how dark.

“I think I’d like to meet them too… My little saviours”

She followed them from the house, her once white summer dress now stained with the leaves and earth she’d fallen upon fluttering behind her as she ran behind them. Adam and Dog chasing each other happily, just like a little boy and his dog should, shouting back to her as she tried to keep up. How could such a sweet boy be such a bad omen for the world? It was Tuesday, and the world seemed strangely perfect to Sophia as she ran behind the boy and his dog.

***

*The former headquarters of the chattering nuns*

Gun shot could be heard from all sides of the outer perimeter as Crowley and Aziraphale made their way through the manor’s corridors, Aziraphale feeling horrified as Crowley happily stated that he’d given the human’s what they wanted.

“They wanted real guns… I just gave them what they wanted!”

Crowley felt pretty chipper about his little gift. After all, humans could be far worse than demons ever could be. They didn’t have to go around murdering each other, they made that choice themselves. Aziraphale squeaked in protest, causing Crowley to stop in his tracks and turn to the frightened, not so little, angel.

“They’re murdering each other you mean!”

Crowley felt a pang of guilt, a feeling that left a sour taste in his mouth, knowing that one of his favourite angels was panicking because of his actions, discretely flicking his wrist and creating a barrier around any human that may be hit and reviving and human that had already been hit.

“Don’t get your feathers in a knot. They’ll all find… miraculous… escapes”

Crowley was thankful really that his higher ups didn’t keep track of his demonic miracles, he’d be in a lot of holy water if they did. Aziraphale flushed at the kindness, knowing it to be only that, as he made the effort to get closer to the demon, his words a whisper in Crowley’s ear.

“You know, I always thought that, deep down, you were a nice person re…”

Crowley didn’t let him finish the statement, not wanting to admit it to himself and also not wanting it to drift down to his superiors, as he forced the hedonistic angel up against the wall, their lips only a breath away from touching and fighting everything in himself not to simply seal those lips.

“Don’t say nice. Nice is a four letter word. I am never nice”

He could feel his body manifest an effort already half saluted at the mere touch of this angel pressed against him, gloating slightly at the feel of the angel making the same effort unknowingly as he hissed once more in his ear.

“I’ll sssshow you one day”

He lost control for a moment, letting his serpent tongue slip as he ground his hips down against the shorter man’s own semi hard erection, enjoying how the angel shivered and gave a little whimper. If they could avoid this damned apocalypse, he’d have them both whimpering and writhing beneath his touch.

“Sorry to break up an intimate moment gentleman”

Crowley forced himself away from Aziraphale like he had just been drenched in holy water, eyes meeting with a woman that struck a certain chord in his mind just as it struck the same chord within her own mind.

“Satan preserve us, it’s mister Crowley!”

***

*Somewhere in the forests of Tadfield*

Sophia couldn’t remember the last time she’d been surrounded by the laughter of children, their games or the nonsensical chatter they came out with, but she knew she’d never felt so welcomed before personally. Of course she’d been around this sort of feeling, but only as an unseen entity, not really feeling it for herself. It felt like her whole being was being fuelled with love as Adam brought her into his little clearing, his friends instantly gathering around her as questions were fired her way and, for the eternity of her, she couldn’t fight the smile that broke on her face.

“Are you ok? You looked awfully tired when we found you”

Wensleydale. The little one destined for accountancy and the one who really needed to learn to embrace his youth while he had it.

“I feel much better, thank you for asking”

The bespectacled boy flushed at her open acknowledgement of him, he’d never thought someone so pretty would acknowledge him. Sophia caught this notion and, once her power was back to normal, would make sure he met a lovely girl who appreciated a man with his head on his shoulders and a heart full of love just for that one special girl.

“Your dress is stained. I could ask my mum if you could borrow one of the dresses she doesn’t wear anymore?”

Brian, the one who always seemed covered in crumbs and always had a goofy smile on his lips as he tried to brush the crumbs away. Sophia made a mental note for him to meet a woman who was house proud and liked to keep him looking his best, whilst loving the fact that he was completely hopeless.

“If your mother is ok with it, I’d really appreciate that”

“You can stay at my house if you don’t have a place to stay? I already told my mum and she said she’d never let a fellow woman be on the streets”

Pepper. The budding women’s advocate and mother to future generations that Sophia promised to help build into fighters for justice and love. She smiled very fondly on Pepper; she was a girl after her own heart. Sophia would see it that, if Pepper whose to fight for a course, she’d have the power of love behind her.

“Don’t worry, dear lady, I’m going to book a room at the local B&B, get my head together for a day or two before going home”

Pepper beamed at her, happy that someone hadn’t referred to her as ‘little girl’ for once and given her a respectable title for her gender. Sophia patted her dress pocket gently, relieved that her purse was always summoned with each outfit, pulling said wallet out, checking the black card that was fully thanks to business deals throughout the past two decades and flashing an award winning smile as she spoke.

“So my heroes, who would like ice-cream as a thank you?”

Three voices called around her in agreement, three sets of hands pulled her away towards the local shop. One set of eyes followed her leaving amongst his friends, noting that she was planning to leave and deciding that he didn’t want her too. He rather liked the presence of Sophia in their little town.


	7. Chapter 7

Crowley thumped his fist against the steering wheel as they hurtled away from the old monastery. Not only had they spent eleven years baby sitting the wrong bloody child, but any document that may have been used to track the real anti-Christ had gone up in smoke straight after the birth!

“Bloody Hastur. Just like him to do something like this, probably thought he was being clever! Bastard”

Aziraphale winced as the demon snarled and cursed at the unfortunate development. He had really hoped that they’d find at least some written document to point them towards the missing child. And they still hadn’t heard from Sophia, not even a quick ‘one bell’, as Crowley called it, to at least confirm that she was ok. He could feel his nerves rising once more, un-helped by the added tension between himself and Crowley after their little ‘encounter’ back at the manor. Aziraphale had often found himself considering what it would be like to share such intimacy with the demon and fellow angel. He’d always thought it would be tender and slow, the three of them tracing hands and whispering sweet nothings as bodies met in the oldest dance, maybe because he was an angel and he thought that sex was only meant to be like that. He was starting to wish he’d paid a little more attention to some of Sophia’s masterpieces in the art of sexuality.

The incident had made his heart pound, felt weak beneath the demon’s touch as he hissed in his ear with the promise of more. He had wanted it, much to his own amazement, had craved more of the same rough treatment. It had made him feel desired, a sin for any angel, and he had liked it. He should have known that Crowley would not be a gentle lover. He shivered at the thought of what could have happened if only that woman hadn’t appeared when she did, a flush coming to his face and praying that Crowley would not look over at him as he tried to calm the effort beginning to manifest in his trousers. No such luck.

“Filthy little angel”

Aziraphale could have discorporated on the spot as the Bentley was swung into a lay by on the side of the road, his eyes stealing a quick glance at Crowley as the demon smiled at him, devious as his own reptilian eyes lingered on the growing tent of the angels trousers. The blond bit his lip and tried to look away, embarrassed at his own lack of control, only to have slender fingers grip his chin and force their eyes to meet.

“You enjoyed being pinned to that wall. Liked the feel of me pressed so close”

Crowley was beginning to creep closer, causing Aziraphale to press back into the car door with no escape as the demon moved his lips towards his throat, a talented forked tongue tracing a hot trail along his racing pulse point and an equally talented hand tracing along the plump flesh of his thigh, teasingly close to the source of his immediate need but never truly touching as hissed words filled his ear.

“I could have made you feel sssssoooo good, angel. If the nun hadn’t interrupted ussss. Would you like that angel? Take you against that wall, begging for more while I take my time enjoying that lovely arse of yourssss, watch you fall apart when I wrap my hand around your cock and sssstroke you to the rhythm of my thrusts”

Crowley watched as the angel began to writhe under his wandering hand, the way his cheeks flushed, and his pupils dilated enough to tell the demon that his favourite hedonist was rather enjoying himself, little gasps breaking from those lips as Crowley’s fingers grazed along his arousal, enjoying the whimper that broke free as those fingers began to lower the zipper.

“Please… Crowley, someone… Someone may see us. And what of Sophia?”

Aziraphale’s tongue felt too large in his mouth as he was pulled free from his trousers, a hand stroking him teasingly as the angel arched into the touch, crying out as a thumb massaged the slit, smearing pre-cum along the shaft, the demon lowering his lips to place a surprisingly gentle kiss to the tip.

“No one is going to see us, angel. And don’t worry, we’ll find our lovely little renegade, and when we do, and all of this anti-Christ business is over… I won’t be letting either of you leave my bed for a decade”

If Aziraphale had been able to form a sentence as the heat of Crowley’s mouth engulfed him to the root, tongue dancing along the underside of his cock and swirling slowly along the head, sucking with purposeful pressure, yellow eyes looking up at him mischievously, he would have told him that locking them away in his bedroom was quite impossible. They had their businesses to run after all. As it was, he could only clutch at soft auburn locks and screw his eyes shut as the coil began to tighten within his stomach and the only word he could form was the demons name, called like a mantra as the devious creature began to hum against the sensitive flesh and Aziraphale lost himself to the sensation completely, spilling down the demons throat as he trembled with the aftermath of his first release. He felt like jelly as Crowley pulled away, a finger tracing along his lips to swipe a bead of the angels cum, offering the digit to the angel and purring as lips wrapped around it, sucking softly and whimpering at the taste of himself before Crowley pulled away completely.

“Like I said, filthy little angel.”

Aziraphale could only give a halfhearted moan of protest as Crowley willed him back into a respectable state of dress as he placed a heated kiss against his lips. He was fighting against his own raging hard-on, but he could wait. It was enough to know that he had satisfied the angel. He was not a selfish lover, far from it, and he would get his own reward once they were all back together and not fearing the end of the world. 

The demon took one last look at the angel, a smile tugging upon his lip at how he still flushed as Crowley pulled the Bentley back onto the road and began to race down the deserted country lanes once more. Go… Sat… someone, he’d waited millennia to do something like that to his lovely, prudish, angel, to see him writhe beneath his touch and give in to desire as well as he gave into gluttony. It wasn’t the ideal place, and they were missing a third play mate, but the taste of Aziraphale lingering on his tongue was enough to sustain him till he could truly enjoy exploring the realms of pleasure with either angel. He’d wanted this for too long to go back now, millennia of fantasising and the impending end of the world could really put things into perspective.

“Did you mean it, Crowley? Will we all be together once this is over?”

“Oh angel, when this is all over, you’ll both forget what it was like without me devouring your bodies… We’ll fix this, angel, I promise”

He flicked on the radio to offer them some background music as they flew through the countryside, knowing that Aziraphale would prefer Classic FM over Crowley’s usual choice of Kerrang! Radio. The soothing notes of Mozart’s Violin Sonata in G Major filling the car as Aziraphale pretended to conduct the orchestra with his fingers, humming happily to the music as Crowley stole little glances at the man beside him, warmth bubbling in his chest as he tried to fight the feeling of affection down half-halfheartedly, it really wasn’t very demonic of him to feel this way.

THUD

The car came to a screeching halt as Aziraphale was forced from his happy little trance and Crowley scowled at the offensive object that had broken the tranquillity of the moment.

“You’ve hit someone!”

Crowley gave an indignant sniff at the accusation, turning the engine off as he spoke.

“No, correction: someone hit me”

Aziraphale rolled his eyes at the demon, completely out of his blissful state as he jumped from the car and trotted around to see what, or who, may have been struck by the old Bentley, snapping his fingers without thinking twice.

“Let there be light”

“How the bloody hell did you do that?”

A voice drifted up from the embankments at the side of the road, clearly dazed by the accident and most certainly female, a mussed up head of brown hair turning to try and see but failing as Crowley snapped his own fingers and sent a pointed look towards the angel, who ignored him in favour of helping the woman.

***

*Tadfield, the local pub*

“Read ‘em and weep gents, royal flush”

The groan around the room only made her smug grin widen as she waved at the barman for another round before pulling the chips towards her. It wasn’t like they were playing for money after all, just a cheerful game of poker in the local pub. And besides, she needed to test if she was getting her strength back.

“You’ve got the luck of the devil, Sophia”

With an amused chuckle, she cocked a grin at the man beside her, Robert if she remembered his name right.

“You could call it that… Now, who’s ready for another round?”

She took a moment to look around the little pub as another of the group of players began to reshuffle the cards, Timothy, the one who had invited her to play when she’d been sat on her own at the bar feeling sorry for herself. There were hundreds of pubs in London, she’d been to nearly all of them over the decades, but none of them seemed to hold the same charm as this one. It felt peaceful, like it had never known a bar fight in its life, and the people were all friendly to the young woman who’d arrived under mysterious circumstances, none questioning her identity when she told them her name was Sophia Agra, the surname had been made up on the spot, she’d never used one before now but she liked it.

It was strange really, she thought as she looked at her new cards and decided to play fair for this round, satisfied that her strength was slowly returning. She knew that she needed to get back to London and let both Crowley and Aziraphale know what she had discovered now that she was feeling better, but she couldn’t bring herself to leave. Almost like something was holding her to the village and blocking any final decision from being made. She quite liked it here really, she’d always stayed in the big cities of the world, but maybe it was time to give the countryside a chance? And the amount of love surrounding this village was surely the reason she was getting stronger by the hour; it could only be a good thing. Right?

***

*In the back of the Bentley*

“My bike didn’t have gears”

Anathema couldn’t help but keep stealing glances at her bike, latched to the back of the car on tartan straps and her collection of belongings scattered on the back seat beside her as Crowley sent an exasperated look towards the angel who simply gave an awkward little chuckle and whispered in a mock sing-song voice.

“Oh lord heal this bike”

“I got carried away”

Anathema couldn’t really focus on the strange pair or their whispering, clutching the back of Aziraphale’s seat and pointing at where she needed to be dropped off, eager to get out of the car and away from the strange pair. She had to get back to her work.

She blinked as she stepped out of the car, Aziraphale holding the door open for her like the perfect gent he was as Crowley scowled. It wasn’t right for demons to go around helping people, he’d have his arse handed to him if they found out at head office.

“Oh look, you were right, no gears”

Anathema blinked in surprise; eyes locked on the bike that rested against the fence of her cottage. She hadn’t seen either of the two men take it from the rack, yet there it stood, in perfect condition.

“Come on angel”

She watched as the vintage dressed gentleman climbed back into the car and it sped off once more without a second thought to her. Definitely a strange pair she thought as she made her way into the cottage.

It was only minutes later that she realised the monumental cock up that had taken place and rushed once more from the cottage and onto her bike once more, riding like she was possessed into the early morning.

How the hell had she lost Agnes’ bloody book!


	8. Chapter 8

Sophia had a few little secrets that she had long since chosen to keep from her beloved pair, not just to strengthen her own image but also to keep the balance of the happy little friendship they had all built around themselves for the past six thousand years.

Firstly: The fact that Sophia was most definitely still a virgin. Sure she helped humans get their rocks off with each other, and she made an effort almost constantly, but she had never actually wanted to try it out herself with any of the humans she’d encountered before. For her there was only Aziraphale and Crowley that she wanted to share that experience with, but the complications of their opposing factions just seemed to make it all too bloody complicated and dangerous.

Secondly: She didn’t really like classical music that much, she was more in favour for the latest songs whether they be rock, pop, reggae or whatever. Classical music reminded her of the heavenly choirs on occasion and that was enough to put her off the style for an eternity. She listened too it because it made Aziraphale happy, and she knew for a fact that Crowley listened for the same reason also.

And finally, the most important little fact that she kept to herself: The oddity that was the true appearance of her left eye, the true reason she’d always kept a fair bit of time and distance between herself and the other two before her discorporation at the stake.

She sat in front of the little table mirror in her room at the B&B, delicate fingers tracing along the green orb. She had to feel grateful really that, when she’d first landed on her back in the forest, her mind had subconsciously continued to hold the ‘glamour’ she’d placed upon it, whilst leaving everything else weakened and in pain. She gave a sigh, dropping her hand to the table surface as she allowed the illusion to drop.

The pupil began to elongate, becoming a narrow slit within the vibrant emerald green iris that no longer matched the grassy shade of it’s counterpart. It was cat like, almost feral compared to the serenity of the other. Whenever she chose to face this little mutation, she would try to laugh at it and call her eyes ‘love and lust’ but it never really helped to ease the sense of fear it caused in her.

When she’d first noticed the change, during the reign of William the conqueror, she’d felt certain she was falling. That she’d gone too far in her efforts to spread love without permission from heaven and that they were now sending their own message in retaliation. She’d hidden away in a system of caves now known as the Three Counties system and waited to be dragged to hell. She’d waited nearly three decades, scaring the shit out of any creature, human or otherwise, that dared disturb her self-inflicted isolation. But nothing had happened, no claw had gripped her from beneath the earth and dragged her downwards, no voice of the Metatron echoed from heaven to tell her that she was being cast out from heaven.

She’d resurfaced in the early hours of dawn, her new eye dilating at the brightness of the sun and, with a quick flick of her wrist to clean up her attire, she’d stumbled into the realisation that no one in heaven had noticed the change in her, hadn’t even noticed that she’d gone MIA for nearly thirty years. It had been a lonely feeling at first, the idea that the place you had dedicated your very existence too, regardless of how much she hated the orders, couldn’t even be bothered to make a courtesy call. Hell, not even Gabriel had seemed to notice her absence from snapping at him. Probably too busy preening his feathers and thinking he was wonderful to notice anything beyond his ego. Bastard.

She’d given a wary glance around the area before releasing her wings, checking to see if anything had been altered about their appearance, but nothing had been amiss, still the same shimmering silver feathers that she’d had since the beginning. And then she’d stumbled into the nearest tavern, the humans seeming to ignore her also as she willed them to do just that, paying for a goblet of wine and drowning her sorrows way into the early hours of the morning three days later. And then she’d forced herself to get back to work, to accept that she had been altered and that no one else had noticed.

The lonely feeling had soon changed to one of empowerment. She’d never felt more able to be herself, felt that she could spread the one thing she understood, love. She spent centuries after spreading her miracle throughout the world as best as she could, using a portion of her strength to mask the demonic eye that would frighten any human who glanced her. It wasn’t perfect, she could keep it up for a week before needing to rest and hide from the view of others.

It had been an accident that she’d run into Crowley and Aziraphale during the late 1500’s. She’d considered running away before they caught sight of her, but something deep in the pit of her mind had stopped her. She’d missed them, something that she hadn’t considered till now as she sauntered up behind Aziraphale and cooed in his ear. She’d missed how the angel could feel flustered at the drop of a hat, how the demon silently supported her love fuelled anarchy.

She hadn’t realised until she been discorporated at the stake and sent back to heaven for a, delayed, replacement of her body, that she loved the pair. She craved their bickering over little and big things, craved the nights she could sit, drink and just forget that she wasn’t quite like other angels anymore. 

Sophia smiled. She’d told Aziraphale that the near four hundred years in heaven waiting for a fresh body had been solely because she’d been avoiding Gabriel and his wandering hands and overly eager dick. That was only half the truth. She’d also been strengthening her ability to hide her eye. Crowley may not have cared too much about it, but Aziraphale would have had a fit at the mere sight of it. She’d put up with four centuries of dodging Gabriel for the sake of Aziraphale. If that wasn’t love, then even she didn’t know what was.

“Sophia? Are you ok?”

She jumped from her memories, the illusion returning with the blink of her eyes as she turned to find Adam in the doorway of her room, a troubled look on his face as she forced a smile.

“Adam, you should know it’s impolite to enter a woman’s rooms without knocking first”

Her light chastisement caused a little blush on the boy as he kicked his foot and looked away, Dog yipping beside him as if to agree. It was a new thing in Sophia’s mind for an angel to like a hell hound so much.

“I knocked once. You didn’t answer and I thought you were in trouble again”

She laughed at his little white lie. Maybe he had knocked, but she knew it wasn’t because he’d thought she was in trouble that he’d entered, it was clear he wanted to see her. She observed him for a moment, was this really the anti-Christ? A sweet boy who loved his friends and cared for others, who tried to be her body guard at all times. Her smile became more real, causing Adam to relax as she spoke.

“How can I help you, Adam?”

He was scuffing his shoes on the carpet as he spoke, Sophia making a mental note to miracle away any damage that may be caused as she listened to him mutter.

“Well, it’s just that a cottage on the boarders of Tadfield became free and I thought I’d let you know, well, just encase you wanted to stick around”

Sophia felt a moment of pause, had there been a cottage available on the boarders? She summed up her options. She did rather like it around here, so much more peaceful than anywhere she’d lived before and, maybe, she could open a restaurant that would become popular with couples. But it would mean either closing her businesses in the cities or passing the management on. She smiled as she made her decision, seemingly before her mind was truly made up. Adam was looking at her expectantly.

“That sounds wonderful, Adam”

Adam smiled even brighter as he sent an excited look at Dog and then turned back to Sophia. He didn’t really understand it but having Sophia around had only made things better. He liked Sophia, she seemed to breathe joy, fun and life.

“That’s great, you should come with me and the them to see it. We can show you round properly and help you build your nursery and garden!”

That caused Sophia a moment of pause. What the hell did he mean by nursery? Forget the garden, she could do that herself. But NURSERY?

“Erm, Adam… I’m neither pregnant nor with a partner. I don’t need a nursery”

Adam tilted his head at her as she fidgeted, maybe he was just reading too much into thing’s but he could see that something wasn’t right with that statement.

“Well no, you’re not pregnant. But you’re in love. You get the same look in your eyes as my mum gets when she looks at my dad. You should just be honest and say how you feel. I doubt anyone could not love you, Sophia”

Sophia didn’t even have an answer as she turned back to the mirror, focusing on that damned left eye, before choosing to give in and stand from her seat to follow Adam to meet with his friends for her tour of the cottage. She had the funny feeling that she’d get it if she wanted it, even without the help of her miracles. Just how much was Adam altering to keep her in the village?

It was Wednesday and the skies were glorious.


	9. Chapter 9

Crowley crumpled at the sight before him, dust still in the air as human rescue services trawled the wreckage for any casualties.

“Nothing sir, not a single body amongst the rubble. It’s a miracle sir, a tower fall like this should have killed everyone inside, but not a single person was reported to be in the building. Only The penthouse had a sign in for the building, but there’s no sign of Miss Sophia, no surname given, in the debris”

He heard the words echo around his mind. No sign of Sophia, no answer from her phone whenever he tried to call. She was gone, discorporated again. But something the human had said stuck in his mind. No other sign of casualty, no death, a miracle… but Sophia had been in the building. Something had caused the angel to discorporate herself, something that even Sophia had struggled to escape. He felt his teeth grind together and a snarl rip from his throat, dark and filled with menace as a thought filled his mind.

“Gabriel”

The name passed his lips with venom and hatred. That bastard had chased Sophia for as long as he could remember, had tried to coerce her multiple times but this time it seemed he had gone too far. Far enough for her to destroy herself. And, in Crowley’s mind, it had been far enough that he’d ever spoken to her if she didn’t consent to it.

Crowley raised himself to his feet, anger blazing within his eyes as he began to walk towards the Bentley. Fuck heaven and hell. He was going to put a stop to the apocalypse, he’d grab hold of Aziraphale and shake some damned sense into him, he’d scream that heaven had stolen their girl, that hell had started what would steal their precious earth from them. They were on their own side now. He was racing through the streets of London as the thoughts filled his mind, rage fuelling his foot on the acceleration, Queen blaring through the radio as he seethed.

Aziraphale had seemed strange when he had dropped him back off at his bookshop, flustered by something on the backseat, a book if he remembered correctly. Typical Aziraphale, a book meant more than the loss of their girl and the end of the world it seemed. Had Aziraphale felt the loss of Sophia and kept the knowledge from him? Even after their break through on intimacy, Aziraphale still chose a book. Crowley’s hands tightened around the steering wheel at the thought.

“She’s gone… our world is falling around us, I thought we’d finally had a break through and could work towards a future together, just the three of us like it always has been… She’s gone and all he cared about was a fucking book.”

But he wasn’t going to hide away and wait for the end. He’d told Aziraphale that he’d contact his human operative to gather more information, and that was what he was going to do. He jabbed the number into his phone, balancing it between his shoulder and ear as he swerved to miss a pedestrian, by the skin of their teeth, serves them right for being in the middle of the road at the same time as he was driving through. Check green next time moron, oh wait, it had been red. The phone rang in his ear, his mind more on how he could punish the bookish angel than on the voice that answered on the other end.

“This is witchfinder sergeant Shadwell”

***

*Aziraphale’s bookshop, 3 hours earlier*

His eyes couldn’t steal away from the text before him, cocoa long since forgotten despite Agnes’ warning that it was growing cold. He had coveted this book, dreamt of owning the only copy left in existence, despite multiple copies having been made, and he had never even considered that he would actually own a copy. He’d had more than a few rude calls requesting the book, his cheeks flushed at what the callers had insinuated when he had firmly stated he did not own even a single copy of Agnes Nutters ‘The nice and accurate prophecies’. But now it lay before him, correct in all it’s descriptions, as a delicate hand covered in a white cotton glove leafed through each page. Incredible even to his eternal mind, that a human could have seen so far into the future with such pinpoint accuracy.

He stopped for a single moment. The words his eyes conveyed seeming more fabulous and fabricated than even he could believe.

‘Angels and demons, thine besotted dance of six millennia, shalt end with hellish fyre and blessed water. Thine angel, caught betwixt heaven and hell, shalt rise from ashes, born anew. Thine eye shalt see truth in beloved deception’

He scoffed at the words. The only demon and angels he knew personally were himself, Crowley and Sophia. Crowley was, despite ability to have an imagination and a touch of compassion at the insistence of Aziraphale, still a demon. And he and Sophia were most certainly angels. He had never, before now, tried to go against heaven beyond his little arrangement to get things done quicker with Crowley. And Sophia, well she was Sophia, the angel of love who screamed to the heavens at the injustice of the world. Sure, she’d gone a little wild in the last thousand years, but she was still the beacon of light she’d always been. Sophia was the light he clung too, she could never fall in his eyes, and Crowley was the reality of how humanity had become. Aziraphale loved them both beyond what words could describe.

He’d seen it for himself. When Sophia walked the streets of Soho, love followed behind, new couples forming behind her, fuelled by the gentle sound of her laughter on the breeze as she gazed upon Crowley and himself. No, he refused to believe that she was hiding anything, she was too bloody blunt for that. He flipped the page, not wanting to pay more attention to the scandalous prophesy, how dare Agnes cast such aspersions upon any of them.

He settled two pages later, landing on a prophesy even less easy to his stomach. His fingers began to dial the number on his out-dated phone, holding the receiver to his ear as dreaded words filled his ear.

“This is the Young residence ‘Look Dad, he’s standing on his hind legs!’”

Aziraphale felt his metaphorical heart stop as he blustered the words ‘Sorry, right number’ before slamming down the receiver and began to scramble together his mind. He needed to contact Crowley. He needed to contact heaven.

It was Wednesday afternoon, and, in London, the clouds hung grey and looming.

***

*The village of Tadfield*

Sophia hummed beneath the glorious August sunshine, feeling every part of her existence vibrate with the feel of the village around her. She’d never felt such love, never felt so strong as she watched people around her greet with easiness and acceptance, except for Mr Tyler who seemed to view everyone with suspicion, regardless of colour or belief. She smiled as two young women held hands and smiled with affection, no fear in their heart that they’d be attacked for their love of each other. Beautiful. Sophia had never felt so capable of spreading love as she sent a small miracle their way, promising a life together filled with all the good things that true love could bring. It was almost like this village was barriered from hate. She smiled to herself at the thought. Could it be that Adam felt no hate in his heart, could love any and all that welcomed the emotion within their own heart? 

“Why are you crying?”

Sophia stopped at the familiar voice, filled with the same concern that had greeted her own ears when she had fallen in the forest. She edged closer towards the voice, warmth filling her at the sheer amount of love presented in the moment, noticing she was hiding behind a bush of Jasmine cottage as she listened and feeling a little ashamed that she was hiding.

“I lost something, a family treasure that we’ve followed for centuries… Agnes would laugh that I’ve lost it”

Sophia listened, her eyes glimpsing a woman held over a garden bench in full distress. She wanted to reach out and send soothing waves to the woman, but Adam beat her too it.

“I wrote a book once, full of pirates, aliens and dinosaurs. Bet it would make you feel better than the book you’d lost”

Sophia had doubted his attempt at first, but then the young woman had laugh. Granted it was doubtful and more to make the boy feel confident in his words, but she had laughed and turned tearful eyes upon him. Sophia couldn’t believe that Adam was evil, not after that, not after all the effort he’d made to make even her feel welcome in his home village. She pulled herself from hiding, making it seem that she was simply walking by as Adam turned happy eyes upon her.

“Adam, are you bothering this woman?”

Her tone was intentionally soft and caring as she took a place beside him and smiled at the young woman. Too many people in this village treated Adam and his friends with suspicion. Sophia knew his true nature… And yet she could only feel it in her being to love him like her own child. Adam looked at her with child eyes as he spoke.

“No, I heard her crying and thought I’d try and make her feel better… I don’t like to see people cry”  
Anathema watched the pair for a moment. There was something about the red haired woman that reminded her of the strange pair she’d met the evening before. She took a moment to try and focus on the woman’s aura, feelings swamped as a collection of auras hit her. Almost like humanity was hitting her all at once. She felt love, pink. Anger, red. Envy, green. Hope, yellow. Sorrow, blue. Emptiness, black. And white. Pure and endless. Anathema felt like she couldn’t breath as she tried, and failed, to pin down a single aura in the woman whose eyes bore into her, a look in those beautiful green orbs that told her to not try and delve deeper.

Sophia simply chose to smile, making her way towards the woman crying on the bench, crouching down to whisper in her ear, more out of instinct than anything more.

“You cannot sense me, witch… Look after this child in the next few days, or I shall reign brimstone upon you and all that you love. The end of all things will be nothing compared to my wrath”

She stood then, leaving Anathema feeling that she had no choice but to offer lemonade. Sophia turned kind eyes upon Adam as she spoke. She was herself again, she had the strength behind her to summon her bike. Adam had a new fixation, he had the witch girl, she concluded. She’d return if she could. But right now, she’d finally found the sense of mind to return to the task at hand.

“Adam, I have to go and see my friends, let them know I’m safe. I promise to come back”

There wasn’t a doubt in Adam’s mind that Sophia would come back. He could feel the love rolling from her for the little village of Tadfield as she straddled the motorbike. Had she always been wearing white bike leathers? He didn’t think more on it as Anathema invited him in for lemonade.

Sophia roared down the empty roads of Tadfield. Her first stop, home.

Deep in her heart, she could feel it. The roar of another engine, scarlet hair much bloodier in shade compared to her own flickering in the wind. They both felt each other and whilst once grimaced and the other smiled, they both felt the end drawing closer.


	10. Chapter 10

Annoyance was an emotion that Aziraphale rarely felt. His patience was that of a saint and he prided himself on that fact when dealing with his dear Crowley and Sophia. The pair could get quite childish in their behaviour at times. But this, this took the cake.

Gabriel sauntered around his beautiful bookshop, Sandalphon following close behind like the lapdog he was as the giant oaf picked up book after book, only to drop them back onto the pile with about at much care and grace as a brick to the face. Aziraphale wanted to usher the pair from his shop, lock the door and scream in sheer frustration at the mere knowledge that these two had stepped foot in his sanctuary.

“Ah Aziraphale! We’d very much like to discuss the purchase of your human reading material… Er, your, your…”

“Pornography?”

“Yes, pornography. We’d like to discuss your pornography!”

There was an old lesson in the back of his mind, something useful that Sophia had taught to Aziraphale for situations such as this as the lumbering pair of illiterate, bog-brained idiots began moving closer to him, smiling like they’d got the right answer to the text held in Gabriel’s over-sized mitts.

‘Remember, Zira, if you need to fake a smile to keep the atmosphere polite, think of something that makes you feel at peace, something that makes you happy’

‘Like my bookshop, dear? Or a lovely lunch at the Ritz?’

‘Perfect, honey’

‘What do you think of, Sophia?’

She’d simply smiled at him and changed the subject back to helping him master the polite, fake smile. And now he found himself putting the skill into practice, smiling amiably and gesturing for the pair to follow him into his backroom, watching as Gabriel began to speak, gesturing with the book still in his hands and swinging it around with no care or thought for the damage such treatment could inflict. He was starting to better understand why Sophia constantly wanted to slap the arch-angel into the next millennia.

“So, Aziraphale. How goes monitoring the anti-Christ?”

***

*The streets of central London*

She rubbed at her left eye to try and calm the twitch developing, staring at the ruins as her bike came too a halt. She’d hoped in the back of her mind that maybe something had survived her run-in with Gabriel, but clearly fortune was not on her side with that. Everything had been destroyed in her panicked ‘last resort’.

“Awful, isn’t it? It’s a miracle that no one was hurt at all. Though they say that the resident of the pent house was still registered in the building when it fell, they can’t find a body… I do hope the poor dear is alright”

Sophia turned towards the voice, smiling kindly at the little old lady who had spoken to her. She was clutching a Zimmer frame and staring at the wrecked building. Sophia could sense the genuine concern within the words and replied with gentle words of her own.

“A miracle indeed. I’m sure that she is fine… Possibly more than a little annoyed right now”

The old woman chuckled and patted a hand against her arm before walking away. Sophia looked back at the building, sighing a little in relief at the confirmation that she’d managed to remove all the humans from the building before it had fallen. But a troubling thought filled her mind as she made to start the engine on her bike once more.

“I’ve gone against Gabriel. Purple eyed prick probably thinks I’m actually eradicated… And he’s likely putting the pressure on Aziraphale now that the end is drawing near”

She slumped against the bike as she came to her decision. It was too dangerous for her to go back to Aziraphale or Crowley right now, both would have too many eyes on them and if she made herself known then it could only make the situation worse. No, better to go back to Tadfield and monitor Adam and hope that her boys could figure out where to go without her. Aziraphale was very clever after all.

The bike roared to life and she made her way back to the little village that seemed to act like a safety net against wondering celestial eyes. She felt a pang of pain in her mind, like shattering glass as her senses caught the deliverance of a second parcel, of a second engine filling the wind. Eyes filled with hunger and sharp teeth twisted into a cruel smile entered into her mind causing her to shiver in disgust. Another rider on the dawn of destruction.

***

*Aziraphale’s bookshop*

Gabriel couldn’t stop the smile on his face at the look on Aziraphale’s face as he spoke of the impending apocalypse, enjoying how the white haired angel wrung his hands at the inevitability of losing all he had grown to love on earth, the inevitability of returning to the sparse corridors of heaven. Sandalphon was stood beside him as he too seemed to enjoy the distress of the lesser angel, who had lost his polite smile in favour of worrying his lower lip and glancing around at the books around him.

It wasn’t that he’d always disliked the lesser angel, or that he’d always enjoyed the misery that his crueller orders had caused to Aziraphale. No, at one point, Gabriel had thought he might have actually rather liked the bookworm. At least until he had noticed the fondness that Sophia expressed towards him, how she sang his praises in her reports or when she argued with Gabriel. How she chose to visit him more than she returned to heaven and enjoy his company for the sheer fact that she liked him. She’d even gone out of her way a number of times to obtain an old edition of some human text that she knew Aziraphale didn’t own, that she knew would gain a light filled smile from him.

That was why Gabriel enjoyed Aziraphale’s misery. The rotund little principality had the affection that he wanted from Sophia. A thought sparked within his mind as a cruel glint came to his eyes, masked by a sincere expression that seemed to cause Aziraphale to go rigid where he stood.

“I forgot to mention Aziraphale, you’re quite close to the Seraphim Sophia?”

“Ye-yes, she pops by once in a while to discuss how things have been and occasionally bring a first edition she has discovered, why?”

Aziraphale felt almost like his stomach was twisting with worry as Gabriel came to stand beside him, placing a false hand of sympathy upon his shoulder, the words leaving his mouth causing Aziraphale to almost crumple to the floor, choosing to brace himself against his desk instead.

“I’m sorry to tell you that she eradicated herself in the early hours of Tuesday afternoon. Destroyed her entire apartment building in the process. We are unsure as to why”

Gabriel chose to leave on those words, a cruel smile on his lips as he and Sandalphon stepped onto the streets of London and prepared to return to heaven, the knowledge that he had torn a piece of Aziraphale’s heart out felt rather nice to his mind.

“Are you sure she’s eradicated? I can still sense her spirit”

Gabriel could sense it too. The feeling was weak, too weak for Aziraphale to pin down, but he prided himself on being able to sense even the weakest pulse of angelic energy.

“No, she’s still with us. She thinks she’s hidden, but I can sense her… I’m just waiting for her to raise that pretty little head of hers, and then I shall drag her back to heaven myself”

***

*A flat on the outskirts of Soho*

“Be gone with ye harlot, ye whore of Babylon!”

Newton felt himself wince at the unkind words, wanting to defend the gaudily dressed woman in her mid-fifties as she tottered on impossible heels but stopped himself as she swooned at Shadwell’s words and muttered something along the lines off ‘you say the loveliest things mister S’ before disappearing into her own flat, fanning her flushed face with red painted, manicured hands and smiling coyly. 

“Come on with ye lad, before the painted jezebel returns”

He was ushered into the dishevelled flat, the equally dishevelled man slamming the door behind him and peering out of the peep hole before darting further into the room, almost like a man afraid of being caught doing something wrong.

“She seemed nice”

Shadwell’s replying glare could have drowned puppies as he snapped at the young man before him. He’d need to be toughened up if he was going to become the next generation of the witchfinder army.

“Aye, all whore’s look nice to innocent young men without a clue”

Now, Newton may have been wrong he thought as Shadwell moved to the rickety old fridge in his kitchen to grab a can of condensed sweetened milk, but he could have sworn there was a hint of jealousy in that raspy voice. The man in question was chugging straight from the can, swiping a blackened nail hand over his mouth as he continued to glare at Newton before slamming the can down on the table and pointing the grimy nailed appendage at him in a menacing fashion.

“What is the first weapon in the arsenal of any witchfinder?”

“Erm… This?”

Shadwell watched as Newt pulled the pin from him pocket and held it up, almost like a terrified school boy on his first day in a new school, nodding in praise before firing another question at the confused young man.

“And what, is our first tactic to fight the witches of this world?”

Newt began to half-heartedly thrust the pin, like a pathetic attempt at thrusting a sword as Shadwell simply chose to look at him like he was an idiot.

“No lad. It’s this”

He pointed towards the pile of newspapers on the coffee table, Newt feeling his heart sink at the thought of going through all of them as he was guided to the dirty old sofa and forced to sit down, directed to do just what he had hoped he wouldn’t have to do.

“Go through all these and search for any sign of abnormal activity, things that may mean the involvement of witches. I’m going to meet with one of the armies sponsors, I’ll be back in an hour or two”

As Shadwell reached the door, he turned and sent a final order to poor Newt as he stared hopelessly at the pile of old newspapers.

“And don’t forget, Laddie. Check for any mention of nipples, the more the better!”

The door slammed behind him and Newt sent a glance to the door for certainty he was a lone before muttering under his breath.

“Better be a playboy in here somewhere if you want me to find nipples in the Times”


	11. Chapter 11

Sophia gave a smile of relief as she rolled to a halt before her little cottage, the village of Tadfield seeming as peaceful as she’d left it only a day before. It was Thursday, a cloud hung over the sky, seemingly none threatening but Sophia knew better, she could feel the malice within the air, no matter how subtle.

“Sophia!”

Her eyes darted from the skies to meet the eager orbs of Adam and the Them, feeling a smile upon her lips spread despite her own fears and concerns. She glanced back at the skies as she dismounted her bike, meeting eyes with Adam as he sent a concerned glance towards her.

“Are you ok? You don’t seem happy”

She paused in the act of removing her helmet, four sets of eyes staring at her as her shoulders sagged and she gave a weary sigh before fully removing the head gear.

“Actually, Adam, I’m not so great… I’m cut off from those I love dearest because someone may hurt them if I reach out. I can’t escape the fact that I’ve gone against my side, or what I thought was my side… And I’m scared. Not for me, I’d give everything if I thought it would protect them. I’m scared that I’ve backed them into a corner and they’re in danger”

She clutched her head as a silent scream of agony ripped from her throat. A third rider, his grip on the world one of toxic waste and mutation, his white hair fluttered on the corner of her mind, another section of her being ripped out as more poison entered the world and the lives of all that she loved.

“Sophia! What’s wrong?”

Pepper, the little girl who would one day fight for women’s rights. She turned pained eyes towards the child as she crumpled to the floor. No matter how much love filled this village, it couldn’t stop the spread of those to come, they were far larger than this village, couldn’t stop that pain that wrecked her corporeal form. Sophia, like all angel’s, was a being of love, but it went far beyond that. Her very role in the grand plan was to spread love around the world, demonic eye be damned. She was love given a body and, as the plagues of humanity began to rise, she felt herself grow weaker than ever before. This wasn’t like expending all her energy to escape. This was true annihilation, this was the end of love, the true end of humanity.

She forced herself back onto her feet as those eyes bore into her very existence, meeting them in a chilling gaze as her lips formed into a grimace, eyes rolling back into her skull, remaining wide open as she began to face into her own mind, her lips forming words that could barely reach a human’s ears, yet Adam heard every word.

“And four shall rise… The end of love is nigh”

She slumped against the door then, gaining a horrified gasp from three sets of mouths, two sets of hands holding her shoulders up as another opened the front door and pulled her into the safety of the cottage, towards the sofa. One set of eyes could only watch as voices in his head began to echo, resounding with her words and becoming stronger by the second.

‘Four riders, your friends… Change this world. You can do it’

He knocked the thoughts away as he entered the house and grabbed a face towel from the bathroom, wetting it to place upon a feverish forehead.

*A stylish flat within the heart of Soho*

The rustle of leaves filled the room, fear emanating through each stem and branch within the atrium of the penthouse. Furniture lay smashed against the stark, slate grey walls as he stalked across the room, pages from a book fluttering around the room as he snagged at each and threw them away just as quickly. A globe floated in the centre, the target for his clawed hand to punch and snarl at as he seethed.

His mind felt filled with red mist as he sent manic eyes towards his golden throne, memory providing the image of Sophia lounging upon it, a look of fond exasperation on her face. He tore his eyes away, eyes meeting the memory of Aziraphale wringing his hands within the bandstand as they argued, as Crowley tried to convince him that they should leave together, that they still had each other, and Sophia would never wish to see them in pain.  
He sneered at the memory, how Aziraphale had ‘forgiven’ him for his blasphemy of the ‘Great’ fucking plan and then proceeded to ask him not to leave, told him that they had no where left to go. Naïve angel still so devoted to the law of heaven as their lives fell to ruin around them. 

*Two hours earlier*

Aziraphale looked at him with pleading eyes, beseeching him to calm down as Crowley stalked across the bandstand, eyes unblinking and shades ripped from their place hiding those inhuman yellow eyes. The angel’s words hung heavy in the air between them.

“I don’t even like you”

“You do”

Aziraphale had ruffled at the implication of those words, remembering their tryst in the Bentley and feeling his cheeks flush as Crowley swooped closer, bracketing him against the railings and bringing his face so close that their lips ghosted against each other in the most glancing of touches.

“Tell me that you don’t crave me angel, that you don’t want to be near me. Tell me that you don’t want me… Tell me that you don’t feel anything at all for myself and our fallen renegade”

Lips traced across his cheek, down the column of his throat in the barest of touches, pain filling Aziraphale’s eyes, shuddering as memories of Sophia in his bookshop, fingers touching with love against the spine of each tome and novel as she smiled at him, filled his mind and his hands pressed against Crowley’s chest with a strength that seemed not his own.

“It’s over Crowley… We’re done”

He felt too broken to play his demon’s games anymore.

*Back with Crowley, present time*

A hand lashed out to the side, the sound of roots ripping from soil and the dull thud of a helpless Philodendron hitting against the opposing wall, he’d later remember that it had been a gift from Aziraphale with the precious words ‘try to be kind to this one’.

His eyes snapped to the side as the television began to flicker to life and two faces filled the screen, forcing his face to become empty as he mind screamed for blood, and two sets of eyes met his own.

“We’re onto you Crawly, you’ll answer to hell for your treachery. Well… you won’t have chance to answer between your screams. We’re coming for you, Crawly”

The screen went blank and Crowley felt the bloodlust grow stronger as he began to move around his apartment, gathering the equipment he’d need.

“Gonna come for me, are you? I’ll take you bastards with me”

*A blank plain within the recess of her mind*

She blinked against the brightness that surrounded her, hand clutched to temple as she curled into a tighter ball upon the stark floor, cool and only a minimal reprieve from the heat that coursed through her.

“Christ… I feel like shit”

Her words were ground out and pained as she twisted to try and reach more of the cooling relief, stopping in her desperate search as a cold chuckle filled her ears and desperate eyes tried to pin down the source of the noise. Nothing but light, the voice seemed to echo all around as it grew more menacing, words spat like knives.

“It’ll only get worse, you know. You’re pathetic”

“Show yourself! Bastard, I’ll rip your fucking face off!”

More laughter, maniacal as a figure began to manifest at her level on the ground, languid in its positioning and a demented smile twisted upon its lips. Eyes of emerald green split at the pupils met her own and she felt her lips form into a scream.

“Funny how you can talk so big whilst writhing on the floor. Shame you can’t show the same backbone outside your own mind. Does the sight of your own demon horrify you that much?”  
The figure moved too quickly as it stood to tower over her and gripped the front of her clothing, forcing her up onto trembling feet.

“You’re not real!”

“Oh but I am. That left eye is proof enough that I am, indeed, very real. Look at you, first sign of horseman and you crumble. If I had my way, we’d tear them limb from limb. Love can be vicious after all”

A tongue swiped across too sharp teeth and a sigh filled with mirth passed lips before grimacing and throwing her away with a heavy thump.

“But no. You choose to ignore me, hide me behind that act of attitude and bravado, when you could easily be the real thing. You’d prefer to pretend that love is all rosy and happy. You know first hand that’s a load of bullshit”

Sophia was clutching at her head, trying to block at the truth behind those words. Hands gripped her wrists and pulled them away, glaring eyes boring into her own panicked ones. Her eyes, her voice… Her true feelings.

“You’ve seen first hand how easily love is corrupted, how easy it is for hell to take all your hard work and corrupt it. You were there when Troy fell, saw how easily love could be turned to war! You’ve heard the screams of women and men throughout history being violated, beaten and abused by those who claimed to love them. And children, left to starve or fight for survival because their precious parents or guardians chose a needle over them!”

They were inches apart, tears streaming down both their faces as something seemed to dawn within Sophia’s mind, a hand pulling free from the others grasp to wipe at a watery eye. The demon within her own being felt all the pain that Sophia had bottled over the centuries, was the very manifestation of all that was negative she had witnessed in her role in spreading love.

“And now, you’re just going to lay dying on that fucking sofa in a cottage, whilst everything falls to shit because you can’t accept that you could be stronger if you just stopped lying to everyone”

“I’m not dying… I just feel a bit off”

Another cynical laugh as two foreheads were pressed together, and a knuckle knocked her upside the head.

“Moron. The horseman waking up is killing you and you know it. Stop trying to act tough now that you’ve had a dress down. Your very existence feeds off the love in the worlds atmosphere, that’s why you healed so quickly after landing in Tadfield, the whole place is static with the feeling. The horseman taint and destroy that atmosphere and, therefore, you along with it… How do you think that will make our boys feel?”

Their hands linked together as the image of a white haired angel and an auburn haired demon filled their mind, a warmth spreading through both their beings.

“What should I do? How do I get through this?”

“Stop hiding what you are, accept that a little part of you has been tainted by the evil in the world, both made by hell and mankind, and use it to do some good, the good that heaven can’t be arsed to do. Show the same spirit you had when you tried to blow up Gabriel”

“I hate that douche bag”

They shared a small laugh, their fingers beginning to meld together as softer words filled her ears and they began to sink into each other’s embrace.

“That makes two of us… Don’t ignore me anymore, we’re stronger when we truly accept ourselves”

Sophia clutched at the air around her as the other became a part of her being, the feeling of another soul settling so comfortably within her own causing a serge of warmth and completion to cascade across her existence, like a luxurious bath, her eyes remaining closed as the light grew intolerable and she felt herself being pulled backwards and felt soft cushions against her back as her eyes finally snapped back open.

Mismatching eyes met the white ceiling of her cottage, the rays of sunshine filling the little room and confirming the arrival of Friday morning. She lifted herself from the sofa, feeling the strength in her legs begin to grow once more as she stumbled past a full length mirror, not bothering to try and cover the demonic eye that now soaked in the world around her.

“Horseman can’t taint what’s already tainted”


	12. Chapter 12

Anathema blinked in confusion as Mr. Tyler strode off in his own self-righteous delusion. What did he mean by ‘fatty spliffers’ and what did that have to do with her asking about any abnormal activity in the area?

“Ignore him, witch. Some people just have their head shoved up their arse and can’t be helped”

She jumped at the voice and remembered, for some reason, a sense of terror at that melodic voice that belonged within a choir. She turned wary eyes and felt them bulge at the sight before her. The woman before her seemed so much more domineering than before, but those eyes didn’t seem right. Last, she had seen, those eyes had been perfectly human, as green as meadows. Terrifying, but human. Now they were human on the right and feline on the left as the woman in question cocked a hip and simply stared at her with a look of boredom, her head tilted to the side as she huffed in annoyance.

“Give me a break witch, don’t tell me your little book of everything to come didn’t warn you about me? My very being tells me all about you, fuck, I could tell you how you were conceived… How’d you feel about drunken fumbles over a kitchen surface?”

Anathema could have fallen over at the woman’s words as she clutched for her bike handles and tried to ground herself down. Fat lot of good it did for her she thought as her own brown eyes met mismatching orbs of never ending eternity, she knew about Agnes’ book and, despite the fact that Anathema knew she was dealing with a supernatural being, it still knocked her a little. She remembered that, the last time she’d seen this woman, she’d been dressed all in white and seemed to radiate light. Now, she was dressed in black and red, a red tartan skirt with black box patterns that barely reached half way up her thigh, chains hanging around the hip and a black button up shirt with a silk red tie. Her hair was different too, it had been down to her hips last Anathema had seen her. Now her hair was cropped back in a bob cut, ruffed to look dishevelled, with only her fringe hanging long and clasped back in a styled quiff. But the light hadn’t vanished, it shone with a harsher brightness, enough to burn her eyes.

“I’d never have guessed it would be you! You seemed so angry when you told me to look over Adam, how the hell am I meant to realise that you’re the angel of love!”

Sophia chuckled as she snapped her fingers and a bottle of Chateau Latife appeared in her other hand, leaving Anathema to stare in amazement as the red headed woman strode away, motioning for the other to follow her, her voice overly cheerful.

“What? You thought I’d be running around throwing glitter on young couples, throwing flower petals over my head and shooting rainbows from my arse? Assumptions make a fool of you and me. Now hurry up, Anathema”

“How did you know my name?”

Sophia stopped at the gate of her cottage, a look on her face that could only mean ‘seriously?’ as she waved the expensive bottle around like it meant nothing.

“You’re joking right? I tell you how you were conceived, and you ask how I know your name? You need to get your questions in line, witch. I don’t feel like playing games, pick what you want to know, and I may answer”

She held the gate open for the brunette, summoning two glasses and motioning towards the little seating area she’d manifested for such occasions. Anathema just felt confused. This was the same woman who had threatened her with brimstone, now offering her a glass of VERY expensive wine.

“Where did you get this? How did you get this?”

Sophia had already taken the first sip of her own glass, a satisfied quirk of the lip on her face as she shrugged and took another, much larger sip.

“France, Rothschild estate. It’s fine, they won’t miss one bottle. Might miss three but we’ll see. As for how, trade secret.”

“but Agnes said you were an angel! Isn’t stealing against your moral code!?”

Anathema felt that she may be on the verge of shock. She’d always believed that angels were upstanding and morally incorruptible. This one just made no sense to her own beliefs.

“Like I said, assumptions make a fool of you and me. Look, I could tell you tales of angels and demons that would make your toes curl and your brain go boom. Gabriel, for example: total prick who thinks too much with said appendage. A little click of the fingers here and there for a bottle of wine on my part is literally nothing compared to the atrocities he and the others have committed”

Anathema couldn’t help but smile slightly at the other, before chuckling and taking a sip of her own wine, eyes shutting at the delicious nectar as it passed across her tongue and lit her taste buds alight with its flavour.

“You aren’t anything like I expected. But that’s probably a good thing, I get annoyed at overly cheerful people who think the world is all roses. This is much better”

“You’d probably get annoyed at Zira then. That angel is a walking ray of sunshine, except when he’s worrying about EVERY little thing. But I love that about him, gives a balance to myself and Crowley… I hope I get to see my boys after all this, there’s a lot I need to tell them. And I still need to get back at Zira for getting me burnt at the stake”

Anathema couldn’t help but notice the fond glint in the angel’s eyes or how she seemed to smile sadly at the thought of these two beings. She chose not to bring it up however as Sophia refreshed both their glasses and continued talking about everything and nothing at all, like someone who just needed a friend to listen and speak with. Anathema felt that maybe she could do that, she felt that she could actually grow to quite like the strange red headed angel that knocked back wine and ranted about the issues of the world as she saw them.

***

*A flat on the outskirts of Soho*

Newton’s eyes darted over the pages, flinging paper after paper behind him as more strange stories popped up before him. Record weather in summer, an ideal winter wonderland every Christmas, perfect apple trees winning the same farmers market awards every year for the past eleven years.

“How the hell is that even possible!? It’s ENGLAND! Wet, miserable weekends in July and not a hint of snow at Christmas… There’s a bloody reason we have the expression ‘face like a wet weekend in Margate’. This can’t be natural”

He jumped in his seat as the front door of the grimy flat was opened and slammed shut, turning to meet the sight of sergeant Shadwell making his way over to the table piled high with newspapers and magazines.

“Anything to report private Pulsifer?”

“Yes, look at this! Perfect summers, crisp autumns and snow filled Christmas’s. This has to be something, right?”

“Any mentions of nipples, laddie?”

Seriously, what was with this man and nipples? Newton felt his excitement sag slightly at the expectant look in the older man’s eyes. If he wanted nipples that badly then Newton was certain Madam Tracey would happily volunteer. The woman was smitten.

“Well no, but surely you agree that this is strange. It’s everything you dreamed of as a kid, perfect seasons every year without fail”

“No laddie, if there’s no witches mentioned, then it’s not our concern”

A little more of his enthusiasm sank before his thoughts clutched desperately at one final thread of hope.

“Well maybe I could go and check to be certain? There may be witches and their just really good at hiding” 

Shadwell took a moment to consider the suggestion. Newton had a point; witches could be tricky spawns of hell and surely, they’d have gotten a grasp on how to hide themselves over the centuries? Perhaps there was hope for young Pulsifer yet as a witch finder if he were thinking like this so soon in his position as private. Shadwell gave a firm nod as he saw the spark return to the young mans eyes as he spoke in agreement.

“Aye laddie, you might not be wrong. Best to catch them unawares. Be back here at nine in the morning for your instructions and armour”

“Armour?”

“Aye, everything you’ll need to fight against the dark powers”

Newton was out the door like a bullet, thankful to breath fresh air and to finally have something exciting to look forward too. He doubted there’d be any actual witches but it would be a nice change to be in the village of Tadfield for a day or two.

***

*Outside Aziraphale’s book shop*

He stepped out from the taxi, handing over more than required before making his way towards his front door. It had been a nice meal, a lovely little café only a ten minute drive away. He gave a sad smile; Crowley could have made it in half the time despite Aziraphale’s protests against his speed. It had been a nice meal, but it could have been made better with the dry wit of a certain demon or the influence of a certain angel filling the room with love. As it stood, he had cut his ties with the demon and the angel had left both earthly and ethereal plain.

It was an awfully lonely state he found himself in. Heaven and hell were bent on the idea of war and nothing he tried to say on the contrary could change their mind. He floundered for a moment, a realisation entering his mind. He’d never actually been alone, done anything alone. Crowley had always appeared when he needed an excuse for temptation, sharing oysters was a prime example, or needed rescuing, such as with the books during world war II, and Sophia had always been there when he needed a re-enforcement for acts of love. Christ, she’d convinced him to help her spread the seas for the Hebrews during the reign of Ramses II, her love for them and the pain she felt for their suffering too much for him to refuse, they’d both remained hidden until Moses’ call, when walls of water had taken place to keep them obscured, of course. Had he ever done anything without the influence of his beloved angel and demon, his left and right shoulder?

Had he always relied on them so strongly?

“Angel!”

He snapped from his self-doubtful thoughts, the Bentley pulling up beside him as a copper haired demon threw himself from the driver’s seat and stood before him, sunglasses hiding blown eyes of panic. Crowley felt flustered from his close call from Hastur and Ligur… He shivered at the thought of the vaporised visage of Ligur on his living room floor, Holy water was one HELL of a weapon. To think that he’d once entertained his angels in that very room, not fit now for such indulgences. If he had the chance, he’d at least give one angel the luxury of a completely new apartment. Crowley felt a tug at his long ‘forgotten’ heart at the thought of Sophia. He’d lost one angel to this war. He wouldn’t lose another. 

“Crowley, what do you need?”

Trust Aziraphale to be polite at a time like this. He felt the words fall from his lips, burning with every syllable yet he wouldn’t hold his tongue now, he needed his surviving angel to come with him. He needed his redemption.

“Look, I’m sorry. There, I’ve said what no other demon would say. Now, come with me! Alpha Centauri is amazing this time of year, we can be on our own side, Sophia wouldn’t want us dealing with this shit!”

Aziraphale physically recoiled at his words. Sure, Sophia wouldn’t want either of them to be in any danger, but this was beyond simple ‘danger’. This was going against both heaven and hell, this was… running away. Sophia, for as long as he’d known her, had never once ran away. She’d fought tooth and nail for her beliefs, he could still remember the thunder storms caused by her arguing with Gabriel, though he felt that she’d held back even then. He worried his lower lip for a moment, a part of him wanting to run away with the demon, wanting to forget the pain of loss. But no, it was time for him to take a stand, remember a little of what he had learned from Sophia.

“No… I am an angel and you are a demon. We can’t fight this anymore, dear boy… We can only hope that we have a chance at averting the apocalypse. After that, I doubt we have any hope of seeing each other again”

Those words hurt them both as Aziraphale refused to meet Crowley’s glare, the demon almost denting the driver’s side door of the Bentley as he hissed words filled with anger.

“Fine, I’ll go alone… maybe I spent too many millennia on the wrong angel. Sophia would have seen my side of the argument and actually considered it instead of pretending. Shame she was so intent on being alone, shame she’s DEAD, maybe she had the right idea!”

Aziraphale felt his heart breaking at those words, harsh in all ways as the demon flung himself back into the Bentley and sped off before Aziraphale could untie his tongue and call his name.

“Oh Crowley”

***

*In a front garden in Tadfield*

“And that, is why ‘hic’… I don’t eat meat!”

Anathema felt her head spinning with the alcohol she’d consumed, trying to focus on the woman sat in the armchair opposite her as she slung her legs over the arms and downed the last of her own glass. The pair had moved into the cottage when the sun had started to set and Sophia had, true to her word, summoned another two bottles of the delicious wine.

 

“You’re saying ‘hic’ You went veg… vega… veggie in the second century?”

“Yep. Nothing puts you off meat… like the Brazen bull”

Anathema shivered at the thought and felt her stomach turn at the image it conjured. That was enough to turn anyone into a vegetarian. Sophia groaned as she looked at the clock on her mantle piece, how the hell had midnight happened? She gave a drunken snort, oh yeah: earth rotating around the sun. They’d been drinking solidly for several hours and now the day of reckoning had arrived. But there was still time to sober Anathema up, send her home to bed and prepare for their big date with destiny.

Anathema gave a sigh at the cool hand that rested against her forehead without warning, eyes meeting Sophia’s own as she felt something suddenly twisting within her body, the wince on Sophia’s face enough to say that she was feeling it also.

“Give it a minute. You’ll have a weird taste in your mouth, but this is quicker than letting you sober up naturally. Besides, a hangover won’t do you any good for what’s about to happen”

Anathema watched in amazement as the once empty bottles of wine began to refill once more, her mind becoming clear again before acknowledging the crappy taste that filled her mouth, like she’d just thrown up.

“You get used to it after a while. Not pleasant, but effective… You should go, big day is only just starting”

Sophia watched as Anathema left, cycling down the lane towards her own cottage. She hoped they could do this again; she actually quite liked the witch. She reminded her a little of Agnes, she’d been quite fond of her also before she’d been discorporated and Agnes had been killed in the same fashion only years after.

“Well, sober now. Better get my battle gear on, shit’s about to get messy”


	13. Chapter 13

Shadwell grimaced as the pin pinged from its position on the map, for the third time. despite his attempts to keep it in place. It had smouldered too hot, his fingers burning before it burnt his fingers too hit and, when he’d pulled his fingers away, had shot across the room with enough force to shatter the display case of the thunder gun. That had never happened before, and it’s positioning caused him an increasing sense of worry. Tadfield, where he had sent young Pulsifer that very morning, where the young lad now found himself with no back up. What if those witches were too strong for him?

“I cannae leave the laddie alone!”

Eyes filled with panic shot to the front door of his flat, Madam Tracy tottering in on too high stilettoes, a tea tray balanced precariously between her hands as she smiled fondly towards him.

“Tea is ready Mr. S, I’ve got some lovely kippers for tomorrow morning by the way, I’ll leave them at your door for you?”

Shadwell shuddered at his own mind; he’d much prefer to share them with the harlot. He forced the thought away, snarling at the painted harlot as she sauntered down the steps of his porch towards him, her tea tray held with the practice of a woman who had been doing this for as long as he’d lived in the flat, placing it down on the seldom used dining table.

“Oh Mr. Shadwell, you look so very stressed. Are you ok dear?”

He glared at the offensive map before turning, seldom seen, worried eyes towards madam Tracy, clenching his fists and doing his damned best to appear strong as he spoke.

“Something is wrong, whore… I sent young Pulsifer to a den of iniquity, but it’s too strong… I need to go after him, protect him”

Madam Tracy flustered at those words. She’d never known this glorious man show such compassion for another, she found her very being gathering to strengthen him as she pulled used notes from her dress pockets.

“Ok Mr. S take this and go check on the poor lad. Go on, take it”

“I cannae take your money harlot!”

They both ruffled at his words, Madam Tracey from indignation and Shadwell from foolish pride. He’d never take money from the painted jezebel; it was enough for him that she made him cups of tea and kippers on Sunday. Nicest thing anyone had ever done for him and he was happy with just that.

“Well how about one of your contacts?”

He thought for a moment. It wasn’t a bad idea. The two southerners came to mind. Not Mr. Crowley, Shadwell was convinced that the red head was a member of some mafia family and it was never a good idea to owe them money. But the other, the pansy, now he was a soft touch if Shadwell had ever seen one.

“Aye, you might be right harlot. And I know just where to find him”

Madam Tracey watched as he scuttled towards the front door, stopping him briefly to force a fiver into his hand on the instruction that it was for a taxi.

***

*Tadfield village*

The air around her was still, too still as she stood in the centre of the village, eyes darting around for any sign of anything out of the ordinary. Her ears rang with the bugle call from heaven, the call to arms for all angels to take position in the war they thought was coming.

Sophia sniffed at the thought, not on her watch. She’d be damned if she saw another war like the last one, the memory sending shivers down her spine. She could still remember the screams of those she had once called friends as they plummeted to hell… One particular scream causing her to snarl and shake her head free of the thoughts.

“Not again… Never again”

As a weak act of rebellion she turned her face up towards the heavens and stuck her tongue out, stretching an arm upwards and flicking the bird in heavens general direction.

“Sophia? Why are you making rude gestures at the sky?”

Well this was awkward she thought as she turned to face Adam and his gang, not failing to notice that their attention was instantly drawn to her eye, trying to formulate the best response to Wensleydale’s question. How do you explain to a group of eleven year old children that your cussing at heaven because they’re planning a war with hell to end all things and you’ve honestly had enough of their bullshit? She opted for a bright smile and a lie, so much easier.

“Oh, no reason really, had a call from my bosses back home and felt like venting”

Ok, so not quite a lie, just a child friendly and greatly less complicated version of the truth.

“What happened to your eye?”

Adam was staring at her intently, their eyes locked on each other in a silent battle of will as it felt like he was trying to dig directly into her thoughts. She gave a soft chuckle and scratched her head, best to play ditzy for this one.

“I must have forgotten to put my contact in this morning. It’s called Coloboma, it’s a genetic condition, so the pupil in my left eye is misshaped and looks like a cat’s eye”

Adam didn’t look entirely convinced but it was enough that the others seemed to buy it, causing Adam to shrug in acceptance, as they nodded in understanding and Pepper piped up enthusiastically.

“Well I think you shouldn’t hide it; it suits you. I like your new outfit by the way, way better than the all-white clothes you normally wear, your hair is cool too”

“Thank you pepper, I felt like changing things up a bit”

She turned her face back up to the sky for a moment, the rally call growing louder in her ears as she sent a menacing thought in reply. ‘shove those bugles up your arse!’. Adam was still staring at her but now with a pleasant smile on his face that seemed to worry Sophia.

“We’re heading to the forest; do you want to join us Sophia? It’ll be way better than worrying about your bosses”

Sophia paused for a minute, something about the offer sending red flags flying through her mind as she gave an answering smile and shook her head.

“Sorry Adam, but I’ve got a few things to sort out today”

A harsh wind whipped against her face as Adam’s smile dropped and was replaced with a hauntingly empty expression. Pepper, Brian and Wensleydale shielded their faces from the sudden gust, worried looks on their faces as the skies above seemed to darken ominously as Sophia raised her hands in gentle surrender. Better to appease the anti-Christ than start his wrath before she had time to counter it.

“How about I meet you all there when I’ve finished my work? I should only be a few hours”

That seemed to do the trick as the weather brightened and Adam gave a cheerful smile, agreeing before continuing on his way with the Them. She gave a huff of relief, that had been too close.

“And that wasn’t even close to what he could do”

***

*Aziraphale’s bookshop*

He wrung his hands as the communication closed, the blue symbol still blazing on the floor as he gave a nervous ‘hello’ just to double check that the Metatron was no longer listening before going into a full state of panic. What was he meant to do now? The day was here, and heaven were in no mind to listen to reason on forgetting the war. He couldn’t take another war; he’d grown soft in his six thousand years with humanity. He loved this world with all it’s delicious cuisine, lovely music and excellent literature. He sighed, looking around at the vast collection of all the written works he’d collected over the years. How could he ever hope to find this kind of happiness in heaven.

“And I’d never see Crowley again… or Sophia”

He was beginning to deeply regret not going with the demon now. Alpha Centauri really wasn’t a bad place to make a fresh start. He jumped at the sound of the shop door slamming, readying himself to turn a customer away only to be met by the deranged glare of a certain associate.

“Ah, Sergeant Shadwell”

“You foul fiend! Tricking innocent women into your den of evil!”

Aziraphale felt a little dumbfounded at the statement, the only woman he’d ever invited into his living space had been Sophia and he was pretty certain she was far from innocent. He gave a flustered smile as he clasped his hands together and attempted to appear amiable.

“Oh, I think you have the wrong shop there, dear boy”

Shadwell wasn’t listening as he began to rummage around the shop, sending suspicious glares towards the confused angel as he spoke.

“I will exorcize ye foul demon! Just need to find the right tools… Ah, bell!”

He tinkled the little bell by the front door before shuffling closer towards Aziraphale, causing the angel to send panicked eyes towards the heavenly gateway that lit of between them, moving to try and block the crazed man from stepping onto it as Shadwell grabbed for Agnes’ book of prophecies, waving it at the other.

“Book!”

“Please, do see sense! Don’t step…”

Shadwell reached into his pocket, pulling out a dented zip-lighter and waved it at Aziraphale, drawing closer and causing the fair haired angel to back up with each approaching step.

“Not quite a candle but it’ll do! I cast ye out…”

“Oh for the love of! Listen to me you stupid man!”

“To hence with which you came, to trouble never more!”

Aziraphale grimaced at the man who currently waved a grubby finger at him, pointing like his life depended on it, before a terrible realisation hit him. He’d taken one too many steps back, his feet now firmly planted in the circle he’d been trying to protect Shadwell from, the light now gathering around him as a look of mixed exasperation and annoyance filled his face and, for the first time in a long time, he properly swore.

“Oh… Fuck!”

Shadwell watched in stunned amazement as Aziraphale was drawn upwards before bursting into a thousand shards of light. Had he done that? He turned his awed gaze towards the finger that he’d been pointing with before, brain addled beyond it’s usual standard, fleeing from the shop and knocking a burning candle over without looking to see as it caught its flame on the scrolls scattered along the floor.

***

*A quiet country road beside the forest of Tadfield*

Newton couldn’t help the goofy smile on his lips as he trundled down the narrow country roads towards Tadfield, excited to be out on his own in such a beautiful part of the country and ecstatic not to be locked up in a musty old flat with a deranged Scotsman yelling about nipples.

Of course he was going to investigate the strange circumstances that had first drawn his attention, but surely, he could do that over a nice cold pint in the local pubs beer garden. Of course he could, what better way to talk to the locals about the village than in their local.

“Great plan young Pulsifer! Aye laddie, go get pished in the local”

He chuckled at his poor attempt at Shadwell’s accent before giving a startled yelp and yanking the steering wheel of his Japanese Wasabi model car, the airbags inflating and completely obscuring his view as he lost control and the tin can he lovingly named ‘Dick Turpin’ lifted onto it’s side before rolling with a bang onto its roof.

Newton felt his head spin as he pulled himself out of the driver’s side door, hands grabbing him to help his escape as he turned confused eyes back towards the road, just to check that he hadn’t been seeing things and crashed his beloved car for no reason.

There, in the middle of the, otherwise serene, country road was a massive hole. That alone was worrying enough that it had appeared before his very eyes like a sink hole, what was more disturbing, and perplexing was the fact that two heads popped out of it cautiously, looking around and darting back down when they saw that Newton was staring back at them. He may have been wrong, he usually was, but judging by the hats and clothing they wore, they appeared to be Tibetan… What the HELL were Tibetan’s doing in hole’s in the ground?  
“I told you Tibetan’s were tunnelling underground!”

“Car’s always burst into flame’s in the movies when they roll”

Newton felt like his head was going to explode as he tried to focus on the four faces peering at him, their voices definitely belonged to children, but he couldn’t see straight with the black spots flashing through his vision.

“Oh shut up Brian, of course they do that in movies, but in real life it’s not likely and you shouldn’t want to see it!”

“Well that’s boring!”

Adam rolled his eyes as Pepper and Brian continued to bicker, himself and Wensleydale taking the man’s limp arms over their shoulder to help him sit up. They’d take him to Anathema, she was the closest friendly face that would willingly help them other than Sophia, but Sophia had said she was busy, so Anathema was the best shot.

“Are you ok?”

Newton could see that one of the children was speaking to him, but the words seemed to scramble in his head, maybe he’d taken a worse knock than he’d thought. He tried to give a smile, swaying slightly as he attempted to point at his wrecked car, mumbling as he fought to stay upright.

“My car’s called Dick Turpin… You’re probably wondering why, well…”

He’d waited so long to explain why he had named his car. Shame that he promptly keeled backwards and fainted as the moment had finally arisen.

***

*Outside Aziraphale’s bookshop*

The Bentley came to a jarring halt as Crowley’s eyes took in the sight before him, throwing the door open and stepping out as a human firefighter came running towards him, stopping just short at the terrifying expression on the red heads face.

“Sir, is this your bookshop?”

Crowley snarled as he pushed the human out of the way, almost knocking him clean to the floor as he marched towards the inferno that engulfed Aziraphale’s precious bookshop.

“Do I look like a bookshop owner to you!”

With a snap of his fingers, the door flung open and he was engulfed by the flames within, another snap of his fingers closing and locking the door behind him as human voices screamed in horror at his actions. 

“AZIRAPHALE!”

Everything lay in ruins around him, all those books now curling in the heat of the blaze that devoured them, ancient parchments collected over the course of human history sending plumes of smoke and adding to the hell that surrounded him, lost forever like the library of Alexander. But they meant nothing to Crowley, the only thing that mattered to Crowley failed to answer as he continued to scream his name.

“Dammit angel, where are you!”

He’d come back with the intension of truly apologising again, with his tail between his legs as he swore to never leave his remaining angel ever again. How could he? He lov… he was fon… Aziraphale was his best friend. He roared with anger as it began to settle in his mind that he’d not get the reply he wanted to his calls… He’d lost both his friends.

“They killed him! YOU BASTARDS!”

A jet of water broke through the front window, hitting Crowley hard in the chest and knocking him to the floor as his roar became more murderous and he slammed a fist into the floor.

“They killed both my best friends! I’ll kill them, I rip them to fucking SHREDS!”

Something caught his attention from the corner of his eye. A single book, only slightly singed at the corners and he couldn’t help but snatch for it and hold it to his chest, vaguely registering the title that read ‘The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter’. It was the only thing in the shop that wasn’t burning away to nothing and it was the only thing he could grab as a memory of the bookish angel.

His shade’s sizzled on his face and began to melt with the surrounding heat, dripping from his face, but he failed to notice as he threw himself back onto his feet, book clutched tight, and flung the front door open once more, almost tearing it from its hinges.

With a snap of his fingers, a fresh pair of shades were placed back over his serpentine eyes and, ignoring the desperate yells from the surrounding humans to stop and get checked over, he stormed back to his Bentley, a wave of murderous sorrow filling him as his mind went blank.

“What’s the fucking point… No bookworm or renegade to fight for now…”

He was driving before he really registered what he was doing, a pub on the outskirts of Soho coming into view as he raced at ninety down the streets, failing to register the disembodied voice that tried to yell his voice or the faint wisp of a bowtie that could occasionally could be seen in his rear view mirror.


	14. Chapter 14

“… ‘Hic’ It’s not like I meant to fall… Minding my own business and then… heyyy it’s Lucifer and the gang… next thing I know I’m doing a free fall into pits of fire and sulphur… Didn’t mean for it to happen, just ‘hic’ asked too many questions”

Two empty bottles of Jameson’s sat in front of him, a third one quickly on the decline, shades a little crooked as he leaned back in his chair and cursed everything in existence for the hand he had been dealt.

He should have taken his chance centuries ago to claim his angels, should have grasped for the little touch of happiness that had been dangled before him. But he hadn’t, he’d thought that he was lucky just to have his two angels acknowledge him.

His mind fogged slightly further at the memory of two plump arses, one in a skirt and the other in out-dated trousers, his hands itching to grab a handful but seeming to miss whenever he tried. Crowley had always been an arse man, he appreciated the rest of the body, but hell there was something about the arses of two particular beings that really got his engines going. He sighed, more in annoyance than pure out grief. What good was grief now, they were GONE.

“…ley”

He grumbled as a broken off word filled his ears, shakily pouring himself another generous shot. Great, he was hearing things now.

“Crowley!”

His eyes shot up, almost falling from his sockets as the projection of Aziraphale glared at him disapprovingly. Shit, he’d never seen the prim and proper angel look so vexed as he flickered before his eyes.

“Finally dear boy, I’ve been trying to get your attention since you were driving”

“Angel! You’re… You…”

“Yes, a minor inconvenience, but no time for that. You must get to Tadfield!”

Crowley blinked, fingers edging towards the full glass of whisky as the angel tried to, and failed, to knock his hand away. He was here, discorporated, but still here in a phantom form… did that mean? Aziraphale seemed to catch his train of thought, giving a sad shake of his head.

“She’s not up there Crowley… She seems to truly be gone. But we don’t have time, I told you, you must get to Tadfield, the anti-Christ is there! Dammit all demon, SOBER UP!”

Crowley jumped slightly at the tone the angel used, powerful and filled with his true divinity. It was kind of arousing. Crowley swayed as he catalogued the information away for another time, as he tried to talk.

“Angel… I thought you were dead… Your bookshop, it was burning”

The look of sorrow that filled the angels face was enough to cripple as he bit his lower lip and tried to soldier on with his self-given mission.

“Ah… Well, there was a book in there. The nice and…”

“Accurate prophecies of Agnes Nutter!”

Both looked at each other with joy as Crowley pulled the book from his jacket like a trophy, pointing at the title excitedly.

“I grabbed a souvenir!”

“Oh you beautiful fiend! I made side notes!”

Crowley fought against the stirring in his trousers that the praise enacted within him, blaming the excessive alcohol consumption for the blush that rose in his cheeks. He’d always rather enjoyed being praised by his angels.

“You must go to where I have indicated… I will find a receptive body… It’s a shame that I can’t share yours”

For a moment they simply stared at each other, the implication of what those words could mean not failing to hit them as a memory of their shared time in the Bentley resurfaced in their mind as Aziraphale gave a dainty clear of his throat and allowed Crowley a get out card.

“But we’d likely explode if we took it so far… no, I shall meet you at the airfield, that is where I have deduced it will happen”

Crowley scrabbled to get himself together as Aziraphale faded from view in search of a body, forcing the alcohol back out of his system before pocketing the three full bottles of Jameson’s once more for a later occasion before grabbing the book once more and making a break for the door, he had somewhere to be, for the sake of an angel.

***

*Jasmine Cottage*

Anathema stood by her kitchen sink, nursing a cup of tea as she gave a final glance over the medical supplies laid out upon the counter. Plasters, bandages and disinfectant, all she would need for what Agnes had warned her of.

A bang at the front door alerted her to the moment as she dashed forward and pulled it open, Adam and his gang helping an unconscious man through the thresh hold and into the kitchen.

She felt a little disappointed. He was hardly the tall, dark and handsome stranger she had hope for. More a lanky beanpole of a man with glasses and a pasty complexion that had Anathema worried for his health.

“Were you expecting us?”

Adam was eying the laid out medical supplies on the kitchen counter as he held Newton loosely on his shoulder, Wensleydale taking the other half of the man’s weight with a grimace, sending a suspicious look towards the witch as she shrugged and placed a well-practiced smile on her lips.

“I was given a warning, now place him on my bed and I will make sure he gets well”

Adam acknowledged the cryptic message that passed with Anathema’s words as he and the Them helped Newton onto the bed in the other room before moving back towards the kitchen, watching Anathema busy herself with treating the man’s head injury before joining them once more.

Adam was staring at a sketching that she had placed upon her kitchen wall, glaring at it with enough intensity that he could have almost caught the paper aflame.

“Right, well I need to get off home, my mum and dad will want me back”

“Me too”

Anathema watched in stunned fear as Adam’s head snapped around, a dead look in his eyes as he viewed his friends, a sudden feeling of dread washing over her as, for a single moment, she caught the face of Sophia in her kitchen window. The angel looked grave as she walked past, eyes shut and seemingly oblivious to the path she walked, before vanishing into nothing like she had never been there. If Anathema squinted, she could swear she’d seen a trace of silver wings at the angel’s back.

“I didn’t say you could go”

Despite his dead expression, Adam’s voice was filled with anger and malice, causing his friends to shrink back as they edged towards the door, disappearing behind it before making a run for it, destined for home as they tried to get away from the frightening presence that had once been their leader. 

Anathema watched in feared confusion as Adam and Dog followed them out, seeming to disappear in the doorway as a voice filled her ears and she found herself unable to decline the orders the voice gave.

“Don’t worry, my dear Anathema. Attend to your young man in his time of need… Love is on your side… Come to your destiny when both sides of your heart are committed”

*On the M25*

Crowley cursed at the traffic before him, regretting the day that he had helped turn the M25 into the demonic trap that it was today. When he had done his little bit of fiddling, he’d intended it to simply be a low grade level of annoyance that would slowly trickle souls into hell and give him a little more time to simply enjoy the time he spent with his angels without the interference of work. Now, it was turning out to be a completely unpleasant pain in the arse. A circle of flame, created for pure destruction, encased the road he was trying to take.

“What will you do now traitor!”

He sneered at the embodiment of Hastur that appeared within his beloved Bentley, casting hateful eyes upon him and sullying the integrity of his beloved car as he hissed in response.

“Watch me, you bastard. I’ll show you what I’m capable of”

The beautiful thing about Crowley, that set him apart from other demons, was his ability to have an imagination. His foot hit the acceleration as he turned into the hard shoulder, Hastur’s screams fuelling him on as the duke of hell screamed that he’d destroy himself, the flames of the M25 engulfing the Bentley, before evacuating himself to hell for self-preservation. 

“That’s where your wrong… I believe there’s an angel waiting at the end of hell’s damnation. At the end of the flame, at the end of this pain, there’s someone waiting for me to be his reason, just like they were my reason. I only have one angel left to me now, but he’s not dead and that’s enough to make me say… FUCK YOU!”

His foot hit harder on the acceleration and all his imagination went into keeping the Bentley going, despite the inferno that licked at the flesh of his corporeal form, that stripped the paint from its body and burnt the rubber from its tyres. He had a reason to keep going and to hell with anyone that would stand in his way.

***

*With Sophia, abstract from the human eye*

She cursed as she hurried away from the witches window. Now wasn’t a time for fondness to get the better of her. She’d detached from her human form, her intention to follow Adam until the end, but then she had seen the fear in Anathema’s eyes through the kitchen window of Jasmine cottage and she’d faltered, taking a solid form for a moment to give the other woman a sense of peace before disappearing, her words passing into the human’s mind as she faded back to nothing.

“Shit shit shit!”

She now had three children running from the cottage, all looking as if they had seen the face of true terror.

“Maybe they have”

Her musings were proven correct as Adam emerged from the cottage, an empty look on his face that had Sophia worrying her lower lip in fear. She took a moment to look at Dog, the hell hounds eyes flashing upon her own as she gave a signal of ‘hush’, thankful as he obeyed, and she followed behind Adam down the road, her guard up constantly as she tried to stay hidden. It wasn’t an easy feat for any angel or demon to mask everything about themselves. Forget hiding from heaven, that was easy compared to this. Ignorant bastards had been lax for centuries.

‘Sophia… You know he is the anti-Christ… So why not end him now before his power is strongest? Don’t you want to end this war?’

Sophia paused in her chase, the voice filling her mind causing a moment of lapse as she fought with the two sides of her own being.

“My lord… I cannot kill a child; I cannot kill Adam. Children are the light of humanities future. The pasts mistakes are corrected by future generations… Adam, he is good. He cared for me when I was weakened, he has never left my side… I WON’T believe this child could ever destroy your creation… I won’t believe he could destroy anything”

‘But what if he has lied to you? Sophia, angel of love and all that is pure, what if you cannot see passed your own goodness?’

Sophia froze. A memory filled her mind, one she wished to keep secret, a child that had truly changed her thoughts, so many millennia ago, made her realised that heaven could be as cruel as it was kind. She turned her face up towards where she thought the voice came from, speaking with all the conviction she could muster.

“My lord… You have been absent too long. Love is neither clean nor is it filthy… Love is what causes a human heart to fight on, it’s also what causes it to give its final beat. Love isn’t a singular feeling. It means many things to everyone that has fallen too it. Love isn’t either pure or tainted, it is whatever you choose to make it. Love isn’t solely romantic, nor is it held only for family or friends.

Love is the tears a mother and father shed when they hold their new born, joyful and full of hope. But it is also the tears a mother and father sheds when they see their child taken too soon, painful and full of sorrow. No parent should ever have to bury their child, and yet it happens far too often.

Love is the man or woman working to the bone to put food in the bellies of their family. It’s hard work, it feels like no one notices the struggles you are going through to make a difference in even the smallest way. But it’s also the wife or husband, the son or daughter who sees the hard work and tries to take a little more of the burden to help. It’s deep and it is endless.

Love is not only for another person, but also for yourself. Its breaking away from a toxic relationship, whether that is family, friend or lover, and realising that you must love yourself first and, by loving yourself for all your strengths and weaknesses, you invite a love into your life that nourishes you and helps you to overcome all the challenges you may face. You are never alone when you have love for yourself.

Love is a child not seeing the cruelty of the world, not seeing the difference in skin, religion or sexuality. It is innocent and able to see the light. Love is the adult that chooses to see past discrimination, chooses to look past the hateful words and accept the stranger before them, regardless of religion, skin, gender or sexuality. Love has the ability to open your arms to everyone, to heal and see a better future.

Love is neither good nor evil. It is what you choose to do with it that makes the greatest difference. Love is both painful and peaceful. It is having your heartbroken by your first partner, taking that pain and becoming stronger, realising who you truly are and finding a lover that understands and reciprocates your own desires.

Love is neither made from heaven or hell. It is both. Love is like humanity, neither perfectly good nor perfectly evil. Love is the strength that finds the balance between both.”

Sophia took a moment to breath, startled slightly that her wings had been drawn out against her own will, shining silver as a sense of peace she had never known before passed over her and final words passed over her lips.

“I know that Adam can do no evil, because I can feel his love, his love fuels everything around him, despite the evil that tries to sway him… I know that he holds ME in his heart because he was raised with only love and understanding… He was raised with humanity at its finest… I will fight, I will believe that this boy can do no true evil”

There was silence as the world around her stood frozen, her face fierce and all the passion within her being exploding out as she waited for the words of the almighty.

‘So you finally understand, Sophia? Do you understand the great plan now?’

“Better than any of your archangel’s ever could”

The world around her began to move once more, Sophia propelling forward behind the children that Adam followed, intent on proving her point to the almighty who had, apparently, placed her trust within the her. Adam was a being of Love. Sophia was going to prove it.

‘Sophia… Your curse is your blessing. Do not prove me wrong in preventing your fall’


	15. Chapter 15

When Shadwell had collapsed onto the soft comfort of Madam Tracey’s bed, exhausted from his scuffle with the ‘demon’ scum, he had not expected to wake to the voice of said demon scum making chit chat with HIS harlot.

“I won’t tell ye again demon! Leave this jezebel be! Or I’ll smite ye to kingdom come!”

He’d burst through the living room door, brandishing his sacred finger, to find Madam Tracey sat alone in front of a small table mirror, the woman in question turning to him with a quirked eyebrow and a questionable smirk on her face.

“That’s the thing Mr. S, it is coming. And it’s coming now”

He opened his mouth to say something but closed it straight away. He’d heard him, he was sure of it as he seemed unable to lower his precious finger from pointing towards the harlot.

“I heard him, where is he? Southern pansy”

A flicker passed through Tracey’s eyes as a coy grin filled her lips and another voice filled the room, nearly toppling Shadwell over in shock and genuine fear.

“Not just any southern pansy, sergeant Shadwell. THE southern pansy!”

And there’s a smugness in that well-spoken voice, a flicker in the eyes of madam Tracey that has Shadwell recoiling even further as it becomes clear to him. Witches are the least of his problem.

Aziraphale smiled through the face of the woman he had possessed, enjoying this sudden breech of hell’s territory as he began, with the help of Madam Tracey, to explain the situation to the confused madman before them.

***

*Above Tadfield*

“Not good, shit shit shit! Not good at all!”

Sophia had taken to the air, eyes scanning the expanse of Tadfield as she tried to hunt out the four children that had vanished from her view, using the last spare portion of her angelic power to send a calling beacon to heaven. Despite all the years of fighting against heaven to give humanity a bloody break, Sophia still had her allies dedicated to her alone. She gave a quick quirk of her lip before ending her own battle cry towards heaven and grimacing once more as she tried to pin point the children that eluded her sight.

“How the fuck did I lose them?”

They’d been right in front of her, she was certain! But then she’d turned a corner and three frightened children, a micro-sized hell hound, and an over-powered anti-Christ had disappeared. Sophia snarled, as she cast frantic eyes around as she desperately tried to find them.

“So Sophia… Looks like you failed”

Her wings stood rigid at the smug voice, a look of pure rage and menace on her face as she turned towards the source of the voice. For the first time in all her long existence, Sophia looked truly demonic as her right eye began to flicker towards the shade of it’s sibling, her lips pulled back in a snarl as she faced the one that she hated above all. She’d go full demonic if she needed to. No longer was she afraid of falling if that was what the all-mighty wished of her. If she had to throw herself away for what she loved, then so be it.

“I told the all-mighty, you weren’t worth pulling from the edge. Weak little thing you were back then, all temper and no back bone, coming up to heaven yelling for all to hear when you didn’t like the decisions we made, when you didn’t like how we made your beloved humans suffer. We all laughed at you, especially when you were discorporated and tried to hide that eye of yours. I suggested you were better kept in heaven, that you’d be better servicing the other angel’s… But the all mighty, well she thought you were worth something. That you deserved your role of spreading love”

Gabriel was grinning as he swaggered towards her, not caring as Sophia seemed to fume before him, confident in his own strength above her own. She’d never felt this level of rage before. Not when she’d watched the arc, not when she’d watched them nail Jesus to that blasted crucifix… No, this was a rage that fed off all she had seen and bottled. The scent of a brazen bull, she’d not been brave enough to pull the man free… Sandalphon had told her that God willed his death to become a martyr. The screams of a child as a mother was raped in front of her child… Michael had told her that the Vikings would be fodder for the Christian crusade…. The cries of millions as world war one and two raged below and she was trapped in heaven because Gabriel refused to let her go… Her tears falling free as she felt all their pain and wished, prayed for it to stop, watching as souls were brought to heaven before their time… Why did they need to suffer? … Sophia loved humanity, with all her damned being. Her pain was humanities pain… Love could not survive in a world of pain and hatred.

And yet the world… humanity, always seemed to fight back, even when she was at her weakest… calling to her and sending her the very thing she needed to survive. LOVE. She always seemed to claw back. And now she realised why. Money and war may make the world turn… but love made it breath, made it’s heart pump blood and fed it’s little human’s the power to fight on. Love made life worth fighting for. Love for a cause. Love for another… Love for yourself. The world thrived on love and would continue to do so.

“Do you think we didn’t realise you were working to stop this war, that we didn’t realise you were a traitor? Pathetic little creature you are, stuck between heaven and hell like the abomination you truly are, you couldn’t even throw Raphael down without crying”

Something inside Sophia snapped as she surged forward and pummelled a fist into Gabriel’s face, sending the smug bastard flying backwards as she chased him, a look of horror in his eyes as her right eye settled back to human and the left, demonic eye glared down at him with all the hate and anger she had in her body and very being. She realised now; she was love in all it’s forms. She was never meant to be pure or evil. She was meant to be the bridge that allowed human’s to make their own choice… The bridge between heaven and hell. God’s final judgement upon the soul… And that came with a price.

“You can call me whatever the fuck you like, but his name isn’t Raphael anymore! It’s Crowley! And he’s worth more than anything you will ever be!”

Her knee planted down into his chest as Gabriel tried to throw her off, unable as a force unknown to him held her in place above him and her fist continued to smash into him, her other hand wrapped in his hair as she snarled.

“His name is Crowley! He helped me teach the humans what a wheel is! And Aziraphale helped me part the red FUCKING sea when you lazy bastards just wanted to watch those humans suffer! They’re my fucking back bone and you can feel the fist that BACK BONE powers!”

A scream filled her ears from the distance, and she pulled her punch back, head snapping to the side with eyes wide with mania. Pepper’s scream, coming from the forest, she should have known Adam would take them there. She stood, keeping a foot planted on Gabriel as she turned fierce eyes upon him.

“You’re right. I am a traitor, but at least I know what it means to love. At least I’m ready to give my all to save what means the world to me… I’m a traitor because god allowed me to realise my full potential at my own pace… I am still the one who threw a piece of my heart into hell, I am still a warrior of heaven… But what does that make you? Nothing more than a randy prick with no brain of his own… You are nothing but talk, Gabriel… You wouldn’t know the first thing about fighting for a true cause”

She sent a final kick to the archangel before racing towards the source of the scream as it went eerily quiet and she felt the world shift around her, signalling that Gabriel had returned to the blank walls where he belonged and that something, here on earth, was completely out of order to how it should have been.

“I haven’t lost yet. Not by a long shot”

For a single moment, Sophia took a glance towards the flaming ring that had become the M25, a single black spot shooting through it, her eyes unable to move from it for the briefest of moments. She didn’t really know why, but she blew a kiss towards the black spot. Something just told her to do it as she carried on her projectile towards the forest.

***

*A rickety little moped on the streets of Soho*

“Sorry to be a nag… but can this velocipede go any faster?”

Madam Tracey could all but feel the entity sharing her body biting and worrying his lower lip as they and Shadwell trundled along on the little moped at little more than 10mph. It had been a gift from her niece well over a decade ago, just something to help her get about a little easier. Even in it’s prime, it had struggled to go over 20mph.

“Well… I suppose with the added weight; this is the best we can hope for”

Aziraphale took a moment to take control of the human’s body, sending a scathing look at the man who clutched for dear life to the woman before him. This was his fault! If he hadn’t arrived when he did, if Aziraphale hadn’t needed to save the man from stepping into the blasted circle, he’d have been able to make his own way towards Tadfield. What could he do now? For a moment, Sophia and Crowley flashed in his mind, mischievous grins on their faces as they whispered in his mind.

‘Speed it up, angel’

Of course! He didn’t have a body of his own, but he still had his angelic abilities. Through the mouth of Madam Tracey, his prim and proper tone took on a moment of confidence.

“Hold on Sergeant Shadwell, we’re going to go much faster!”

Madam Tracey gave a little shriek of surprise as the old moped began to shudder, it’s exhaust fumes turning a pale shade of blue as it began to reach a speed it had never known, it’s tires beginning to bounce upon the tarmac before taking off completely and soaring above the London skyline. Aziraphale gave a pleased little chuckle as Shadwell clung on even tighter, the thunder gun jammed between the two human bodies.

“And that is the power of a MINOR angelic miracle sergeant Shadwell! Angelic, not demonic!”

Aziraphale would be lying if he said he didn’t feel a little smug as the grown man clinging to Madam Tracey gave a full shriek at his words, the rickety old moped shooting like a bullet towards the end of the world. Well, hopefully not the end.

*Within a blazing inferno on the M25*

At this point in time, Crowley could feel his throat growing horse and his mind running rampant as the Bentley powered through the flames of his own design. He imagined that his Bentley felt no ill effect from the unholy fire around them, that his tires were not running solely on their rims or that the very integrity of its structure had not been decimated with the heat.

He imagined that he couldn’t feel the flames licking at his own skin as his eyes focused on the road before him. He HAD to meet Aziraphale at the air space, he’d made a bloody promise and he’d be damned a second time if he failed his bookish angel again.

He imagined, leading the way for his Bentley, the lone figure of Aziraphale… His prize at the end of the road, his final reason to really fight against Armageddon. Yet something drew his eye skyward and maybe he was going slightly insane in these final hours, but he was certain he could see the figure of Sophia soaring through the sky also, above his own destination. Maybe it was his imagination going the extra mile, but she seemed different to his memory. A short, red and black tartan skirt flapped around her thighs and a black blouse hugged her breasts in a way he’d always hoped to see. Sophia would never choose to where anything but white or close variations, angels could be fussy like that he had realised. Definitely his imagination, but he was going to cling to the memory as her visage turned to face him briefly, sending a kiss his way and fuelling the fire within his own mind further.

A brief memory flickered through his mind… Blazing steel armour, tears falling from beautiful green eyes as arms pulled her back and a wisp of whitish blond hair faded from his view as he fell… A woman, flaming hair… Whispering she was sorry.

***

*The forest of Tadfield*

“Stop it Adam! Just stop it!”

Pepper could feel her eyes stinging as tears threatened and she screamed at the boy who had always been their leader and friend… The boy she had imagined being her first kiss. Brian and Wensleydale were by her side but neither felt able to make words as she tried to stand for all of them, Dog was whining at her feet as he lamented the lack of bitches in hell and the lack of new and wonderful scents to discover. Dog didn’t want Armageddon now that he knew the excitement of earth.

Adam had beat them to the forest, Pepper didn’t know how, but he had, and he had begun ranting about making the world anew, making it better with no other humans but themselves… He’d make them new parents. His new friends were coming to meet him, and they would help him make this world better. Pepper couldn’t help but feel that Adam had no idea what he was doing. None of them had any clue what he was doing in this moment.

“Shut up! My new friends will be better than you anyway! They’ll help me make this world how it should be!”

The three frightened children watched on as a scream ripped from Pepper’s throat and Adam’s eyes turned manic, flitting frantically around his skull as if scanning all the earth in one. It was a horrifying sight.

“Yes! But you three will be safe, you’ll be my generals. Wensleydale will rule Asia… Brian will rule all of the America’s and Pepper will rule all of Europe and Africa!”

Adam felt crazed as his mind began to split the earth between his three friends. They were his truest friends, even if they didn’t like his ideals now. They’d love having something in return for all their years by his side, surely.

Wensleydale froze for a moment, his mind pinpointing something very important amongst what Adam had just said as he took a tentative step forward, motioning for pepper to stay calm as he spoke, not all that certain of himself against the powerhouse that Adam had become.

“And what will you take, Adam? Where will you rule?”

Adam seemed to freeze at his words, a moment of uncertainty filling his eyes as he took a second to think over the question. Surely it was obvious.

“Is it obvious though, Adam?”

The earth seemed to swirl up around their feet and the three human children turned, their eyes widening further in shock but their hearts seeming to slow into peace at the visage of Sophia behind them, eyes trained solely upon Adam. She looked completely normal, exactly as they had seen her only a few hours earlier, short red hair and tartan skirt with a black shirt… But now wings of brilliant silver curled from her back and moved to encircle them within their safety… A safety that none of them could deny, she would fight to keep them safe… the love radiating from her seeming to make it undeniable. Adam seemed less confused by Sophia’s appearance as he tried to muddle together his answer.

“Well, I’ll have Tadfield. I’ve always just wanted Tadfield”

“But what if that’s what they’ve only ever wanted also? What if this, right here and now, as it is, without the end of everything, is all that your FRIENDS ever wanted!”

Sophia gave a glance towards Pepper, seeming to will the young girl on as she stepped out from the shelter of Sophia’s wings and added her own voice to the argument once more.

“We love Tadfield too! We don’t want anything more than what we have now, we don’t want new parents because we LOVE the one’s we have now. We don’t want anything to change! We just want to grow up with you, and watch the world become a better place in a way that isn’t going to kill billions!”

Adam clutched his skull, his jaw falling slack as an unearthly scream drew from his throat and seemed to span the whole world as his body was forced upwards, seeming to engulf him within the sheer power that lay within his being. Sophia watched him rise for a moment before launching herself from the ground, appearing behind the screaming child as she placed her hands upon his shoulders and gritted her teeth in pain against the sheer malice that seemed to engulf him, desperately trying to fight against the tide with her own angelic being and help the trapped boy within the maelstrom to break free.

“Adam… Find the love in your heart, remember all the times you’ve spent with your friends and with your parents… Hold me now in your heart and realise… This world is still worth a second chance”

His screaming grew silent as he began to drift downwards, Sophia following him as her hands remained firmly upon his shoulders and the pain began to subside, giving way to strongest wave of love she had ever felt, her eyes glowing with the force as they touched the ground once more and Adam seemed to regain his senses, his attention for his friends only.

“I’m alright now… I’m sorry”

The Them rushed to their leader and Sophia stumbled back to give them room as they clutched to each other, the wave of love hitting her like a freight train as something began to stir… Something that she’d long forgotten.

“Meet me in the village centre, get your bikes… We’re going to the end of the world, it’s not far”

Adam and his friends made to leave the forest clearing, expecting Sophia to follow them only to turn and find the woman on her knees, those silver wings glowing as her eyes glazed over and her jaw hung slack. Their simple looked back upon her, filled with concern and, dear god, so much love that seemed to be the final fuel to the fire that had engulfed her.

“Sophia… what…?”

Sophia seemed unable to hear them as her body was enveloped by a blinding light, forcing the children to shelter their eyes as the woman before them began to alter and change, her clothing changing from tartan skirt and black blouse to steel and satin.

When the light died and they were able to finally look at Sophia once more, the woman before them seemed nothing like the kind person they had known. Now she was clad in a steel breastplate, her toned stomach on display and her voluptuous hips cocooned in steel… Pepper could only describe them as knickers really… and a long cape of pure satin, almost sheer flowed from her shoulders… a face engraved upon the material in blood… hands clad in greaves of the same steel and her feet bare upon the grass upon the forest floor, wild flowers seeming to bloom around each uncertain step she took. Her hair, short only a moment ago, was once again flowing down to her hips, like a brilliant flame, and fluttering upon a wind that only seemed to dance around Sophia. The wings had vanished, but the children felt that was more by choice than anything else.

“Sophia… Are you ok?”

They couldn’t hold her eye as she turned to face them. They burnt into their very soul, almost as if she could trace both their past and future with a single glance… But they could look upon her smile. Filled with kindness and love as a steel hand took a moment each to cup their faces, lingering finally upon Adam.

“I am well, stronger than ever, in fact, with the help of yourselves… And I am so sorry that you have been forced to see my true form. No human should be forced to see such a sight… The divine is not so easily stomached. I wish that I could have stayed your simple friend… Adam, I am so proud of you… Now go, I shall never leave your side”

Adam shot his eyes to her own and she couldn’t stop herself from hugging him close, the only human able to look within her true forms eyes and not be driven insane.

“My sweet Adam… You were raised with me in your heart, your parents made sure of it… And I will stay by your side, just as you first wished when I came to Tadfield”

“Sophia… Who the hell are you?”

She smiled at Pepper’s confused question as the young child finally turned her eyes upon her own and seemed to faulter at the sight. So strong… So full of everything that created Sophia… No wonder she could fight to hold her gaze. She took a step backwards and, once more, her wings broke free, each wing spanning twelve feet as she sent a wave of her very being out towards the world without a second thought, a wave of love gripping the world to fight the mania that Adam, in his moment of crazed evil, had caused as she smiled at the girl and answered her question.

“Dearest Pepper… I am Sophia, angel of love… And the leader of the Seraphim choir of heaven… And I will see you at the end of the world… I will protect the world that my boys and I fell so deeply in love with”


	16. Chapter 16

Anathema let out a deep breath as she adjusted the buttons of her blouse, sending a quick glimpse to the blissed out man who lay upon her bed. It had been a spur of the moment thing as they had discussed the end of the world that was about to happen, freak weather outside and a monstrous scream that sounded like hell itself causing them to hide under the bed as Newton rambled about everything that he had never done, landing upon his regrettable lack of experience with women before Anathema had taken matters into her own hands and chosen to correct at least of the experiences he had never had.

Sure, it had been a brash decision, but she couldn’t even imagine regretting it. She actually rather liked the nervous young man who had literally crashed into her life.

“Can we do that again?”

Newton was looking at her hopefully, clearly eager to relive the experience as many times possible as Anathema finished her buttons and threw a towel in his direction.

“Agnes said we only did it once. The shower is through there, clean up and get dressed, we have to go”

She didn’t want to seem cold, but there really wasn’t room now for sentiment and affection. The end of the world really didn’t leave much room for such emotions.

***

*Riding through the streets of Tadfield*

How could any human describe the moments that elapsed around Pepper, Brian and Wensleydale as they pedalled behind their leader. Before them rode a being built of menace, a being who had only moments ago been ready to end all things. A being that had been their friend for as long as they could remember.

Behind them, gliding on the winds, was a creature they had once thought to be a helpless, granted beautiful, flame haired woman. Brian and Wensleydale hadn’t dared to look into her eyes, the orbs had become like burning rays of light, one dimmer than the other but still searing, compared to the compassionate orbs they had grown so fond of. Pepper fought to look back every now and again, overwhelmed but amazed by the woman as they rode forth.

She seemed to be moving without actually moving a single limb… like a ghost drawing towards it’s haunt as her head lay back skywards and an ethereal cry seemed to echo from her lungs, painful to human ears but strangely beautiful… Mournful almost.

“Pepper…?”

Pepper startled from her observation, not failing to notice that, as she peddled forward with her head turned back, she avoided any obstacles or dangers in her path, a knowing smirk on Sophia’s face that now focused on her fully having snapped back from her unearthly cry.

“Yeah?”

“Didn’t your parents ever tell you it’s rude to stare? Especially at beings like myself”

Sophia gave a hearty laugh as the young girl’s cheeks flared into an embarrassed blush, seeming to appear by her side as she patted her on the shoulder.

“You’ll see stranger beings than me today, little warrior. Don’t freak out so much… Tell Adam that I’ll be with you guys soon. Got one last thing to do before the party starts”

With a wink and a clap of her hands, Sophia was gone, and Pepper couldn’t quite explain where the boost of courage had come from.

***

*A space between time and reality*

Sophia blinked as the brightness burned her left eye, subsiding to white noise. She hadn’t been here in centuries… Her place of solace. Every angel had the ability to create this place, almost like a vacation from their duties without actually having to waste time. A moment in their existence that offered true peace. Outside of this place, nothing changed, time was suspended, and they could reappear where ever they chose.

Sophia had created her serenity during the early 15th century, not long before she’d been discorporated, probably the reason why she hadn’t returned to it since it’s creation. A moment in time that she could relive and enjoy… She’d created it to deal with her fears and her own feelings of love.

The blank space began to alter as her own haven began to manifest. Still completely blank, but now decorated with three beings, clad in silk white robes and wings of purest white and shimmering silver. She felt her heart break at the sight, two heads of flaming hair and one of the most beautiful platinum white… her boys and herself… before he had been thrown down. This was where Sophia chose to hide her full strength… Her weapon. In the time when she had truly felt love of her own at its full potential.

“You three were always together. Before the fall at least… you were always sentimental Sophia”

She turned; eyes wide in horror as they landed upon Uriel, the gold patterns upon her dark skin glinting in the light of her sacred memory. What was she doing here? The angel before her frowned as she flexed her right hand and light began to manifest. No… How had she gotten into this place? How had she lain hands upon her strength?

“You look frightened… Like you’ve seen the first heavenly war once more”

Sophia’s eyes glanced down to the weapon within the others hand. Her mouth felt dry as she formed words.

‘Shut it, Raphael! It’s not my fault I have a bow and arrow!’

The memories words filled the silence between herself and the arch angel Uriel as she took a step forward and did her best to seem strong. Within the others hand was a whip as she inspected it and gave a sad smile.

“You never really did like the bow and arrow. You thought it was too cliché… When did you change it?”

“Around 1087… Just after William the conqueror died. A bow and Arrow didn’t seem to fit me”

Uriel chuckled in an oddly fond way as she lifted the curled whip and looked at it with soft eyes, seeming to ignore the flinch that wracked Sophia’s body at the gesture.

‘Sweet Sophia, there’s nothing wrong with a bow and arrow, you’re a Cherubim after all… the chosen vessel of love, it’s fitting and you’re the best shot in all of the choirs, even the arch angels can’t make a shot like you!’

Aziraphale’s voice filled the air around them. This was her fondest memory, before everything had gone wrong… Before she had lost them.

“He was right, you know. You were a Cherubim first, the chosen vessel for love on our lord’s precious earth… You were chosen for that even before the earth or humanity were ever created and promoted to leader of the Seraphim because you excelled at spreading that very emotion… Better than you know”

Sophia could feel the tears beginning to fill her eyes. This wasn’t a memory for anyone but herself. She’d only shared it so that she could meet with one of her allies… Someone who felt the same as she did so that she could pass on her orders to her followers.

“Why are you here Uriel! This isn’t a place for you… This is a memory for only those I can trust!”

She tried to turn her back on the arch angel, only to find her directly in front of her and whip still held firmly in hand. She trembled as Uriel reached her free hand towards her face, expecting the other to end her with divine wrath, freezing as a gentle hand cupped her face.

“I’m here… to give you this”

The whip was placed within her hand, fingers entwining within her own so that they clutched it together as Sophia turned bewildered eyes upon Uriel, the other woman had always been taller than Sophia.

‘yeah, but maybe Sophia doesn’t like that weapon, maybe she wants something that suits her… Underneath all that love, and kindness is something fierce, I can tell. Let’s face it, that temper REALLY doesn’t fit her designated weapon… and besides, bow and arrows are a little shit really’

‘Raphael!’

The memory played on as the figment of herself and Aziraphale snapped at Raphael, the angel in question simply laughing as he pulled them close and held them tight… They all seemed so happy. Why was she the only one to remember this time? Was this her punishment for hesitation?

“Why are you giving this to me? Gabriel said you all knew I’m a traitor, that I’m tainted by hell… Why are you helping me?”

Her eyes widened as the hand that cupped her face pulled her forward and lips pressed against her own, chaste and innocent… The kiss of someone who had waited so long for this moment.

Uriel broke the kiss gently, resting her forehead against the other woman’s hair as she spoke, their hands still clutched together around the whip.

“You three were always together… And I… I was jealous that both Raphael and Aziraphale seemed to be your only focus in those days. You loved them so deeply, and they shared those feelings… But I only loved you”

Uriel pulled back, their eyes meeting as a tear fell from the arch angel’s eye and she released her hand from Sophia’s, leaving the whip with the red head. Sophia felt like, if she’d had any need for lungs, the air had been punched clean from her as a wave of love hit her with the same force she’d felt in the forest with Adam and his friends. But this was a different form of love… It was the same love she felt towards her boys.

“You… You love me?”

Memories of all the times she’d been around Uriel filled her mind. Every time she’d gone up to heaven to fight the toss with Gabriel, Uriel had been there and watched before trying to calm the situation, hugging Sophia close as she lamented the issue that had caused the fight. Uriel had visited her over the four hundred years she’d been trapped in heaven, listening as the feisty little red head vented and threw the furniture closest to her… Uriel had never given her an order that caused her pain… Uriel had only ever been a comfort… Uriel had never shared in the laughter of heaven at Sophia’s expense… Uriel had only ever loved Sophia.

“I… I never even thought that… I didn’t realise”

“Because your own love… was never mine… Your gaze was never meant for me”

And Sophia felt her heart break at the acceptance that filled Uriel’s face as she turned away and Sophia pulled her gaze back, hand now cupping the other woman’s face. She focused on her divinity, something that was unique to her alone and allowing it to fill the other.

“I’m so sorry that I can’t give you what you want… But you’re wrong if you thought that I never felt love for you, Uriel”

“I know… I’ve always known that your love is for all until they no longer deserve it. It’s only because of their actions that you can no longer feel love for the other arch angels and I’m so sorry that I didn’t try to ease their torment of you… I’m sorry that I wiped your true love’s memories of your time’s together before… I was given no choice”

Sophia shook her head weakly, pulling the other woman close and hugging her, passing her own love through as she whispered her own words softly. So it was Uriel’s work that had stolen her boys memories of their times together before the fall. But she couldn’t feel anger, she couldn’t feel any malice to the other woman. She’d not been given a choice either.

“You never have to say you’re sorry to me… Your actions now have more than made up for it”

They pulled apart for a final time, Uriel taking a further step backwards as they shared a smile and Sophia unfurled the whip within her hand.

“You should go, sweetest Sophia. I shall share the message to your allies that you will call upon them soon… but this is all I can do for you now”

‘Promise me… Raphael, Aziraphale… That we’ll always be together’

The space began to break around them as those final words of the memory scattered upon the wind of the real world trying to break the peace of the moment, a smile shared between both as Sophia gave a final promise.

“Uriel… If I survive this, let’s share a bottle of wine together”

“I will hold you to that, my dearest Sophia”

***

*An airfield on the outskirts of Tadfield*

The rickety old moped touched ground once more with a light thud, stirring the guard from his post as he exited the little checkpoint booth and went to face the threat on his, otherwise, peaceful and easy assignment.

“Who goes there!”

His shout was met by the startled faces of a man and woman, the woman respectfully in her mid-fifties and the man… Well, he could only be described as scruffy and possibly in his early sixties, maybe late fifties if he cleaned himself up.

“My dear boy, you must let us through! It is of the utmost importance!”

The young soldier blinked for a moment as a male voice came from the woman’s lips, the older man waving a finger at him menacingly and babbling something about smiting him with his ‘divine’ finger. Lunatic, clearly. He upped his defensive stance as he pointed his standard issue rifle at the strange pair, ready to final do what he’d been bloody trained for.

“MA’AM step away from this area! This is a classified military base”

“Please, young man, we have to get in there!”

Now she was speaking in a definite female tone. Clearly, she was using ventriloquism to mock him. He cocked the rifle in a threatening manner, causing the woman to flinch slightly as the lunatic behind them continued to shout about his divine finger… Was that an old thunder gun strapped to his back?

The tension was broken for a moment as tyres screeched down the long path leading towards the entrance of the airfield, the sound of Queen’s ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ blearing through straining speakers as all eyes turned towards the source and were met by an inferno on four wheels coming to a halt before them, a body climbing free without a trace of damage. Shadwell made a swift sign of the cross at the familiar man, Madam Tracey noticed the striking red hair and confident swagger, and Aziraphale swore his very being had become a swarm of butterflied and relief as his voice uttered free from Tracey’s lips.

“…Crowley”

“You wouldn’t get that performance from a modern car! Aziraphale, you hitched a ride… Loving the dress!”

Tracey felt the blush of Aziraphale as they all watched the tall man saunter forward before an explosion filled both their ears and their eyes, Crowley spinning on his heels in time to see his beloved Bentley finally give in to the pressure it had been placed under, it’s tyres crumbling and the body crashing down as flames finally took full purchase. 

“… Not a dent since new”

Crowley fell to his knees as grief washed over him and Aziraphale took control of the body he was sharing to trot over to his side.

“Crowley, this young man won’t let us through… DO SOMETHING!”

“I am having a MOMENT here!” 

Aziraphale huffed in annoyance at the demon who sat on the floor before him. He couldn’t bloody do anything to the young man to get rid of him, it was against everything he stood for!

“Crowley! He has a gun!”

“You’d be surprised at how many humans do these days, Zira”

The world seemed to freeze as all eyes turned towards the sound of a gentle voice filled with teasing fluttered towards their ears, eyes widening as flaming hair flickered on the breeze and plush lips quirked upwards into a smile that they had thought they would never see again… Was she wearing armour?!

“Sophia…”

Both Aziraphale and Crowley breathed her name in wonder as she perched upon the top of the checkpoint booth, one leg pulled towards her chest and an arm resting upon it as she focused upon them alone.

“Hey boys… See you got a new look, Zira”

Aziraphale felt a slight blush at her words as Crowley found himself stepping forward, a ghost of a memory playing at the sight of her outfit. He could always remember his fall, but the angel who had thrown him down had been lost to his recollection. The sight of Sophia dressed in armour, the sight of her in her true glory, was almost painful as something began to claw beneath his happiness… Something dark and unwelcome in this moment… Anger, sorrow and betrayal.

The moment was broken as bicycle bells began to ring and all attention was drawn away once more as four children rode passed the guard and the barrier raised without a fuss as the cyclists went through, one waving to the angel on the checkpoint with too much familiarity for anyone’s comfort.

“Sophia! Come on!”

Sophia chuckled and stood to full height, a meagre five foot four inches, compared to their own heights, amplified by her position in the air, choosing to keep her wings from sight as she began to glide downwards, following the children. Aziraphale felt his mouth go dry at the sight, he’d forgotten that Sophia’s armour was a little on the revealing side, that her legs were shapely with strong, thick thighs.

“See you on the flip side, boys… Don’t keep me waiting”

Aziraphale and Crowley could only watch as she touched her feet to the ground and they finally looked upon her face truly. Her eyes… Why were they mismatched? Aziraphale could feel a mournful cry wanting to break from his throat, Crowley could feel a sense of anguish forming within his chest… A demon’s eye held firm within her left socket… Why? 

“Oh Sophia… No…”

Aziraphale found himself moving forward as the guard, once more, began to shout threats. He didn’t even think as he clicked his fingers, sending the human whoever knew where. He could only think about following the armour clad angel across the barrier as she raced away towards the anti-Christ, Crowley by his side and Shadwell following behind, still obsessed with his bloody finger. Madam Tracey didn’t really have much choice but to follow, angelic will was always much stronger than human. 

“Has she…?”

“I don’t know, angel”

***

*Inside a communications hut within the airfield*

The room was in chaos as Anathema and Newton crept out from their hiding place, having watched the four horsemen sent the world into a nuclear nightmare before leaving to greet the arrival of their young master.

The computer screens before them were filled with faces from across the globe screaming in terror as missiles were launched against their orders, as diplomats and military leaders were left powerless and forced to watch their weaponry being used against them.

“What do we do now!”

Newton was beginning to feel his own panic begin to reach new heights as Anathema pulled out a little box from her bag, pulling out a card and reading from it quickly. Seriously, hadn’t Newton told her that he worked with computers so surely, he could do something without relying completely on her?

“He is not what he seems…. Seriously Agnes, you’re not even trying now”

She sighed in annoyance, turning to apologise for her lack of an actual answer, only to find Newton looking like he’d seen a ghost, his face at least two shades paler as he fidgeted with his hands. Why was he acting so strangely now?

“Newt? What does she mean by: he is not what he seems?”

He gave a nervous laugh as he fidgeted harder, looking at her quickly before looking back at the computer screen.

“Ok, so… I don’t actually work with computers”

Anathema went to question him further, only to be cut off as Newton seemed to explode into an apologetic rant.

“Actually, I’m pretty terrible with them. They break as soon as I touch them… always have done. I got a faux radio in a magazine once. You were meant to put it together, but it was never meant to work… It was meant to be a joke radio… I put it together and it started working! Couldn’t even get that right. It’s like I’m cursed!”

Anathema looked at him for a moment, unsure whether to feel shocked at how someone could be that bad, or annoyed that he had lied to her in the first place. She wanted to snap at him, but then something dawned on her as she pushed a keyboard towards him, a glimmer of on idea shining in her eyes as he looked at her in confusion.

“So fix it… You said you break every computer you touch. So fix this one… If you think you can, at least”

Newton huffed slightly at the clear insinuation that he didn’t actually know how to fix a computer. Of course he knew, he’d practiced and studied for years, it just never seemed to work for him. He pulled the keyboard towards him, beginning to tap in a sequence of commands as he spoke.

“Well yeah, I know how to fix it. I just click these buttons and…”

As he tapped the final button, the system monitors before them began to shut down and cancel out the codes that the horseman had placed into action, Newton staring in disbelief as the screens went blank and Anathema pulled him in towards her to place an ecstatic kiss against his lips.

It was about time that his curse proved useful.

***

*The airfield*

Sophia touched ground firmly behind Adam and his friends, the beings before them were those that she had never wished to meet again. War, Famine… Pollution was a new addition to her ‘fuck you’ list. And finally, Death… The big man himself.

“You brought us a sacrificial present, young master… a most beautiful feast before the end”

She sneered at Famine as he bore his razor teeth towards her as she stood her ground. Adam scowled at his words, the way he looked at the angel sent a wave of anger and protection through his system. Was it a mistake to let Sophia come here?

“Do I look like a fucking buffet, you buck-toothed fuck-wit?”

Clearly not a mistake as his eyes widened at the angle’s language. His parent’s had never dared say such things around him or his friends. She looked cool as a cucumber, but Adam could feel the heavenly rage seeping from her as she fixed a look upon death and cocked her chin in defiance as he began to cackle, causing the other horseman to flinch.

“You need only give the word, and we shall follow you, young master… The angel of love is clearly on your side… She seems fierier than last we met”

“That’s what millennia of dealing with Gabriel will do to a girl…I will rip your fucking skull off, you putrid bastard… How’ve you been by the way? It’s been centuries”

Adam sent a quick look towards Sophia, causing the angel to huff and purse her lips. Now was not a time to be running her mouth off, regardless of her anger. Or trying to catch up with the enemy after their shared time in England during the black plague.

“She’s had a long day… But back to business. I don’t feel like causing Armageddon. So you guys can just go back to where you came from”

Silence filled the airstrip, save for the sound of Pepper smacking Sophia’s hand as the angel tried to flip the horseman off.

“But it is your destiny!” 

Death’s voice sounded like a nuclear bomb upon the airwaves as Sophia, with a flick of her wrist, created a quick forcefield to hold the sound within. No one needed to hear that. She’d forgotten how much of a bitch death could be when things didn’t go to plan.

“It’s my destiny! And it’s mine to change as I choose!”

Sophia had never felt so proud as the young boy stood his ground and forced death to face his own will. She’d never once thought that Armageddon could be averted by the simple fact that Adam was human in its best sense. Then again, she’d thought that Crowley had had them all following the right BLOODY child in the first place. She grinned, sending a stink eye towards War as the other did the same. God, she might have hated War more than she hated Gabriel.

“SOPHIA!”

“RENEGADE!”

The separate shouts cut through the tense atmosphere as eyes turned to the side, neither War or Sophia wanting to break their shared death glare but having too as three bodies came to a halt before them, an elderly woman with an angel trapped within her soul and an elderly man desperately trying to wave his left hand index finger towards them whilst balancing… was that a thunder gun?... all huffing for breath and a demon stood beside them looking in exasperation at the pair beside them.

“Not cool, Zira, not cool… And who on this side of hell is ‘Renegade’?”

“Not now, Sophia! We’ll talk later and you can tell us where you have been!”

Sophia would have felt indignant at Aziraphale’s shut down, if it weren’t for the fact that he was now ordering the bewildered old man beside him to aim and shoot Adam with that relic of a thunder gun. For his credit, Shadwell faltered, realising that he was being ordered to kill a child and not a witch.

“Shoot him!”

“He’s a kid!”

Sophia riled at the combined order of Aziraphale and Crowley, the protest from Shadwell, her wings springing forth and enveloping Adam within a cocoon of feathers.

“I swear to god, if you shoot him, I’ll make Sodom and Gomorra look like child’s play compared to what I’ll do to you!”

She drew herself inwards towards Adam beneath her wings as the sound of scuffling filled her ears and a blast filled her ears, her body moving round to shield the boy and preparing to take the blast herself to save Adam. Fuck it, she’d get discorporated and sent back to heaven and an early punishment, but she didn’t care. If that was her fate, then so be it.

Only, the blast never hit. She looked skywards as the shot fizzled out before turning back towards the three, realising that the human Aziraphale was sharing a body with had taken control.

“I’m sorry… You can’t shoot kids!”

Sophia pulled away from Adam as the blast shot fizzled out over head and she turned an irate look towards both Aziraphale and Crowley, her fingers flexing and her whip unfurling within her hand as she gave it a test and cracked it against the hard tarmac.

“I’m in agreement with the human… Nice to meet you both by the way. You both know I don’t tolerate children being hurt… You better believe I’ll be using this whip if we survive this bullshit!”

Crowley felt his mouth go dry at the sight before him. Wings in full glory, heavenly wrath flowing like that day in the garden of Eden, a full suit… more like a bikini… of angelic armour and a whip hanging, tantalising, by her side. If Aziraphale could get his own corporate body back, then could he convince them both into a little roleplay?

“So… Whilst you’re using that whip later, could we also discuss kinks? I think I have a new one”

Sophia could only look at Crowley with exasperated fondness. She should have known he’d focus on anything but her fury. Adam could only stare for a moment, a perplexed gleam filling his eye as he focused upon Aziraphale trapped within a body that definitely wasn’t his own, before voicing his own concern.

“Why are you two people?”

“Honestly Adam, I’ve been waiting for the day that Zira rocked up in a dress… I’m more surprised by the fact it took so long”

Aziraphale gave a little bristle of protest. He was all man, thank you kindly, he just seemed more effeminate compared to his demonic counterpart, who was currently grinning and nodding in agreement.

“Well, if you must know: It all began in the garden, where I –“

“Not now, Angel”

Adam watched the little exchange as Aziraphale used the human’s face to pout at his friend, though he felt that there may be a fair bit more than friendship going on between those two... And he wasn’t going to lie, he could sense the same feeling coming from Sophia as she shook her head at the pair, a look of genuine happiness in her eyes at the sight of them. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t a little envious of the love she felt for those two.

“You should go back to being two people, it’s not right otherwise”

A strange ripping noise filled the air as Aziraphale was forced from the confines of Tracey’s soul, leaving him stood by her side, his vintage clothing as well-cared for as Sophia remembered and his curly blonde hair glistening in the cold sun that tried to steal through the clouds that threatened it’s light. Sophia found herself moving without really thinking as Madam Tracey sent an unimpressed look towards the blond angel before scuttling closer towards Shadwell, the older man not making a fuss as she made to stand closer to him than he’d ever been gifted before. Her arms reached out, grabbing two startled bodies as she pulled them in for a hug that would have shattered a human body.

“You are fucking block-heads!”

“Language dear… But we missed you too”

“Yeah, little renegade”

Sophia gave a choked laugh, so she was the renegade? It made sense when she thought about it, she had vanished without a word of warning. The sound of a throat clearing drew their attention back as war stepped forward, a sword covered in flame held in her hand as she flexed and twisted it before Sophia and the group of children. The two angels and demon pulled apart as they watched the scene unfold before them.

“You cannot stop what man himself has created. Boys and their toys shall wage war, after all”

Crowley took a moment to really look at the sword. He got the strangest feeling he had seen it before, a very long time ago. He sent a quick glance to Aziraphale, noting the look in the angel’s own eyes at the sight of the weapon.

“Didn’t that used to be your sword?”

“I think it may well be, yes”

Pepper felt herself rile at the words of the bloody haired woman, not caring for how blood seemed to ooze from her eyes or how her lips twisted into a bloodthirsty smile, seeming concerned only with the boys in the little group before her.

“I’m not a boy!”

War turned ravenous eyes upon Pepper, the young girl holding her ground as War began to swing the sword more elaborately, trying to intimidate the girl before her. Sophia could have cackled like a mad woman; Pepper was made of stronger stuff than War gave her credit for.

“Oh, a little girl! Go and play with your dollies, little girl”

“I do not endorse everyday sexism!”

Pepper sent her foot flying into the shin of War as the creature moved to clutch her limb and Pepper grabbed for the sword, sparing a moment to look back to Adam for guidance, this was a little more of a fight than she was used too.

Adam smiled knowingly as a thought came to mind… Fight evil with goodness, fight lies with truth.

“Just say how you feel, Pepper”

“I believe in peace… Bitch!”

Pepper thrust the sword forward, shock covering the courage she felt at Adam’s Words as War gave a silent scream and began to shrivel into a cocoon of flames, dropping the sword and jumping back as Brian leapt forward to take her place, Pollution meeting the silent challenge as the grubby child took the sword in hand, his own voice firmer than even he thought possible.

“I believe in a clean world!”

“Good lad!”

Sophia pumped a fist in the air, both Aziraphale and Crowley taking a step back in surprise at her fresh outburst, a wave of pride and love bursting forth as pollution began to sizzle, his skin flowing into sludge that soaked into the earth, a blackened crown falling to where he had once stood as Adam yelled for Brian to drop the sword, allowing Wensleydale to pick up the mantle for his moment of glory, his nerves showing as Famine stepped forward, a cruel glint in his eye as he gripped the blade of the sword and snapped his teeth towards the child before him, unsettling him further.

“And I… I believe in food and… a healthy lunch!”

It was far less convincing than the words of his friends as Famine began to laugh menacingly at his obvious uncertainty and, for a moment, the group seeking to put an end to the horseman and the apocalypse felt that this may have been a trial too tough for young Wensleydale. But a runt of a hell hound felt differently as he darted forward and bit into the leg of Famine, passing his own will into the horseman, causing the creature to writhe as smoke billowed around his form and a set of scales clattered to the floor as he fell into nothingness.

Death watched on as, one by one, his counterparts were dispatched. Adam took a step forward and held his chin high, his words filled confidence and triumph. Sophia smiled at the sight as she stole glances at her boys, the look in their eyes enough to make her own heart burst as she realised, they could finally see the same good in Adam that she had seen from the moment she’d met him. She sent her smile towards heaven, a thought transmitting from her mind to the one entity that needed to hear it in this moment.

‘Do you see, my lord? He was raised with love and kindness… He is the start of your ineffable plan… the start of a world beginning to change for the better’

“Death. The apocalypse is over! You can’t move forward without the other horseman!”

A wind began to billow around Death, his voice becoming a chasm within time, space and existence itself, his voice carrying all the pain and dread that came with his existence as he opened a set of pitch black wings, wings darker than any demon of hell, like vortexes to the unknown, his words drifting upon the wind as he also broke into a flurry of dark feathers.

“Yes… But they have not gone far, simply returned to the recess of humanities true mind and faults… awaiting when they shall next be called upon”

The air fell still as black feathers touched upon the ground, turning to ash upon the now gentle breeze and scattering into the unknown, just like death himself. The remaining supernatural beings took a moment to process what had just happened before a sense of relief passed over their minds and they found themselves holding each other, Sophia finding her face pressed into the chests of the two men she had so desperately wanted to see before turning eyes that fought against tears upon them.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m still gonna kick your arses for trying to shoot a child but I’ve missed you guys so much! I thought for a moment that I’d never see you again!”

“Oh my sweet Sophia… We missed you too. We thought you had been lost too us forever”

Aziraphale choked on his own words as he pressed his face into her hair, Crowley choosing to stay silent as he held her close and stole a sneaky glance at the plump arse held within steel. After all the shit they had endured, he was definitely going to take his chance on grabbing a handful of that… The whip would be a welcome bonus.

They broke away as running footsteps filled their ears and all eyes turned toward two figures coming from behind one of the military buildings, both Sophia, Adam and the Them feeling elation at the face of a certain woman.

“Anathema!”

Anathema couldn’t help but smile as she stood beside a startled Newton, he really hadn’t expected anyone else to be waiting for them after his ‘disarming’ of the nuclear system within the bunker. He’d never been happier to be utterly useless with computers. He blinked as Anathema took his hand and… was the red headed woman in armour giving them a coy grin?

“Hey guys… hey, You two! You stole my book!”

The gaze that had started out as friendly and filled with joy turned menacing as Sophia sent questioning looks towards both Aziraphale and Crowley, the demon grinning as he pulled a book from his jacket pocket and tossed it towards the witch, the lack of care for the already singed book causing Aziraphale to grumble under his breath.

“It really helped! So… yeah!”

As the book flew through the air into the hands of Anathema, only Aziraphale noticed and held the strip of page that fluttered from it’s ruined pages, his eyes scanning the paper and creasing his brow in thought as everyone else around them seemed to celebrate the moment. All except Crowley, a dark shadow covering his face as a realisation filled his mind.

Crowley stepped forward, sauntering towards the children as he decided now, as was a demons way, was the time to burst their bubble.

“Yeah, well done, the end is no longer nigh. Well done, you and your friends have stopped the horseman. But that’s not the end of it! Do you really think heaven and hell are going to just let this slide?”

As if summoned by Crowley’s statement, a bolt of lightening stuck the earth, not far from the group, and a column of fire swirled not far from its counterpart, two figures coming into view as Sophia felt a fresh wave of rage fill her being and she swept the hair away from her face, fixing her eyes firmly upon the unwelcome beings and breaking away from both her boys as she moved to Adam’s side, amongst his friends. A certain purple eyed bastard firmly set in her target range. She chose not to speak, choosing now to realise that, what she had to say, was definitely not fit for the ears of children.

Aziraphale adjusted his bow tie, ever diligent about keeping up his own personal appearance, as Crowley bowed and gave a breath grin.

“Lord Beelzebub”

“Crowley, the traitor”

The demon grimaced at the choice of words, Aziraphale sending a breath glimpse of worry towards him before fixing upon the pair of superior beings once more. But not before looking towards Sophia… He could feel the rage bubbling beneath and noticed how she kept her lips closed. It was a first that Sophia chose not to mouth off without thinking first.

“That is not a nice word”

“Where izzzz the boy!”

Beelzebub chose to ignore Crowley’s protest at her choice of wording as he nudged his head sideward, moving forward alongside Gabriel as the arch angel stepped closer to Adam, a smarmy grin on his face as he used his best, fake, kindness voice on the boy.

“You. Adam Young, am I right? Ok, so we need you to… restart Armageddon”

He motioned his hands in a way that portrayed the desires of both beings as Adam gave them both a look that could, in human terms, be described as ‘why?’

“You want to prove whose gang is better?”

“Exactly! That’s why you need to restart the Armageddon”

Gabriel seemed to fizzle out under the gaze of Adam, unable to break the steady gaze of the child before him.

“Let me try”

Beelzebub moved forward; her smile could only be described as a ‘shit eating grin’. She thought that Adam was rejecting heaven’s will and that she need only say a few words to push him over the ledge.

“We need to get things moving again. You’ll rule the world! Don’t you want to rule the world?”

Her words were sickly sweet, and all fake, as Adam grimaced at her and bit out his own words.

“It’s hard enough to make new games for Pepper, Brian and Wensleydale to play without ruling over everyone else… I’m not interested. I have everything that I’ve ever needed”

Both Beelzebub and Gabriel looked at each other in confusion, neither with a counter argument to the boys words. They really hadn’t expected to face such resistance from the boy, and now they were faced with a different issue as they both sputtered about ‘great plans’.

Aziraphale took a moment as a thought dawned on him, stepping away from Crowley, despite the demon trying to pull him back, and moved to stand by Sophia. He was impressed that she had remained silent, despite the developing twitch in her unnatural left eye, he had an idea that he hoped would pay off.

“Pardon me for interrupting… But is this all connected to the ineffable plan?”

Sophia’s jaw dropped as she sent a look towards the bookworm, amazed that he was actually questioning Gabriel outright and that he seemed to have worked out how to wedge an even bigger spanner into the works of their plans. If it had been a more appropriate time, she’d have miracled a cheerleader outfit and broke into a cheer rally. Would be a lot more comfortable that this bloody suit of armour.

Gabriel sent a scathing glance towards Aziraphale, using his hands once more to try and reiterate his point, that same smug and condescending tone filling his voice as Beelzebub made her own point also.

“Well of course, it’s the great plan”

“It izzz written that the earth shall last for six thousand years and shall end in flamezzzz”

Aziraphale gave a slight nervous chuckle as he placed his question once more, surprised that neither being could give anything more than flimsy answers.

“Yes, that is the great plan… But is it the ineffable plan?”

“They don’t know”

Crowley’s words were almost silent as his eyes widened, the realisation finally hit him also and he made his way towards the group also.

Gabriel and Beelzebub gained a greater look of confusion on their faces as they tried to process the extent of the principalities question. Had they gotten it wrong?

“But it izzz… written”

“God doesn’t play games with the universe!”

Crowley scoffed at Gabriel’s words as Sophia bit down on her knuckles. She was starting to struggle to hold her tongue, or at least not to laugh at the two beings before them as Aziraphale gained his own smile, the same polite smile that Sophia had once taught him.

“Really? Where have you two been?”

Both scuttled away slightly at Crowley’s words as they began to convene between themselves, muttering that it would be difficult to get ten million angels and an equal amount of demons to stand down now that it seemed impossible to kickstart their war once more. The group watched, Aziraphale pulling Sophia’s hand away from her teeth, uttering words ‘It will be difficult to get a new hand if you bite through this one, dearest’.

“Looks like we won’t be getting the deciding war after all”

“Yes… And at least we know whose fault it is!”

The two angel’s and the demon gave answering smiles and waves at the accusation of Gabriel as their superiors stalked back towards the children and their supernatural friends, neither looking best pleased as Gabriel stooped slightly to point a finger towards Adam, completely ignoring everyone else.

“You are an insolent brat! And I hope someone tells your father!”

“Oh, they will!”

Adam didn’t look the least bit troubled by the threat as both beings moved away. What was mister Young going to do? His dad was harmless. Gabriel sent a fresh look of anger towards his two subordinates before turning on Sophia fully, the red head choosing to answer with a grin and a cock of her head.

“Sophia. You’ll be coming with me. Now”

The grin turned into a full toothy smile as a menacing gleam filled her eyes, all suddenly feeling a cold chill crawl up their spine as she stepped passed her group, Aziraphale trying to stop her as worry filled him with a vigour he had never known.

“I don’t think so”

“Are you disobeying a direct order?”

Sophia turned slightly to acknowledge both Aziraphale and Crowley, her left eye the only one visible as she addressed Adam and his friends. From this angle, she looked very much like a denizen of Hell.

“Hey, you guys might want to cover your ears. What I’m about to say really isn’t for the ears of children”

For their credit, the minors all covered their ears as well as they could, Sophia choosing to give a flick of her wrist to further muffle any sound as she turned back and gave her full attention to the archangel before her.

“Listen up, and listen fucking good, you purple eyed megalomaniac. I’ve spent six thousand years listening to you spout shit and, quite honestly, I’m a bit bored of playing nice with a mook like you”

Aziraphale felt like he would discorporate on the spot as rage began to ooze from Gabriel in waves, Crowley preparing to jump in the way if said archangel tried to attack as Sophia chose to carry on, her whip at the ready just encase she needed it.

 

“You barely leave your boring little ivory tower of bullshit, except when you feel the need to harass me… By the way, lying isn’t becoming of an angel so don’t go round say that you don’t ‘sully’ the temple of your body when you help yourself to my wine whenever your fugly mug rocked up at my place. And you honestly think you can talk to any of us about how we should behave or how we should think when you’ve been trying to dip your dick for as long as this earth’s been turning. Do you really think god doesn’t know and see how much of a cretin you are? She see’s everything, you are fucking a tool if you really thought that she didn’t see you.

And whilst we’re on the topic of disobeying direct orders. I’m only half angelic, your words don’t mean shit to me, it just took me a while to realise that I don’t have to dance to your tune to keep you happy anymore. So I’m gonna tell you something that I’ve really wanted to tell you for a long time now, and you can pass the message on to Sandalphon when you drag your bitch ass back up to your plain walled ivory tower: How’s about you make that ‘huge’ effort again, and go fuck yourself with it”

All eyes were on Sophia and Gabriel as the red head took a deep, meditating breath as the other seemed to foam at the mouth, eyes wild and maniacal as Sophia seemed to realise an addition to her words.

“So, basically, if you want me to come up to heaven and listen to you lot talk shite, gonna have do more than demand, because fuck you and I hope you, personally, get wing rot… Also, sorry Beelzebub, but if you are actually going to rat Adam out to dear old daddy-kins, could you tell him that he owes Mrs. Young eleven years in child support payments? Thanks”

“This isn’t over Sophia, mark my words!”

The atmosphere crackled once more as both beings vanished towards their separate factions, Sophia sending multiple rude gestures towards the sky as everyone else seemed suddenly able to breath and she was snatched from her feet and over a narrow shoulder, the face of Aziraphale looking at her own as she broke into the hugest smile and pulled her torso up to hug him towards her, willing her outfit to return to the soft material of her blouse and tartan skirt, grateful that she seemed no longer in need of battle armour. There was no need for it now that the danger had passed.

“My dear, I fear you may have finally gone too far! Don’t you think we were already in deep water before that tirade?”

“Who gives a fuck! I’ve waited six thousand years to say how I really felt to that purpled eyed dick splash! Zira, the earth is saved! I really couldn’t give a fuck anymore! Crowley, put me down!”

“Not happening! This skirt is giving me a great view”

The humans watched the supernatural trio as Madam Tracy muttered ‘weren’t they odd’ and Adam made his way towards Anathema and the young, nervous looking, man by her side.

“You helped stop it all, didn’t you?”

Anathema returned his smile as she pulled Newton a little closer and held his hand tightly within her own, sending a loving smile towards him as he blushed and scuffed his feet against the tarmac.

“Yeah… But it was mostly thanks to my boyfriend”

“… Boyfriend?”

Newton looked as if he may faint with happiness as Pepper rolled her eyes at the sappy display of affection. It was bad enough that Sophia was currently wrestling against the shoulder of Crowley with a look of utter bliss in both theirs and Aziraphale’s eyes, without Anathema and Newton going soft as well. Or, for that matter, the two older people who were stood away from them as the woman fussed over the man, who pretended not to want her attention but did little to stop it.

“Another deluded victim of the patriarchy”

The celebrations were cut short as the earth beneath their feet began to shake, fear filling them once more as they gathered together and Crowley finally placed Sophia down, a look of horror on his face as he dropped to the floor and placed his ear against it. Aziraphale began to wring his hands and Sophia clenched her fists to try to calm herself, both looking towards their demon with panicked eyes.

“Crowley, what is going on!”

“They did it, they told his father!”

All eyes were on the ground as cracks began to form and Crowley gripped the sides of his face, genuine panic now within his own serpent eyes. Adam looked confused at the demons choice of words. His dad? Why did everyone keep talking about his dad like something to be feared?

“He’s coming, the devil is coming!”

Aziraphale reached a new height of panic as he looked down at his beloved demon and shouted the only thing he could think to say, feeling Sophia grip his hand as she too sent a look towards the demon.

“Do something Crowley!”

“Like what? We are FUCKED!”

“I don’t know, but do something or…”

Aziraphale paused for a moment, the sword in his hand twitching slightly as Sophia prepared to snatch it from his hand if she needed too before he finally seemed to find his sensible side once more.

“… Or we’ll never talk to you again!”

A hurt look filled the demon’s eyes as he began to roar, his emotions going into overdrive at the threat as he began to pull himself back to his feet and threw his arms into the air, the world around them altering to nothing but a vast expanse of sand and a gentle breeze fluttering passed four bodies as time seemed to stand still around them.

Adam blinked to gather his senses as he looked towards the other three, the sight of white, silver and black feathers catching his eyes as Aziraphale gave a stretch and a little groan of appreciation. It had been far too long since he’d last let his wings out to breath. Crowley stepped towards Adam, a troubled look still on his face as he spoke.

“We haven’t got long here, but it’s up to you kid… Your father is coming and only you can stop him”

“Why do you keep talking about my dad? My dad wouldn’t hurt a fly”

Sophia chose to step forward this time, kneeling to look Adam fully in the eye as she spoke, her voice soothing despite her own fears. She hadn’t really thought that the devil himself would get involved so soon.

“Not your human dad, Adam, your other father…”

“Your father who is definitely not in heaven”

Sophia sent a brief grimace at Crowley’s words, although it was probably the easiest way to describe the entity about to appear before them, before looking back at Adam and placing a hand on his shoulder in an attempt at comfort. It really was quite a big thing to try to understand and process.

Aziraphale could see the doubt and worry in Adam’s eyes as he tried to think through everything that had happened and everything that was now happening, giving his own soft smile as he tried to beat down his own worry.

“Adam, we were so wrong about you. We were working to make you either completely good or completely evil, hoping to cancel each other out. But what you are now is perfect, and we had nothing to do with it, you were raised exactly how you were meant to be, perfectly human”

“I don’t know if I can do this”

Sophia hugged him tight. Even if they couldn’t stop the devil, she still believed in the boy before her.

“You can do it, Adam, you can do anything if you put your mind too it”

“But whatever you’re going to do, best do it quickly!”

The four of them stood together, hands reaching for each other as Crowley began to restart time once more and they were dropped back into the reality around them, the earth before them bursting open as a horned beast began to claw it’s way to the surface, eyes scanning menacingly as Adam built his courage and began to move towards the nightmare before them.

“Where is my son? You! You are my rebellious son?... Come here, boy!”

Adam didn’t faulter as he stopped just ahead of the towering creature that tried to claw towards him from the cavern within the earth, his chin held high as he shouted the only thing he could think of that made any sense.

“You’re not my dad!”

“What?”

“You’re not my dad! Dad’s don’t wait eleven years and then turn up just to tell you off… You’re not my dad. You never were!”

The towering monstrosity before him began to writhe as he shrieked under power of Adam’s words and belief. Mr. Young may not have been his biological father, but he was the man who had raised Adam, had been there for every birthday and every important moment in Adam’s life. He was the man who loved Adam no matter the trouble he caused in Tadfield with his friends. Any man could be a father, but it took someone special to be a dad.

As the smoke settled and the earth seemed to repair from the intrusion of Satan, a figure began to emerge through the smoke. An old Morris Minor that Adam knew well and felt true relief to see as the car stopped and the one person that he really wanted to see more than anyone stepped from the driver’s side.

“Can someone tell me, exactly, what is going on here?”

Adam wasted no time as he ran towards his dad, throwing his arms around him in a tight hug, leaving Aziraphale to send a quick look of question towards both Sophia and Crowley.

“Is that definitely his father?”

“He is now… I suppose he always was”

“Of course he is… Adam always knew him as his dad”

Sophia gave a sigh, the group watching as Adam and the Them were bundled into the car and driven to their homes, waving towards the car as it vanished from sight and Anathema made her own excuses to leave with Newton, ignoring the knowing grin from Sophia as she told Aziraphale and Crowley off one last time for stealing her book before parting ways also.

“Well dearies, me and mister S had best be off too, it’s a fair way for us to go back to Soho”

Aziraphale gave a gentle smile as he nodded towards Madam Tracey and Shadwell, watching the pair begin to totter off before clicking his fingers and sending them back home with the aid of a quick miracle. He still owed sergeant Shadwell a final fright for his hand in discorporating him after all.

The three stood for a moment, realising that they were finally alone for the first time since this whole mess had started and, honestly, Sophia had never felt so nervous as she swept a hand through her hair and she felt two sets of eyes fall completely on her. That was never a good thing.

“Well… Guess I better be off too. I’ll catch you guys later, we’ll grab some wine”

She tried to make a run for it, only to be grabbed by large hands and hoisted, once more, onto a shoulder. A much broader shoulder than before. Her eyes widened and she looked up to see the face of Crowley grinning at her, a gleam in his eyes that could only mean mischief.

“Not so fast, little renegade. We have questions and you have answers…. We’ll be having that wine now”

“Zira! Talk sense into him! And put me down!”

Aziraphale gave a small chuckle as he began to stride off, the hot-tempered woman held firmly over his shoulder as Crowley matched his step with his own swaggering stride as he cast his own little demonic miracle to summon two bottles of wine into his hands.

“I cannot oblige dearest. We have much to talk about… And much to catch up on”

Crowley grinned wider at those words, remembering the moment in the Bentley and the promise he had made to a certain fair haired angel. They definitely had a lot of things to catch up on.


	17. Chapter 17

How do you go about breaking six thousand years of pining? How do you break a constant stream of unspoken feelings and wishing for a chance to simply be one unit? Its not so easy to do when you put all factors into play. A virgin with NO experience and a secret to keep, a virgin with only a blowjob under his belt and a demon who had had all of humanities history of depravity to play with… Add actual love between all parties into that mix… Not an easy game to play.

Sophia grumbled on the shoulder of Aziraphale as the elevator dinged it’s final stop. Neither she nor Aziraphale were completely comfortable being fully welcomed into Crowley’s dwelling. It wasn’t that they hadn’t been here before, but when they had it had been simply to critique the disguise choices of both Zira and Crowley. And, even then, he’d strictly kept both angels’ to just the living room.

And yet, Aziraphale carried her through the doors and into Crowley’s apartment without skipping a beat, seeming to ignore the fact that his bookshop had been destroyed, that his entire collection of humanities literatures had been lost… Well, not so much ignore the fact, it just seemed something else was on his mind as he eased Sophia from his shoulder and into the plush love seat that Crowley had miracled for this moment.

Sophia looked up from her position on the love seat, a none too impressed expression on her face as she spoke, choosing to ignore the indulgent smile of Aziraphale or the smug grin of Crowley.

“You know, I have legs. I could have easily walked here without being carried like a sack of potatoes on the shoulder”

“Yeah, but you also tried to make a break for it as soon as we were all alone on the airfield. You’re nervous. That’s a new one on you and we want to know why”

Aziraphale hummed in agreement as he placed himself in the seat beside Sophia, a kind smile on his face that had Sophia feeling like she was suddenly in therapy as Crowley brought his golden throne to sit before them.

“He has a point, my dear. You were rather eager to run. And we’d spent so long apart… Why is that?”

Sophia felt a flush come to her cheeks as she swiped a hand over her face and pulled her legs to curl beneath her.

“Are you really going to play twenty questions with me after we just avoided Armageddon? And, by the way, it’s hardly a long time when we usually spend years without either of you seeing me! Give me wine, dammit! Ask questions when I have the vino!”

Aziraphale chuckled as he looked towards Crowley. Two bottles between the three of them as they had waited for the delivery man to collect the remnants of the horseman was clearly not enough to loosen the tongue of love herself as she glared and watched as Crowley summoned three glasses and moved to grab a bottle from his own personal reserve.

Sophia groaned as she took a sip from the glass offered to her, Chateauneuf du pape, a personal favourite for her. Nothing all that fancy really, available for everyone… A little like the very thing she was the angel of. It definitely wasn’t the first drink of the night, but it may have been the most anticipated as she peered over the rim of her glass and mumbled.

“Ask… But you might not like the answer” 

There was a moment as both Aziraphale and Crowley shared a glance before focusing back upon Sophia, or more her left eye as the woman in question sighed and pushed her hair out of her face and looked them fully in the face with both her eyes unobscured.

“Just ask, it’s the elephant in the room for you guys right now”

“Are you falling, dearest?”

Aziraphale was the first to speak as he reached a hand out to cup her face, his thumb tracing the cheek bone beneath the offending orb as Sophia took his hand within her own and held it in place. How was she meant to tell another angel that she had been saved from falling by God herself when…? When someone they loved, who had fallen, sat beside them. What good could be done by lying now?

“No Zira. I’m not falling. I’m half fallen… saved by the only being that could stop it”

“God?”

“…Yes”

Aziraphale reeled back as Sophia clutched for the hand that was no longer there, her other hand automatically placing her wine glass down on the small coffee table before her, seeing as something began to stir within Crowley’s face at her own admission. Why had she been saved from falling? She’d done everything within her power to go against the ideals of heaven… Why shouldn’t she? They had done nothing but cause her pain. She’d spread lust, she’d caused wars… But her actions had caused love in abundance. Lust in those she had reached out too had created happy families filled with love… The wars that she had accidentally caused had made the people rise up in a wave of love for life and posterity. But how were Aziraphale and Crowley meant to understand that? To them… maybe she just seemed a cut off angel now… One of God’s chosen puppets.

“I’m sorry… I never asked to begin falling and I never asked to be saved… I… I was ready for my fall… again”

Sophia clutched at her head as the memory filled her mind once more, tears falling silently as a certain scream filled her mind, the ghost of her own body trying to follow the falling angel as hands wrestled to keep her within heaven’s grasp.

“I should have fallen… I wanted to fall… with him”

Arms encircled her as she shivered against the memory, not really expecting the serpent eyes to stare into her own as she reached out and pressed her forehead against Crowley’s as he spoke, suddenly feeling desperate to stop the pain of the being before him.

“Who? Who would you have fallen with?”

Aziraphale watched as Crowley cradled Sophia to him, a sense of jealousy washing over him as a memory of his own began to resurface. Unwanted and painful as a woman crying and begging to be let go clawed at his mind.

“You… I wanted to fall with you”

Crowley pulled back at her words, Aziraphale feeling a pang of pain within his own consciousness as Sophia forced herself from the demon’s arms and picked up her wine glass, taking a large gulp and draining the content before setting it down once more, moving to stand by the window as she spoke. He saw a flash within his mind, arms reaching for a woman as she tried to throw herself from heavens grace, her screams as they watched their shared love fall from sight… Why could he not remember his name? Why could he only see Crowley’s face now as he chased the memory?

“You… Neither of you remember me… Remember the time before the fall that we shared together… You think we first met in the garden… You don’t remember. Even you Zira, they wiped your memory too”

Sophia could feel her chest wrenching as she clutched at her heart and tried to focus on the world outside the window. They’d worked so hard to gain this moment of forever. And that was what it was, their chance at forever, punishment for their behaviour be damned, this was what they had worked for. Sophia’s chance to let go of the past and move forward with the two that she had always loved beyond even the beginning of the earth. She couldn’t feel anger towards her pain though, Uriel had confessed and had shown true regret. No, she just felt pain at her loss.

“Please… Just let me forget. I can’t have that time back, none of us can. Ask me anything except that… I lost you both once, I was lucky to get you both back… Don’t make me relieve that pain again”

Aziraphale felt the question claw at his throat but stopped his own words as he saw a tear fall from Sophia’s eye. What had they forgotten that meant so much that she would cry? She’d never cried in front of them, she’d always chosen anger. Had her anger always been a mask for her true feelings?

“When did it happen? … Your eye, I mean”

“around the reign of William the conqueror… I spent nearly thirty years in hiding, thought I was going to be dragged down, so I avoided humans and everything else… Didn’t happen, I was just left feeling alone and scared. Realised pretty quickly that they didn’t really care what I did down here… I know what started it… An act of love that I will never regret, she was worth all the pain… But I couldn’t tell you what finally sealed the deal. Trust me, I did a lot of shit to piss off heaven when I was away from you guys… Did most of that on purpose too. No regrets there either, now that I think about it”

A face flashed through Sophia’s mind, a child cradled in her arms as pain filled her body and her tears fell onto the child’s cheek as she looked back into her own eyes. When she’d seen those eyes, she’d felt a love that she’d never expected. A love that had lasted fifteen years, filled with smiles and tears and more understanding than she’d ever known at that point. Fifteen human years was a blink of an eye for an angel. But for Sophia, those years had been a blessing… A blessing cut too short.

Arms enclosed around her as a hand, once more, cupped her face as she was forced to look into serpent eyes. Once upon a time, those eyes had made her blood boil in rage: a mutation of an angel that she had loved so dearly. But time had changed her thoughts. Raphael had never truly been happy as an angel, told not to ask questions and to ignore his own nature… Crowley was Raphael’s truth, it had just taken Sophia a while to feel as strongly for the demon as she had the angel. Now, she couldn’t imagine him as anything other than Crowley, and she loved his eyes most of all.

“Why didn’t you come to us, little renegade… You always run away when things get too much for you. You ran away after I helped you show the human’s how to make a wheel. You ran when Aziraphale helped you part the red sea… We thought we could keep you close for a moment that night after Jesus was crucified, you said you’d drink the tavern dry, but you ran as soon as we got too close to you… You keep your distance, and when we think that you’re gone, you come back. Just like in the sixties… You could have told us anything and we wouldn’t have turned you away”

“Bullshit!”

Sophia felt a rise of anger within her being, mixed with the sadness of her own memories as she tore away from both angel and demon, forcing them to fully look at her once more. 

“You honestly think you could have loved me like this when it first happened? You’re talking from your emotions now. Aziraphale, you were so bent on the idea that heaven was completely good that you would have shopped me at the first sight of my flaw. Crowley, you were eager to make hell think that you were on top of your game. Fuck, you even lied about the Spanish inquisition being yours to get yourself in the commendation pile. If I’d come to either of you with this, you’d have shopped me without a thought. I’d already lost enough because of how I was… I couldn’t bear going through it all again”

“Now you’re the one full of ‘bullshit’. How, as the angel of love, can you not sense how we feel!”

Crowley and Sophia looked at Aziraphale in amazement as he seemed to burst with his own feelings, granted that Sophia was trapped within his arms, but she still managed to crane her head to look at him with wonder.

“Have you paid no attention to our own behaviour over these past centuries? We’ve been dancing around each other and working together for a very long time, dear. Do you really think any of us would have done that without a very particular feeling shared between us? At first, it seemed out of obligation to get our separate tasks done, but then it became an excuse to be close... Did you really need to sneak up to me that day? Dressed in such a way”

Sophia couldn’t help the slight snigger as she remembered that day in the 15th century and turned in Aziraphale’s arms to look at him fully. Dressed like a whore and pressed up against his back as she whispered, ‘fancy some fun?’. Her grin dropped as she remembered, Aziraphale had panicked and gotten her discorporated for that little stunt.

“You realise that I actually forgot about that. Bitch, I owe you some serious revenge for getting me burnt at the stake… Your books shall burn, fucker!”

“My books have already burnt, dearest… Mind your language, I’m sure God doesn’t like it”

“Fuck!”

Crowley smiled as the two seemed to bicker about the past. He could see what Aziraphale had done, he’d pulled Sophia from her dark space. By making her focus on a shared memory, he’d drawn her back and given her back to them. He still felt a little perplexed about what had caused Sophia to down spiral. He’d never seen her actually depressed about anything before and, what made it worse, it was something to do with him.

“Sophia”

Both she and Aziraphale turned towards Crowley, expecting him to add some smart remark to their argument, only to be pulled in a strange sort of sandwich as he pushed his lips against Sophia’s. He pushed her back into Aziraphale, grabbing the male angel by his arse in a firm grip and pulling him forward, causing his groin to meet full with Sophia’s backside.

Both Angel’s gave a squeak of surprise as Crowley pulled away and gave a smirk, removing his shades to reveal golden serpent eyes blown with lust. Both Sophia and Aziraphale were blushing intensely as the demon leaned towards the blonde and placed a similar kiss against his lips, tongue tracing along his lips as Sophia felt like she would discorporate from the ocean of emotions she felt in that moment.

Surprise. Nervousness. Shock at the feel of two efforts being made on both sides of her. And, more than anything, arousal. How the hell was she not meant to feel heated in this moment as her two boys played tongue wars with her in the middle. 

“I’ve waited for six thousand years to do that”

A spike of pain at Crowley’s lust filled words shot through Sophia’s heart as fingers began to trace down the column of her throat, hands moving to grip her hips as Aziraphale seemed to fall into his own rhythm, pulling her back towards himself to emphasise his own agreement for that statement. She pushed the sadness from her mind, a memory of an ill-fated kiss, as she brought her own hands up to cup the cheek of both her boys, biting her lip as Crowley took one of her thighs into his hand and hooked it around his hip, pushing his desire against her centre, feeling the sweet ache of pleasure resonate from her core through to every nerve ending within her human form. Lips pressed against both sides of her throat, one set more experienced than the other as she allowed her head to fall back and a sigh escaped her own parted lips.

The moment was broken, however, as a realisation dawned on her. Sure, she’d imagined doing the nasty with her boys… But imagining it was far easier than actually putting it into practice. She worked her hands down to push at the chests of both Crowley and Aziraphale, forcing her heart rate to slow as they looked at her with confusion. Didn’t she want this with them?

“Look… Erm, so I guess it’s confession time”

Crowley’s face broke into a wide grin as he attempted to pull their bodies closer once more. She really should have known that the demon would get the wrong end of the stick.

“Oh, a confessional kink, little renegade? Bit of a surprise but I can go with that, I’m sure Aziraphale can play the priest while we beg forgiveness and vow to do anything for absolution”

Sophia pulled herself free of the little sandwich as Aziraphale blushed but gave a small nod of agreement, he’d already come to terms with the fact that he was the least experienced of the three of them and, really, who was he to turn down any experience that guaranteed pleasure for all involved. After all, he was a hedonist and he’d definitely enjoyed his experience in the Bentley.

Sophia slapped a hand to her face as she gave a frustrated groan, fighting the ache between her thighs as she felt her patience snap slightly.

“Dammit Crowley! I didn’t mean it like that!”

Dragging the hand down her face and sparing a look towards her fellow angel, she decided to just bite the bullet and get the embarrassment out of the way as two sets of eyes turned bewildered eyes upon her.

“Do you honestly think that Zira is the only fucking virgin in our little ménage et trois?”

Time seemed to freeze as two pennies seemed to drop and Crowley gave a strange half strangled, half groaning sound from his throat as Aziraphale’s eyes widened in, first, realisation and then blissed surprise. He hadn’t expected it, but it was actually rather nice to know that he wasn’t the only one experiencing something completely new.

“You. You’re telling me that the angel of love, the being that spurred on countless orgies in old Rome, who happily walked through the streets dressed like a brothel girl spreading love without a single thought, has never actually gotten down and dirty herself?”

Honestly, Crowley felt that all his Christmas’ had come at once. He’d never felt comfortable with the idea that Sophia had taken other lovers, the idea of hands, lips or any other body part other than his own or Aziraphale’s upon her curved hips, plump arse or thick thighs had always caused some of his more aggravated displays of annoyance. To be told that neither angel had ever been touched in a sexual way other than by himself was honestly one of the best experiences he’d had in a very long time.

“That’s exactly what I’m telling you! Christ on a bike, don’t make this more embarrassing than it needs to be. Do you really think that I needed to spread my legs for everyone to come up with new ways for humans to enjoy sex? No! I’ve just had my entire existence to think up scenarios. I’ve got a filthy mind and also, I never wanted to fuck any one else but you two!... Ah bollocks!”

The blush on Sophia’s face began to spread across her entire body as she realised her own slip up. She hadn’t meant to say that she’d fantasized about the three of them together for as long as she could remember. Unfortunately, Sophia had never been good at holding her tongue when her emotions were running haywire.

Now, in Sophia’s mind, there were a few ways her outburst could have taken the situation. One was that Crowley could have taken charge of the situation, excited by the prospect of two virgin angels, his demonic nature taking control. The second was that he could show some small mercy and ease both angels into the experience. Thirdly and finally, both Aziraphale and Crowley would back off completely, Crowley daunted by the prospect of teaching two virgins and Aziraphale panicking that the situation had lost any sense of control completely and wishing to make some sort of plan. 

What actually happened was a surprise to one angel and a demon as Sophia felt hands grasp her hips once more and draw her back, back pressed firmly against a chest and soft stomach, the buttons of a vintage waistcoat digging through the thin fabric of her blouse. A clumsy hand moved to cup her right breast as the other circled to hold her waist against his own body as lips gently began to pepper along her throat once more. The fact about being a virgin was that you kind of had to take the plunge and hope that you got it close enough to right before learning the more advanced techniques of sex. And it wasn’t like Aziraphale hadn’t researched such matters in his own long existence, not when he’d had his own fantasies knocking around his skull.

Crowley felt his mouth go dry at the sight before him, as two angelic beings melded together for the first time, Sophia’s back arching as Aziraphale kissed a sensitive point on her shoulder and his hand caressed her breast tenderly. They’d never really noticed how much smaller than them Sophia was, her head only reaching Aziraphale’s shoulder as she tried to nuzzle into it. Maybe it was because her personality made her seem so much larger, but now she just seemed so delicate and fragile. She’d kick they’re arses if they said it out loud. He’d never thought that Aziraphale would be the one to take control of the situation but, as the angel rolled his hips and pushed his clothed erection towards Sophia’s core and heard the gasped moan from the little red head, he couldn’t deny that it may have been the most enticing thing he’d ever seen.

“My dearest Sophia, you need only say the word and we will stop. We have never wanted anything but for us all to be together… You must understand, must feel how we feel. Take a moment and feel”

Aziraphale’s hand stopped massaging her breast, his lips stopped tracing along that sweet spot as Sophia did her best to do as he requested, focusing on the very atmosphere that surrounded the three beings as she gave a sultry moan and clenched her thighs together once more. She’d been struggling to contain her own need before, but now that she could fully sense the love and lust that filled the very air around her, she could only curl a hand up and into the golden locks of Aziraphale, her other hand beckoning for Crowley to join them, just as they had always meant to be.

“P-please, I need you both… Crowley”

The way she whispered his name, her lips forming around each syllable as her hand reached for him, how could Crowley resist such a plea. His hand took her own as he drew close once more and captured her lips as Aziraphale began his own work once more, listening as she gasped and struggled to know which way to go as Crowley took her other breast in his hand. He pulled away from her, still cupping her breast as he moved a hand to run it through Aziraphale’s hair, loving how the curls felt beneath his fingers.

“Don’t worry, little renegade, just let go… We’ll always catch you… I’ll catch you both”

None of them had actually fantasized about this scenario. None had thought that their counterparts had ever felt the same way as they traced hands, began to move as one being towards Crowley’s bedroom, forgetting whose fingers undid whose buttons and zippers as a door was opened and quickly slammed shut with a foot, it was anyone’s guess whose foot shut the door, a collection of clothing left behind. Crowley gave a moment to appreciate the expanse of Sophia’s bare back, how the muscles moved and tensed with each movement made by each action, surprised by the thick scar that ran completely from her right shoulder and down towards her left hip. Had it always been there? But then, had he ever seen Sophia’s back uncovered like this? What had caused it, and why did she not heal and remove it?

Aziraphale gave a breath of wonder as he separated from both Sophia and Crowley, gazing at the two bodies before him, unaware to the sight that Crowley had seen. Beautiful, it was the only word he could think to describe the pair, just as he always knew they would be. Crowley was all Muscle and sharp edges, his stomach toned with a thin but clear layer of abs, a body that had never truly indulged like his own had, his legs were wired with muscles that proved he’d always been active. And Sophia, all feminine curves, soft in the right places but still strong, her thighs thick and everything that Aziraphale had always thought them to be, plush and welcoming, a perfect pin-up girl, he could see why she had been mistaken for Aphrodite. He dared a glance down to his own body but was stopped as gentle hands brought his face back up and was met by soft, mismatching eyes as a hand cupped his face.

“Aziraphale… Please don’t make this about aesthetics. You’ve had this body for millennia, and we would never ask you to be anything else, we love you for everything you were back then, for everything you are right now and everything you will be in the future. You are perfect the way you are, never doubt that… Because we don’t”

“But… He said I was soft”

Crowley knew instantly who the blonde was referring too as he gripped Aziraphale’s hand and pulled it to his lips, placing a kiss upon the knuckle before he spoke.

“We all know what that purple eyed prick is like. He wanted to hurt you, angel. Don’t let him… You are perfect for you, perfect for us… Forget what that dick said”

Despite his own self-deprecation, Aziraphale gave a slight chuckle at the insults towards Gabriel, jolting slightly as Sophia placed a gentle hand against his bare chest and pushing her own chest against him as she smiled, her face radiating with a fresh blush as she whispered. She loved the feel of Aziraphale’s skin against her own, a warmth spreading from the point they were touching.

“Zira… You told me to feel how you both felt, but how can you tell me that when you don’t realise how we feel? Like Crowley said: forget what that dick said. What you are now is exactly what we love… You’re perfect”

She pulled herself up onto her tip toes, placing her hands onto his shoulders to give better balance as she pressed her lips against his, feeling as his own hands moved to her waist before becoming more adventurous once more, sliding down to grip one cheek of her arse, hearing the hiss of appreciation that broke free from Crowley’s lips as he watched the two angels explore each curve and expanse of each other’s body.

“Fuck… You’re both perfect. It’s like seeing a Botticelli painting when you look like this”

Crowley pressed himself once more behind Sophia, his arousal digging into her backside as he helped to ease Aziraphale onto the bed. He needed to take some control over this situation if he wanted them to actually go any further than kissing, the pair seeming happy to just explore and taste. Though he had no doubt in his mind he could easily jack off to the sight of the pair as they were now. He’d pictured it enough within his own mind, How Sophia’s breasts pressed against Aziraphale’s chest, thumbs running along his nipples and through the golden locks of his hair as he gripped a firm globe of her arse.

Sophia squeaked as Aziraphale fell back onto the large bad, definitely big enough for three. Had Crowley acquired this bed for this very purpose? Her skirt pooled around her thighs as she straddled the other angel, a hard presence pushing against her own centre as, with the new angle, she found her hips beginning to grind down, chasing the sparks of pleasure that shot through with each movement. With the new position, she was made acutely aware that the silk of her knickers were sodden with her own juices, crying out as Aziraphale gave a reciprocating thrust upwards and rubbing his clothes cock along her slit and against her clitoris. She’d never imagined that it would feel so good to simply have one of her boys pressed between her thighs as the other pressed against her back and reach hands around to pinch her nipples between his fingers, the hell of his palms pushing into the tender flesh and causing her to whimper as she arched back and rested her head against lean shoulders.

“C… Crowley… Too many clothes”

Crowley hummed as his lips found the same point in her shoulder that Aziraphale had found, biting down gently as he found the presence of mind to snap his fingers, relishing the cry that fell from the red heads lips as his teeth sank in and her sodden cunt was suddenly met with the full girth of Aziraphale’s cock, sliding between her labia. She dared a glance down, eyes widening at what greeted her. Aziraphale’s effort was very much like himself, long but not overly so whilst thick, throbbing from its position between her thighs, the head red and pulsating as hands gripped her hips and lifted her ever so slightly, causing the appendage to spring to attention, resting at her own entrance, almost pushing in as Crowley held her up with his hands. She felt a moment of panic, worry that the other angel may split her in two whilst a fresh wave of need hit her and she curled a hand to wrap around Crowley’s neck, feeling the demon reach a hand below, one hand still holding her hip in strong hold.

“Don’t worry, little renegade, you’ll be ok… we’ll stop if it gets too much for either of you”

Sophia nodded, her body beginning to sink naturally down and onto the thick cock at her entrance, a knuckle coming to teeth as she tried to fight the discomfort of the breech, Aziraphale groaning as his hands shot out to grip her hips, one hand linking with the one that Crowley had placed also as the hand that the demon had begun to sneak lower touched on Aziraphale’s arse, fingers miracled slick with lube as he traced along the puckered rim and grinned as the golden haired angel hitched a breath and bucked his hips, pushing his cock further into the warm, wet heaven that surrounded him, Sophia whining around her abused knuckle as she took the sudden pressure.

“Fuck… You could warn a chap first, Crowley!”

Crowley chuckled as a finger began to work it’s way past the rim, easing in as Aziraphale gave another buck of his hips upwards at the sensation, sheathing himself fully into Sophia as she gave a yelp and moved her hands to grasp at his chest, her breathing laboured as she tried to get accustomed to the intrusion.

“Fuck warning you! You could have warned me! It’s like having a tree trunk rammed into a keyhole!”

“Oh really? Maybe I should try it sometime”

Crowley’s words were met with a groan and a whimper as his one finger became two and Aziraphale couldn’t help the movement of his hips, desperate to push into the pleasure of Crowley whilst meeting the warm welcome of Sophia. 

Sophia had to admit, her first time was a little more intense than she’d imagined but, as she felt the discomfort begin to pass and give way to the feel of one of the men she loved filling her completely, she found she couldn’t feel anything but a need for more as she began to move with Aziraphale’s movements, her hips rocking and feeling the cock slip out and then in once more as she found a rhythm, her breathing becoming short as her body sparked with each motion.

“That’s right, renegade… let your hips find a pattern and just lose yourself… Fuck you both look divine”

Crowley’s hand on her hip began to trace upwards, cupping a breast as he pinched her nipple. Sophia gasped at the pained sensation, her head falling back onto Crowley’s shoulder as he removed his fingers from Aziraphale and sent a heated glance towards the fair haired angel who seemed unable to focus on anything but the sensations passing through him. How could he ever focus on anything more when he had his two most beloved creatures bared before him and looking, for all the world and universe, like everything he had always wanted. Sophia above him, her lips parted, and the muscles of her thighs tensing beside his own as she rolled her hips in a manner that made him believe that they had truly been created for pleasure, her back arching and pushing her closer towards their demon. Crowley’s eyes flashing as he took in the sight of both angels, his hand massaging Sophia’s breast as the other moved to guide himself towards Aziraphale’s own entrance. His breath hitched at the first press of Crowley’s cock, feeling the ring of muscle begin to give way to the intrusion as Crowley whispered soothing words towards him.

“Relax, Angel, it’ll feel strange at first, but I promise it’ll feel good”

Aziraphale could only nod as his hands moved to grip Sophia’s hips, tighter than he had thought as she whined and her hips ground down harder on his cock, her eyes meeting his through heavy lids. Crowley took the chance to push deeper into the angel, loving how he groaned and tried to rock down onto him, the motion causing him to move clumsily within Sophia.

Sophia moaned louder at the movement, feeling as Crowley fully sheathed himself into Aziraphale and took a moment to allow the angel to adjust, Sophia taking the chance to turn slightly and place a heated kiss against Crowley’s jaw. She felt on fire as she turned back and rested her hands against Aziraphale’s chest, using her thighs to lift herself and drop back down onto the thick length, feeling it drag along her walls as a flush came to her cheeks and Crowley began to move also, Aziraphale feeling his breath catch in his throat at the dual stimulation.

“F-fuck!”

Both Sophia and Crowley felt a thrill rush through them at Aziraphale’s cry, Sophia leaning down to kiss him firmly on the mouth, using her arms to hold her position above him, crying out as Crowley landed a hand against her backside.

“Wanted to slap your arse for millennia, so worth the wait”

Crowley’s breathing was coming out ragged as Sophia sent him a glance over her shoulder, her eyes clouded, and lips parted as she began to feel the heat coil within the pit of her stomach. With her own movements combined with the bruising grip Aziraphale had on her hips and how both he and Crowley were moving against each other and her, she doubted she would last much longer.

“Ladies first, renegade”

Sophia felt the heat within her explode as Crowley’s hand circled around her hips and find her clit, rolling along the sensitive bundle of nerves as she felt the air punched from her lungs and the heat that had been focused in her core began to spread, white spots filling her vision as all her nerve endings seemed to ignite and spring to life.

Aziraphale had been close before Sophia’s inner walls had clamped down on him, feeling a wave of euphoria flow through him as he felt himself spill into and fill Sophia, gasping as Crowley’s thrusts became more desperate, each thrust sparking a sensitive gasp from his lips as he rode out his own finish, before a guttural groan filled the air and he felt the heat of Crowley’s own Climax fill him.

The three remained still for a moment, each catching their breath and processing what had just happened between them. The desire had always been there, but none had ever felt brave enough to cross the threshold. Sophia couldn’t help the small chuckle that escaped her lips as she began to pull away, feeling the emptiness as Aziraphale slipped from within her and she placed a quick kiss against both their lips, moving to stand from the bed to retrieve her wine glass from the living room, flicking her wrist to cover herself with a silk dressing gown as her boys followed behind and summoned their own garments. 

Crowley’s eyes focused for a moment, once more, on her back as he remembered the scar that had stretched from shoulder to hip. Could he ask what had caused it? Would she ever tell them even if he did ask? His musings were stopped as Sophia passed them their wine glasses once more and they fell into their age old position on the sofa, her back rested against Aziraphale and her legs draped along Crowley’s lap as he traced a finger’s along her thighs. Maybe it was best to just let her reveal her secrets in her own time. Afterall, there had to be a few considering all the time she’d spent away from them.

“So, how are both planning to dodge heaven and hell now?”

The question hit like a tonne of bricks as Sophia casually swirled her wine glass within her hand, an easy smile on her lips as Aziraphale began to fidget and Crowley cleared his throat, not really knowing what to say to the sudden change of topic. One minute sex, next minute survival.

“You mean Agnes’ final prophecy? ‘When all is fated and all is done, ye must choose your faces wisely, for soon enough ye will be playing with fyre’… That one dearest?”

“Yes Zira… That one”

Aziraphale frowned, he really didn’t know. He had no idea what to expect from either side, but he knew it wouldn’t be good for any of the three involved. But something also told him that Agnes was only referring to himself and Crowley, what about Sophia?

“Don’t fret the small stuff Zira, I can look after myself. Been doing it for a long time already. But I think you need to look at the answer blatantly in front of you… Not safe to be an angel, not safe to be a demon so what’s left?”

Both Crowley and Aziraphale took a moment to think, Sophia watching as she shook her head in dismay and chose to put them out of their misery.

“Fuck me, I thought you two had some sense. If you can’t be yourselves, pretend to be each other! Swap faces. Agnes mentioned fire, so she means hell fire for Aziraphale and that means holy water for Crowley. Switch places, should be problem solved”

“What about you, renegade?”

Sophia took a swig of her wine, a glint in her eyes as she smiled slyly over the rim.

“Told you, don’t worry about me… I’ll figure something out”


	18. Chapter 18

*flashback*

Her feet fell silent upon the earth as she ran through the hellish streets, eyes filled with rage and pain as wooden buildings burnt around her, humans running for their lives as others slaughtered, raped and pillaged. They couldn’t see her… couldn’t hear her screams of anguish that turned to forceful winds that only fed the fire that ruined all around them further.

Vikings… She hated them… her whip manifested in her hand as she began to lash at any she could reach, the sound of crying filling her ears and fuelling her hatred further. This village had been a farming community, peaceful and unassuming. What did Vikings think to achieve by committing such atrocities here. No gold… Only bloodshed and stolen land.

Her eyes widened as she turned a corner, the sight of a child curled over the body of her fallen father, his eyes wide and haunting as they seemed to stare straight at Sophia, his daughter unaware of the brute moving towards her, his sword raised and ready to cut down another innocent life.

“Papa! Papa wake up!”

The words cut into Sophia’s being like the blade in the Vikings hand as she found her feet moving towards her without thought, her arms wrapping around the small human, her body becoming visible to the humans around her, as the sword swung down and cut deep into the flesh of her back, not enough to discorporate her but it would definitely leave a scar if she didn’t tend to it soon. But she couldn’t seem to find it in herself to care as watery eyes turned upon her own and time seemed to freeze. Blue eyes, only a little darker than Aziraphale’s… where was Aziraphale? Couldn’t he hear the suffering? Couldn’t he come to help? How could heaven condone such violence? Sophia turned her face towards the animal of a man as a sneer twisted upon her lips and her mind seemed to go blank, her arms still holding the child as blood flew and screams turned to silence.

When her mind finally returned to her, she was alone and holding the child that stared at her with mixed wonder and fear. She felt panic begin to replace her rage as let go of the little girl and did her best to hide the blood stained whip. What had she done? She wasn’t meant to interfere, only observe and step in afterwards to help time heal the wounds. Why had she stepped in for this single child?

“Who are you?... Why won’t my papa wake up?”

Sophia had never really felt anything beyond duty towards humans but, as those eyes met hers once more and weak hands swiped at tears, she found her heart breaking and her knees giving way. A child should never know such horror, children were meant to be protected.

“My name is Sophia… I’m sorry, but your papa has gone to a better place, he’s safe now… And so are you”

The words felt like ash in her mouth. How could he be going to a better place if that place would accept what had happened here? She tried her best to give a reassuring smile, seeing that it did little to sooth the child as she began to wring her hands, eyes darting around at the buildings that blazed around her, at the bodies lying on the ground and the living that ran without a glance back.

Sophia had never had to deal directly with a child before, especially not one that had just lived through a massacre. She let herself slump to the floor, the earth cold against her backside as she wracked her brain for something to say.

“What is your name, little one?”

“Matilda”

Sophia nodded, keeping her hands in her lap and doing her best not to seem threatening. How the hell was she meant to sooth a child? 

“Are you an angel?”

Her eyes went wide at Matilda’s words. How could she tell? Was Sophia projecting her aura without thinking?

“My papa said that, if I prayed, an angel would keep me safe… is that you?”

She was nodding in agreement before she could think, going rigid as the child threw her arms around her and began to cry for all of heaven and earth to hear… And all Sophia could do was let her, moving to hold her once more as tears covered her shoulder.

“Do you have family left? Did your mother get away?”

A shake of the head said no as little hands clung to her tunic for dear life. 

“Mama died last winter… Illness”

It seemed a day for Sophia to forget all she knew as the words fell from her lips and, though she didn’t know it straight away, her life and way of thinking began to change forever… For the better.

“Then come with me… I’ll be your guardian angel for as long as you need me”

*End flashback*

Sophia smiled at the memory as she moved around the rarely used kitchen in Crowley’s apartment, the coffee machine humming as she reached to touch the tip of the scar on her shoulder, a fond smile upon her lips as she remembered her beloved child.

Little Matilda. Sophia’s light and salvation. It was almost funny to think now how angry Sophia had always been before their meeting, how she’d only done her duty as the angel of love because of orders. That little girl had shown Sophia how important love truly was and how little there was of it in the world. It was funny that one human child had taught the angel of love to truly feel and appreciate life around her. Fifteen years with her sunshine had not been enough.

“Oh Tilda… I miss you so much”

“Who’s Tilda?”

Sophia nearly threw the coffee in her hand as she jumped at the sound of Crowley’s voice, turning to face him as her eyes widened and she took in the demon before her. Dressed in nothing but a pair of sleep pants, he looked a mixture of gorgeous and adorable as he rubbed his sleepy eyes and scratched idly at his toned, slender ribcage.

“I didn’t think you’d wake up so soon… Where’s Zira?”

Crowley narrowed his eyes slightly at how the angel dodged his question, moving to stand beside her as he helped himself to some of the coffee she had brewed. Who was this Tilda? Why would Sophia try to avoid telling him about her?

“I woke up because Aziraphale is snoring like a foghorn from hell and trying to conquer the entire bed. You’d think he’d never slept in six thousand years”

“He hasn’t. I’m surprised he’s done that now… I guess everything that happened has taken it out of him”

Crowley seemed to ponder the thought, a mischievous glimmer filling his eyes as his hands found their way to Sophia’s waist and he positioned himself behind her, his chin resting on the top of her own head.

“Maybe. He did get a double whammy last night and I suppose there was the whole antichrist business and thinking you were actually dead… Now tell me about this Tilda, is she anything to do with the scar on your back?”

Crowley felt how Sophia went rigid in his arms, something she hadn’t done in a long time. That was all the proof he needed to know that the scar was linked to the ‘Tilda’. 

Sophia screamed at herself in her own head, how had she forgotten to hide the scar last night? Sure, pent up passion and love, but that was no excuse to drop the ball!

“Yeah… I have that scar because of Matilda… Just forget you saw it”

“How am I meant to forget something like that? It goes from your shoulder to hip, so it must have been serious. Why didn’t you heal it? How long has it been there?”

Sophia pulled herself from Crowley’s arms, feeling the anger rising within the demon at the thought that she had been hurt. Could he understand? Maybe he could… He wasn’t like any other demon.

“Her name was Matilda… I was there when her village was attacked by Vikings and I got this scar by shielding her from a sword… I healed it enough to stop the bleeding, but I never got round to getting rid of it… It reminds me of how much I loved her… Still love her”

Crowley felt his anger fade at the look in Sophia’s eyes, longing and mournful like he had never seen before. He knew that it was sign a she was finally allowing him and, eventually, Aziraphale, to see past her façade of confidence and short temper, showing who she really was, but it still hurt a little to think that anyone else had held such a strong position in Sophia’s heart. 

Sophia sighed, moving towards her own neglected coffee cup and willing it back to the correct temperature, taking a sip before she chose to say anything else.

“You have to understand, I hadn’t seen you or Zira since Christ’s crucifixion. I was so angry about how humanity had acted and treated each other… And then there was this little girl, alone and scared, but she had so much love in her heart… It was like being born again when I met her, a chance to become someone better and figure out exactly what the hell I was created to do”

She couldn’t help the slight laughter that broke free as more memories came to her and she smiled, warm and full, her eyes turning to Crowley, causing the demon to stop breathing for a moment at the sheer radiance within the simple gesture. Sophia must have truly loved this child.

“You know… She didn’t stop crying for a year, she had nightmares of that day and I was always there to hold her and wipe her tears… She taught me how to love like a mother… But then she became this little force to be reckoned with, so full of life and so smart, she was brilliant. She reminded me of you a little once she got her fire back”

Crowley felt a strange warmth in his chest at those words, almost like he could imagine this boisterous little girl in the middle ages causing havoc under the protective wing of Sophia. Almost like imagining Sophia raising his child.

“She sounds incredible if she made such an impression on you. I wish I could have met her whilst she was alive”

Sophia stared at the wall for a moment, a look of longing in her eyes like Crowley had never seen before.

“I wish you could meet her”

“When did she die?”

A flush came to her cheeks as Sophia failed to find the correct words, leaving Crowley to question his own wording as he stumbled for an apology, words that felt so foreign to his own tongue. He had expected Sophia to get annoyed as she pointed out the things wrong with his question… He hadn’t expected the angel to place her coffee cup down, scratch her head with an awkward smile and say the words she spoke.

“Well… see that’s the funny thing… really funny if you think about it… well, she isn’t dead”

Crowley felt like he had been frozen for a moment as he stared in a mixture of horrified wonderment at the red headed angel, seeming unable to reply as she scrambled for a continuation of her previous statement.

“She’s the reason I began to fall”


End file.
